Hey everyone!
4x04 pretty much destroyed me...so this is me trying to write my feelings. I hope you all enjoy!
Song:U Smile-Justin Beiber
I do not own Glee nor Justin Beiber
If I did Santana and Brittany Would Not have separated. But what can you do, aye fandom? :)
U Smile
It has been a month since Brittany and I said goodbye. I still couldn't believe I did it, but I did it for her. I did everything for her. She was the one I love the most. I haven't touch my computer since that dreadful day. If I had homework that needed to be done I walked all the way to the University's Library just so I wouldn't have to take a chance of seeing her online, but finally I am going to brave it.
Taking a deep breath, I opened up my laptop. I went to the internet and got on facebook. I knew that I would probably see something I didn't want to, but lets be real, whatever was up there was probably my fault. Looking at my News page I saw nothing different. People still complaining, useless information sharing, dumb pictures of food, but down at the bottom my eyes caught something. Brittany S. Pierce is in a relationship with Sam Evans. My heart dropped to my stomach. I know I said we didn't break up but we did have an open relationship...and she could do what she want...even date Sam...
A blinking light caught my attention. It said I had missed a video message on iCHAT. Slowly and cautiously I moved my mouse towards the icon and clicked it open. It was a video message from Brittany. It said it was 3 weeks old. She must have sent it to me right after I left for Louisville. I wondering what it is?
I opened up the video and the frozen picture on the front was Brittany holding Lord Tubbington. Wow, he's gotten even fatter. I wonder if he ate another cat?I shook my head to clear my mind and slowly click the play button. Right off the bat, I noticed Brittany had tears in her eyes. Tears that I caused... Then music began to play in the background. I recognized it quickly. As I continued to stare on into her gorgeous blue eyes, I listened...
Oh
Yeah
Mmmm
Oh god, how I missed her voice. When she use to sing me to sleep when I knew school and cheerleading was getting to me. She always knew how to calm me down.
I'd wait on you forever and a day
Hand and foot
Your world is my world
Yeah
Everything was so soulful. I could see right to her soul. I knew she meant every word...
Ain't no way you're ever gon' get
Any less than you should
Cause baby
You smile I smile (oh)
Cause whenever
You smile I smile
Hey hey hey
I don't know how I could ever smile anymore knowing I caused that frown that was plastered on her face. Her gorgeous no longer shined. They seemed almost grey.
Your lips, my biggest weakness
Shouldn't have let you know
I'm always gonna do what they say (hey)
Oh Brittany, you don't know how much I craved your lips. When you smiled at me, my eyes were drawn to your lips. The way they curled and I loved knowing I caused that smile. But now, all I cause is your frown...
If you need me
I'll come running
From a thousand miles away
When you smile I smile (oh whoa)
You smile I smile
Hey
I knew you would come running. But baby, school comes first. And I was holding you back.
Baby take my open heart and all it offers
Cause this is as unconditional as it'll ever get
You ain't seen nothing yet
I won't ever hesitate to give you more
Cause baby (hey)
You smile I smile (whoa)
You smile I smile
Hey hey hey
You smile I smile
I smile I smile I smile
You smile I smile
Make me smile baby
I could feel tears running down my cheeks. They matched the tears coming down your face. You were holding onto Lord Tubbington so tight, I thought he might of popped. But I guess he was the only one there for you...since I knew I failed in that department...Oh how I wish I was that fat cat.
Baby you won't ever work for nothing
You are my ins and my means now
With you there's no in between
I'm all in
Cause my cards are on the table
And I'm willing and I'm able
But I fold to your wish
Cause it's my command
Hey hey hey
You are so beautiful singing your heart out. It's breaking my heart. Watching those tears spill, your hands shaking while holding on to Tubbs, the way you are staring right at me. Right into my soul.
You smile I smile (whoa)
You smile I smile
Hey hey hey
You smile I smile
I smile I smile I smile
You smile I smile
Oh
I want you to smile baby. I want you to always smile.
You smile I smile
I can't smile without you...
You smile I smile
The music ends and your eyes fall down. You are staring at Lord Tubbington. You are petting him like he is all you have left. I am so sorry baby. I am so sorry I left you baby. You look so sad...your eyes are so dull...you smile, no existent.
You look back up at me. Trying to smile. I can't bear it...it's killing me.
"I Love..."
That is all you say... you can't even finish it. You just look back up and smile, not your real smile but a forced smile. I looks like it is hurting you to even try to keep it on your face.
"Goodbye..."
That is all I get. But it is what I deserve. You shut off your screen and mine goes black as well. I pushed you away. So far away you can't even say I Love You.
I Love you baby. I Love you, I Love you, I Love You!
I Shut my computer lid...And I fall back on my bed. I stare up at the ceiling, just thoughts of you running through my mind. Those blue, blue eyes that used to glow. That smile that was contagious and her attiutude that was happy-go-lucky. Then Brittany now, member of the Left Behind club, because of me. Dull grey eyes, now smile, slouching, barely any laughter and now dating Sam Evans. Because of me, Damn Trouty Mouth. I literally handed her over to him. I groaned, rubbing my tear stained eyes..."What the Fuck have I done?"
Thanks everyone for reading...
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