~Cath's POV~
I run into the bathroom crying and lock the door behind me, seconds later I can hear him pounding on the door, Screaming every drunken profanity he knows at me. I open my hand and look at my blade in my palm, tears rolling down my cheeks I pull up my sleeve past my elbow and stare at it in despair, at the pale skin crisscrossed by bright red lines. Their words are going through my head. 'Fat. Ugly. Worthless. Emo. Freak. Mistake. Trash.' I can't take it. I want desprately to escape my mind, to be anywhere but here, anyone but myself. More than anything I want to go far away where no one can hurt me anymore. I grit my teeth and run the razor along my arm again and again. Blood immediately flows out, dripping off my fingertips onto the white porcilain of the sink. I sob, hunched over as he pounds on the door, calling me out.
"You little rat! You filthy vermin!" He slurred "You had better get out here! NOW!" Something smashes against the door. It sounded like a wine bottle.
"I.. I'm not going to.. to come out... I know... You'll... kill me!" I sob hyperventilating so that I can hardly speak.
"I will kill you if you don't come out!" He screams in rage. "You have three seconds to do what I told you to do or I swear to god I will break down this door you freak!" What sounds like a chair smashes against the door. "One!" He pounds something heavy against the door and i shudder. It won't last much longer. "Two!" He hammers the door again and I desprately try to mop up the blood with toilet paper, I can't let him see again. "Three!" he breaks the door down and I can't hold back a scream. he's carrying a huge axe and he seems three times my size in his anger.
He sees the blood and my blade lying on the sink and his eyes burn with fury, i see his arm move and the flat of he axe collides with my rib cage, I scream in pain and I can't slow down my breathing. "You wanna cut?" he yells. "You wanna cut you little emo freak? Huh? I will show you what I think of cutters!" He shoves me to the ground and kneels on top of me, digging his knees into my shoulders. I can smell the alcohol on his breath and I know he is drunk. He's usually drunk. The fingers of his right hand clutch my blade and his left hand forces my forearm down flat on the tile, digging the blade in deeper than i had cut in a long time. I scream in pain and feel him slug me in the face. "Shut up!" he growls, taking the blade to my arm again. I bite back screams and sobs, silent tears running down my face. There is nothing I can do to escape and nothing I can do to stop him. After a while he finally seems finished. he throws my blade to the side and squezes my throat with one hand. I gasp, trying to breathe and he leans close to my face and growls. "If I ever catch you cutting again, I will finish you off freak. Do you understand me?" I nod, wide-eyed, there isn't enough air in my lungs to speak.
He leaves, grabbing a bottle of tequila from next to the broken remnants of the door, and stumbles down the hallway into his room. I shudder so hard that I almost can't move but I have to stop the bleeding. Tears are streaming down my cheeks. I am pathetic.
I shakily get up and turn on the faucet, washing the blood off my arm. Looking in the mirror I see the monster that I really am When I don't hide myself. Battered, bruised, my black eyeliner smudged all over my face. Hideous beyond comparison. I open the medicine cabinet and pull out some gauze bandage and peroxide. I quickly doctor my wrists and put it away. Then i use toilet paper to clean the blood off the walls and the tile, picking up the broken glass and chair parts and throwing them away. I quickly change into some Jack Skellington pajamas ( cgi/set?id=144449107) and lie in bed in the dark. staring at the celing trying desprately to hold myself together.
When the first light of dawn shines through the slats in my blinds I get up, pushing my tangled blue hair out of my eyes I turn on the shower and look in the mirror, deciding. I pull out a tube of purple hair dye, that will look cool with the blue. I massage the dye into the top of my hair with gloved hands, leaving the bottom blue and take off my bandages while I wait for the dye to set. My wrist is swollen and red so I put some more peroxide on them and hope for the best. When I exit the shower I catch sight of myself in the mirror and wince. Aside from the usual ugliness and scars there is a dark purple bruise on my face, two on my shoulders and a huge green and purple bruise on my side from the axe. I look away. I get dressed quickly. A pierce the veil shirt, a black skirt with leggings, and a long sleeved red cardigan that will cover all of the bruises, except for the one on my cheek. ( cath/set?id=143727245)
Next I walk over to the sink and pull eyeliner, mascara and concealer out of a bag on the counter. After applying all three the bruise is no longer visible and my eyes are framed in a thick line of black. I need to get out of the house for the morning, But I can't let him catch me leaving. I leaf throuh my bag, pulling out wristband after wristband and putting them on untill I pull out my favorite one. I pause, holding it in the narrow beams of light from the shuttered window. It is black and has a white print of the Andy Sixx character on it. I think of how many times Black Veil Brides has saved my life. They are the most important thing in my life and the closest thing I have to friends. Tears filling my eyes, I pull the bracelet on along with a grey batman wristband. Finally I sling my favorite batman bag over my shoulder and shove my wallet in it.
I walk quietly to the door and open it slowly, lifting it slightly so the hinges don't squeak. I walk past the living room on my way to the door and there he is. He's passed out cold, sprawled on the couch with numorous bottles next to him. I hold my breath as I creep to the door and open it slowly, praying he doesn't wake up. For once in my life, my prayers are answered and I make it to the cracked sidewalk in front of the shabby, peeling house. I start to walk briskly towards the city, It's only a few blocks away and I get there quickly. I wander for a few hours thinking over my miserable life. I have never had a friend, or someone who cares about me. When that... thing... adopted me I was about two and I had been in an orpanage my entire life. Then he brought me here, he was the first person to really break me, terrifying me, beating me, threatening death if I disobeyed him. He would get drunk or high all the time and threaten me for no reason. He knows that he can do whatever he wants because I have nowhere else to go. One would think that I would be able to find friends, Or at least a nice teacher, but no. I was a target at school, an outcast. They called me ugly, they called me emo, they called me fat, they called me a freak. I catch sight of my reflection in a store window. A lump rises in my throat. They were right.
I wander aimlessly, lost in thoght. I turn the corner and glance up for a second. I stop and look again. not fifty yards away from me, parked on the side of the road is the Black Veil Brides tour bus. Not only that, But JAKE, ASHLEY AND CC ARE STANDING OUTSIDE!
I supress running over so I don't look like a total idiot and instead walk briskly over to the bus. When I'm about five paces from three of my favorite people in the world, Ashley turns around and smiles at me.
"Hi." I have every expectation that I won't be able to speak, But I manage to stammer out
"hello." I can't believe this is actually happening. Ashley laughs and Jake says.
"Black Veil Brides fan huh? What's your name?" I blush
"It's Cath. How did you know I was a fan?" CC laughs, always the class clown "You have that 'oh my god I can't believe they're real' look about you." I laugh, slightly embarrased, but still happier than I had ever been before.
"You can't blame me, I've idolized you guys for as long as I can remember. Can you sign by batman purse?"
"Sure" Says Jake and I hand it over, blushing. Two people come by to ask Ash why he's wearing eyeliner. He answers them cooly
"Because I enjoy it." I see Jake glance upward for some reason and I'm about to ask why when suddenly someone yells in a fake high pitch voice just behind me
"OH MY GOD! IT'S THE BLACK VEIL BRIDES! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!" The voice sounds farmiliar. Oh my god. I whirl around. Standing right behind me is a tall, thin man with dark hair and crystal blue eyes. Andy Biersack. He catches sight of the shocked look on my face and cracks up. The entire band starts laughing to. I smile, and then I start to laugh a little too. I can't believe this is happening. When I look up at him, I see that he was already looking at me, our eyes meet and I suddenly can't breathe. I've seen hundreds of pictures of him, but they can't quite capture the dazzling brilliance of those bright blue eyes. They catch my gaze and don't let me go. I feel like I could get lost in them forever. Beautiful. That single moment stretches to become it's own small eternity.
I feel like I should say something so I just say quietly,
"Hi, my name is Cath." I'm surprised I can even speak. He beams down at me and his perfect smile is all I can concentrate on.
"Cath..." He says gently, his real voice sounding, if possible, even nicer in person. "That's pretty. Is that your full name?" I glance away, wishing my first name were better. "No." I can't bring myself to tell him my full name so I just stay quiet. He smiles that amazing half-smile of his.
"What is your full name?" He asks, a playful spark in his eyes. I smile back a little.
"It doesn't matter, I go by Cath." Dumb... Dumb thing to say. Why can't I think straight?
"Okay, If that makes you happy." It's better then my real name. I think to myself. I push my newly dyed hair out of my eyes and smile at him. He pauses for a second, then points at my wrist and I feel myself instantly switch to panic mode. Does he see my scars?
"Looks like we're twins." he says in his deep voice. I try to keep smiling, but inside I am panicking. Did he see?
"Yeah... I... I guess so." I say, It's the only thing I can think of. I push my fake smile so he doesn't see my true emotions. His smile disappears and his eyebrows draw together. "Are you okay Cath?" He asks. I bite my lip, trying to think of something to say.
"I'm fine." He doesn't seem convinced.
"Are you sure?" he asks.
Before I can respond Ashley says something to Andy.
"Andy, we're going to go get breakfast now. Are you coming? Cath can come to, she seems cool." Andy looks at me, smiling that little half-smile again. I look at him quizzically having not realized fully what Ashley had said.
"Do you want to come with us?" he asks. A rush of giddiness and exitement and complete shock breaks over me.
"Really? Do you mean it?" I ask him eagerly.
"Why are you suprised?" He asked. "You're a pretty girl talking to a group of guys." I blush. I know I'm not even remotely good-looking, but it's nice of him to pretend. "I'm not pretty." I say to him. His eyes twinkle.
"My mistake, I meant to say beautiful. Do you want to come?" My heart flips over iteslf and I can barely contain my excitement, but I still feel like I will just be a drag on the group so I say.
"If you really want me to." He breaks into a beautiful, full smile and says quietly.
"I do."
Suddenly CC bursts out.
"Andy! stop flirting, I want some pancakes!" We both blush and I feel like I have to ask him somthing.
"I would love to go, one thing first though." I say, hoping no one will see how nervous I really am. "What?" he asks gently. "I'm a huge fan. Can I have a hug?" he smiles wider. "Of course." He says pulls me into a hug. I hug him back and I feel like This must be the highest point in my life. At the very least it's the best part so far.
After a few seconds I break the hug and I hear Jake speak up.
"Alright, let's go get some pancakes." Andy looks at him and adresses the group in general.
"Okay, where are the other two who were just here?" I assume he must mean the snobby couple who asked Ashley about his eyeliner. Ash answers.
"They weren't fans, they were just asking why we were all wearing makeup." The other guys nod.
"Oh, okay." Andy says flatly, he sounds tired for a second. Then he picks himself up and takes my hand. I fell a rush of energy and I blush so deeply I am sure everyone must notice, but it's worth it. I look down at my hand in his and smile. this is the only time in my life I've ever been truly happy.