Notes: I can't make a meme. I really don't know how. But I can write a half-way decent story and say in 2500 words what a meme could say in about 25.
Pure fluff. I've been in a fluffy mood lately, I guess. Don't get comfortable, I'm sure I will be attacked by the angst again soon. ;)
(See the end of the work for more notes.)
Late January in New York was bitterly cold. Today there was a light snow falling and the clouds hung so low Avengers Tower was shrouded even from the high-rise across the street. It was Saturday and people would be building snow men in the park, or skating at one of the outdoor skating rinks. At least Maria assumed they were. She preferred the warmth of the indoors if she had a choice, and she had work to do that required her to be at least near the office today.
She was in a small common room on the Avengers levels, small by Stark's standards, only 1800 square feet of space. Stark sat at the bar in the corner reading his tablet while Maria sat at a table near the window and read through the latest intel Coulson had sent her. Every so often Tony made some sort of mumbled comment or a noise to indicate his pleasure or disgust at whatever he was looking at. Maria ignored him. She'd grown accustomed to his loud outbursts and had stopped asking what they were months ago.
The elevator dinged to indicate its arrival and Maria looked up to see Steve Rogers walk in. He greeted the two and walked over to sit at a sofa that faced the window. Tony watched him for a moment.
"It's about time," he said. "I thought you were going to use up all the hot water in the building."
"What?" Steve asked as he glanced up at Tony.
"Maria said you went to take a shower after you guys worked out," he said. "But that was hours ago."
"Was there some sort of meeting I missed?" Steve asked.
"No, but Maria's working and Pepper's in California," Tony said.
"You wanted someone to play with?" Steve asked.
Stark rolled his eyes at the super soldier.
"How was Brisbane?" he asked Steve.
"Warmer," was all Steve said.
"Well, you're just a wealth of information," Tony said.
Steve only shrugged.
"Seriously?" Tony asked. "You're gone a month and that's all I get?"
"You want a kiss or something, Tony?" Steve smirked.
Maria coughed quietly as she held back the laugh that wanted to escape.
Tony glanced at her.
"Very funny," he said, then was finally silent.
Maria was settling back into her reading when Stark barked out a loud guffaw. She again ignored him but Steve hadn't spent as much time with Stark as Maria had over the past several months, and he seemed to feel the need to be polite.
"What?" he asked as he looked up from his book.
Maria sighed just loud enough that only Steve, and possibly Stark's AI, could hear her.
She watched from the corner of her eye as he flicked a glance to her in brief question before his attention was drawn back to the billionaire.
"This meme is hilarious, and just so true it's scary," Stark said.
Maria closed her eyes and tried to shut out Stark's voice.
"Here, I just sent it to both of you," Tony announced as Maria's mail server notified her of a new email.
She groaned audibly to indicate her displeasure at having her work interrupted and determined to ignore it until she heard a strangled noise from Steve. She looked up to find he was casting a sidelong glance at her and his face was slightly pink.
"It's your fault, Cap," Tony said and shook his head as he stood. He grabbed up his tablet and left the room.
Maria watched his retreating form before she turned back to Steve. He cocked an eyebrow and gave her a bemused smile.
"Did you look at it?" he asked.
"I have better things to do," Maria groused.
"He put it on his Twitter," Steve said as he glanced back down at his screen. "It's trending."
There was something about Steve's demeanor and the way he kept glancing at her that finally forced Maria to give in and look.
When she did she puffed out a disgusted breath.
"Shows what he knows," Maria commented.
"Did you see the comments?" He asked.
Maria sighed and clicked on her screen to view the replies. Then she gave Steve a nasty look.
She shook her head then turned her focus back to her work.
Shortly she heard Steve speak into the air.
"JARVIS, some privacy, please," he said.
"Of course, Captain Rogers," the ethereal voice replied.
Maria pretended to ignore Steve as he stood and sauntered in her direction. She had a pretty good idea where he was headed with this.
He came up behind and placed one hand on each side of her, effectively trapping her between himself and the table where she was working. He leaned down and in a husky voice asked, "So, how much do you care about the environment and endangered species?"
Maria replied with a graceless snort.
"Aw, don't you care about the wittle animals?" He spoke with a babyish whine.
"I care about them greatly, I'm sure" she said. "But if that meme was true, the bald eagle would have been taken off the endangered species list years ago."
"Maybe they just need a few more," he whispered in her ear.
He moved his hands to her arms then skimmed them up to her shoulders as he nuzzled his face into her neck.
"Captain Rogers," she admonished, but her voice was breathy with anticipation.
"What do you say, Commander?" Steve asked as he pulled her collar away from her neck and nibbled gently at the sensitive skin there. "Why don't we go back to my room and help the bald eagle off that terrible list."
Maria weighed her options. She had work, but it was Saturday, and almost lunchtime. However there was always the risk of discovery, which she was about to mention when Steve's right hand slid down the front of her blouse and cupped her breast and his left moved to the top button and undid it.
She slammed closed her laptop then stood quickly and grabbed the front of his shirt. She dragged him quickly to the stairwell so they wouldn't have to wait for the elevator or run the risk of bumping into anyone thereby delaying their plans.
Five hours later Maria sat on the bed entangled with Steve as he fed her a bowl of ice cream, intentionally allowing drops from the spoon down the front of her body so he could lick them off her skin.
"Maybe we should go back to the apartment," he suggested. "We could have dinner and hatch some more baby bald eagles."
Maria laughed.
"Three wasn't enough for you?" She joked. "You're such a dedicated environmentalist."
"Five," he said.
"What?" she asked.
"Two this morning, during our, uh, workout, three this afternoon," he reminded her.
"Oh, yeah," she hummed.
"I've missed Saturdays with you."
He moaned happily as she removed the bowl from his hands and dripped a stream of cool melted chocolate cream down his chest.
She set the bowl on the headboard then turned back to her task. She pushed him onto his back and slowly licked the ice cream off his chest, then his abdomen. He gasped and moaned in anticipation as she moved lower.
His phone rang at that moment, Tony's ring tone.
"Ugh," he groaned, disgusted, and Maria laughed at him as she reached for his phone.
"Can't we just ignore him?" Steve said. "Think of all those..."
Maria cut him off.
"Enough with the baby bald eagles," she said. "Answer the phone."
He grimaced as he slid his thumb across the screen.
"What do you want, Tony?" he asked.
He rolled his eyes and Maria smirked. Nothing important, she realized. Then she opened her mouth and slid her tongue slowly across her bottom lip. Steve's eyes went wide and he shook his head. She only smiled seductively and lay back on their bed, her legs spread.
"You know Tony, I'm kinda busy here," he said.
He swallowed thickly while he watched Maria lower her hands to her breasts.
"Did you ever think that maybe I might be trying to help the bald eagle population?"
Maria gasped silently and in one swift move she sat up and grabbed the pillow from behind her bringing it down on his arm that he held up for protection.
"Tony, don't be crude," he said.
Then he smirked at Maria as she sat before him, arms crossed on her chest, a disapproving look on her face.
"Maria?" He asked into the phone. "Why would I know where she is?"
Steve rested his free hand on her knee a few seconds then slid his fingers gently up the inside of her thigh.
"I think she said something about a date," he said.
His hand brushed between her legs and his eyes darkened as he sought and found what he wanted.
Maria swallowed down the moan of pleasure and leaned back onto her hands to allow him access.
"Look, Tony, this isn't junior high, I don't want to spend an hour on the phone discussing other people's love lives with you," he said.
"What?" Steve nearly gasped as his hand stilled. "No, I don't want to talk to you about it in person."
Maria held her breath and waited to hear the outcome of the argument. If anyone were to come into Steve's room right now there would be no way to deny what had been going on.
"Yeah, I guess we could meet there later for drinks," he said.
Maria sighed inaudibly as relief overtook her.
"OK, see you later, Stark," he said then hung up the phone.
He let out his own relieved puff of air.
"That was a little too close," he said. "I'll be glad when Pepper gets back and Tony has someone else to annoy."
"So you're meeting him later," she said.
"It was the only way to keep him from coming down here," he said.
"When?" she asked, then returned to her earlier plans.
"A few hours," he said.
He leaned back on one elbow, the other hand in her hair and whispered her name. It sent shivers of pleasure down her spine, then she caused his own shiver as she licked him from his base to his tip. She sucked his tip into her mouth and twirled her tongue around.
"Maria," his voice was a whimper and he fell back onto the bed as if defeated.
"Oh, baby, please," he whispered and tugged at her shoulders.
She knew what he wanted now so gave one more gentle suck on him with her lips then rose over him. She rested her forehead to his and he skimmed his hands up over her breasts then into her hair.
She shifted herself and lowered her hips to his. He reached one hand between them and she watched breathlessly as he stroked himself several times until he was satisfied with his hardness.
"Ready?" she whispered then kissed him hard on the lips and slipped her tongue into his mouth as he slipped his hardened cock into her core.
As they worked out their rhythm, Steve slid his hands between them, one on her breast, the other to her clit.
She raised up slightly the way he liked. The look of desire and love and awe in his eyes as always drove her harder. She watched his reaction and could tell when he was getting close.
"Steve." Her voice was a plea and he flipped them.
In a moment his moans grew louder.
"Steve," she said. "Please."
As he thrust hard into her and came, he obliged her by biting down on her shoulder. Just enough to leave the type of mark she liked, just enough to get a reaction from her.
He rested atop her for several minutes as their heart rates slowed. Maria ran her fingers through his hair and Steve finally lay his head on her chest and ghosted his fingers up and down her arm.
"We don't do this enough," he said.
Maria smiled.
"Wow, you really are worried about the bald eagles," she chuckled.
She felt his breath puff across her breast as he laughed.
"That, and you," he said.
"No reason to worry about me," she assured him. "I'm not an endangered species."
He picked her hand up and brought it to his lips, placing a kiss on her fingers.
"That's good," he said.
They were silent for several minutes before Maria finally spoke.
"So you're going out with Tony tonight," she said.
"After I sneak you home," he joked.
"I'll get home fine," she told him.
"It would be easier if I went with you," he said.
"Why?" Maria couldn't think how it would be. It seemed far more risky than was necessary.
"I can hide out at the apartment when I decide to ditch Tony," he said.
"Why would you do that?" Maria asked.
"Well, for one, going out for drinks and watching Tony make a fool of himself trying to set me up with some other woman is not how I want to spend the only Saturday night I've been home in a month," he said.
"And two, well, I'm really worried about this bald eagle situation." He started to laugh and Maria joined him.
"Any excuse to spend the day in bed with me," she said.
"Mm-hmm," he affirmed.
He moved off her and lay beside her. As he watched her she stared at the ceiling and thought about how good it always felt to be alone with him. She was never more relaxed, never happier.
He leaned into her and whispered in her ear.
"I have a confession to make."
"What's that?"
"Bald eagles have been off the endangered species list since long before SHIELD found me," he chuckled.
Maria gasped and feigned offense.
"You mean you just used that to get me to have sex with you?"
Steve sighed and skimmed his hand from her shoulder, over her breasts, and rested it on her hip.
"Yep," he said.
They both broke into laughter. When they finally calmed, she turned to him and touched his face. She drank in his look of love, the same one he'd been giving her since their first kiss.
"I love you, Captain Rogers," she said.
That earned a bigger smile.
Steve leaned back onto the pillows so Maria could rest her head on his shoulder.
"I love you, too, Mrs. Rogers."
Notes: What I wanted in the meme was the scene near the beginning of AOU where Tony, Steve, and Maria are speaking to each other in the jet. Tony would say "Hey, I've got a great joke. Every time Captain America has sex, a bald eagle is born. That's why they're endangered." Then Maria would say, "Actually the bald eagle is no longer an endangered species, and that is why. Am I right, Captain Rogers?" And Steve would day, "Always, Mrs. Rogers." Or something along those lines. :D