Clint Barton shot straight up in his bed in the newly named Avengers Tower. He had another nightmare, he had been having them a lot since Loki took over his mind. In the two months since the battle, he fell in to self hate for all the people he killed. He felt that he was weak for letting Loki take his mind. This time in his nightmare, he killed everyone in the tower without blinking an eye. He had started to cut himself after the first few times the nightmares struck, he figured it was the only thing that could pull him out of the memories.
He stumbled into his bathroom and grabbed his blade. Tonight had been a particularly bad one, because this nightmare was one of his greatest fears. His slashed and slashed at his wrists, loving the sting that brought him back into the present. He stared at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes were their normal grey, but there was a emptyness. He looked down at his arms and seen that some were bleeding pretty bad. He grabbed the bandages and wrapped his arms and headed down to the common floor. It wasn't like he was going to be going back to bed after that.
Bruce Banner was sleeping off a hulk-out in his room, but woke up feeling the guilt returning. During the fight against Dr. Doom, the Hulk had taken out an apartment building. The building had been evacuated, but it still scared him. What if it was full of innocent people? If only the Other Guy had his common sense then it would be safe to unleash the Hulk.
He decided to head down to the kitchen on the common floor to get some tea. Tea usually calmed him down, but nothing could take away the guilt. He got in the elevator on his floor and told Jarvis to take him to the common floor. When he stepped out of the elevator he heard the TV on low. He wanted his tea, but curiosity got the best of him. He saw Clint sitting on the couch in front of the TV.
''Clint, what are you doing up this late?'' Bruce said. Clint didn't make any move to answer him. ''Clint?'' He tried again, touching Clint's shoulder. He flinched and shot to the other side of the couch. He looked at Bruce with terrified look that quickly turned into an unreadable mask.
''Uhh, did you need anything Bruce?'' Clint said, starting to feel embarrassed. He had a tiny crush on Bruce and he just acted like a complete idiot. Bruce was the main person, besides Natasha, who tried to help him after Loki's mindfuck.
''I'm sorry if I scared you, I asked why you were up so late.'' Bruce told him, feeling kinda bad he scared him. He really liked the archer, whether it was more than friends he wasn't sure. Mostly because he knew that if a person actually liked him enough to be in a relationship, he couldn't do it. He would just end up hurting them.
''Um, nightmares.'' Clint said with a nervous laugh. ''I thought this would clear my mind, but it didn't work.'' He finished. He felt conflicted about telling this to Bruce, he felt exposed. He was leaving himself vulnerable. Clint feared rejection, he didn't even know if Bruce was into men.
''Well ill leave you to it, I'm just going to head down to the lab. Nightmares aren't a stranger to me.'' He silently cursed himself, why didn't he offer to stay and talk?
''D-did you want to stay and talk about it? It might do us both some good. We can be alone together.'' Clint told the doctor, kicking himself for it. Bruce felt his heart flutter at the thought of being 'alone together' with Clint.
''Um yeah, that sounds really great.'' Bruce said with a smile, moving to sit by Clint, who had his knees tucked under his head and his arms around them. ''I'll go first, if you want.'' He added, looking at Clint for confirmation. Clint only nodded.
''Well tonight wasn't really a nightmare. Every time the Other Guy makes an appearance, it makes me feel guilty. Every time I let him out, before hand I can't help but think I'm going to kill innocent people, and that it would just be easier to run. When I came back and saw that he took out that building, I wanted to run, scream, and cry at the same time. Even after Cap told me it was empty, I kept thinking about the what ifs.'' Bruce said, sounding exasperated.''But I'm trying to tell myself that what he does is good, and that it's helping people. I guess that's what's keeping me here.'' He finished with a small smile. Clint returned the smile but then his face fell.
''Well, ever since Loki took over my mind I've been having nightmares, really bad ones. But tonight had been the worst one ever. It was one of my biggest fears come to life. I went back under and killed everyone in the tower, and laughed about it.I feel like horrible for killing all those innocent people. I was on the roof the other day and I was going to jump, and just be done with everything. I don't deserve to live with everyone here, or at all-''. He was cut off with warm lips on his. The kiss was gentle and unsure, he leaned in and returned it. But it ended almost as soon as it started.
''I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry for-''. This time Bruce was cut off with a kiss. This time the kiss was firm and sure. Clint moved himself to sit on the slightly larger man's lap, the kiss never breaking. Clint ran his tongue along Bruce's bottom lip and he was immediately let in. Their tongues fought for dominance, Clint's winning. But Bruce couldn't care. When they both needed to breathe they broke away.
''Don't be sorry for that, ever.'' Clint said with a smirk, that quickly disappeared when Bruce's smiled turned into an emotionless mask.
''Clint, you were really going to jump?'' Bruce whispered looking into Clint's eyes.
''Y-yea, yes I was. I thought it was the only way. I was about to jump over the railing when Thor came back from Asgard, and I chickened out'' He replied, finally breaking into a sob. ''I'm such a fucking mess! Look at me, look at what I did to myself because I was too weak to handle it all.'' He sobbed out, yanking up his hoodie sleeves and tearing the bandages off. The fresh cuts displayed to Bruce. With Clint still on his lap, Bruce wrapped his arms around Clint's shaking form.
And Clint buried his head in the crook of Bruce's neck and sobbed.
When Clint pulled his head up, he had stopped crying and Bruce wiped the rest of the tears away from his face. His eyes were red rimmed and his face was splotchy, but Bruce thought he was beautiful.
''I probably look hideous.'' Clint said looking ashamed.
''Impossible. You're beautiful.'' Bruce said kissing his forehead. ''Every part of you'' he added while kissing the exposed cuts. ''And so what if you're a mess, we all are. But you are my beautiful mess.'' He finished, a few tears in his eyes.
''You are so sweet, and you're right. I'm yours and only yours.'' Clint said with a quiet laugh.
''Good, do you think we should try to sleep now Clint?'' Bruce asked him.
''Only if you're with me.'' Clint replied.
''I wouldn't have it any other way'' Bruce said kissing his lips.
A/N: Thanks for reading! This is my first full story! This will be just a one-shot, unless I get people wanting more, reviews and comments are welcome. (This was based of the song "Alone Together" by Fall Out Boy, I own NO rights to the song)