Author Notes: Just to give you a little back ground on this one-shot fix that I am writing. The conversation takes between an OC named Jason Chusei aka Cizin and Emma Frost. Jason is one of the members of the Team of X-men a friend and I created called Outlaw X. The song that this story is set to is Nirvana "You know your Right" and a lot of the information about Emma's comes from the Emma Frost series comics out know go pick them up after you read them you will never see her in the same light again. This takes place right after the battle with Ord in Astonishing #2 and after Emma Conversation with Kitty.
Disclaimer: X – men belongs to Marvel, Jason Belongs to me and "You know your right" belongs to the remaining members of the band.
You know your Right
By
C.W Clark
Aka
Deacon
It was about 2 am at Xavier's School for the Gifted. The halls of the school that were a buzz with teenagers and young adults all mutant all either elated or scared with news that there was cure to for 'Mutant Powers' were now silent. Most of the students were afraid thankful they were scared that government would come after them turning the cure into a weapon. Others that had mutations that deformed them were either overly happy or cautiously optimistic. Then the were the select few in the school that were angry, angry that people thought so little of the things they could do, thought so little of them that all they saw were monsters that needed curing. Jason Chusei and his adopted brother Bart and the members of his newly formed young team of Mutants felt this way. Jason always saw his powers as gift and curse, he could kill masses with a single wave of his hand, in flash of purple flame dozens could be dead but he could remove injures and give time to another. Like he did a week ago in the Danger Room one of the younger kids had been injured in a training accident, stabbed in the chest by a malfunction in the program. Everyone was sure the kid was going to die but something in Jason told him to get Logan and hold on too him and the kid. In few moments of concentration that wound on the young mans chest was gone and Logan healing factor was taking care of the rest as the wound appeared on his. It felt good to save a life, give someone back what was to be taken from them, why should he lose that powers because someone goof in a uniform was scarred of what he could do.
Jason made his way through the underground corridors of the mansion, the nerve center of the were the X-men operated from, in the far distance he heard the soft rumble of Nirvana playing from the weight room and Training Dojo, first he thought it was Bart or Kitsune getting some late night work out in so they would sleep in the next day. Then he remembered that Bart had paper due in the morning and Kitsune was out with Logan doing what ever those two do. Jason quietly made his way to the cracked door a thin beam of light streaming out into the hallway he could hear the music better from here, the driving bass line and angry cords of the guitar wailed in fit of melodic rage singing out, reflecting the pain and loathing of the one who wrote the song.
"They couldn't, nor wouldn't understand the fear of failure that she has, the fear of never amounting to what they want her to be, instead of what she wants to be…her own self." Jason did not understand when he became so perspective, he guessed Sensei was right, he did have sixth sense for seeing peoples pain. Not like his mutant power but innate gift of understanding most people. Maybe it was because he could relate to the fear, the fear of failing those that you love so much, the rest of the team would never know it but he was going to turn down the leadership of Outlaw X give it over to Tracy. Jason just didn't know whether he could live with himself if something happened to his Team that become his friends that in the end became his family. So maybe in that sense he could understand her and in some way reach out to her. For some one so striking beautiful, some who had to power to make anyone bend to her whim and follow her she seemed so alone, so in need of someone to finally accept her for herself, not White Queen but just plain Emma. Now the question who was Emma, had that person who ever she was been lost under years of selling oneself piece by piece to please those that she thought loved her.
"I was never good enough for you father, nothing I did would every make you happy. I was not Adriana, even when I became the splitting image of her I was still never good enough." Emma snarled from between clenched teeth as she attacked the bag with a renewed vigor and ferocity that even shocked Jason at this point.
"I hate you, you took everything away from me, even when I got straight A's never good enough, when I finally found some one understood me you set him up and had him fired. He saw me for who I was and not what he wanted me to be and stole him away from me, just because you could. Just to see me in pain, god I hate you." She continued you to rant on, Jason understood that she was angry and hurt but never to level the he was seeing, from his perch in the room he could see the fresh tears welling in her eyes.
She just wants to love herself
"I NEVER WANTED TO BE THIS!!!" She yelled activating her secondary mutation kicking the back with such force that it was sent flying across the room. Emma dropped to her knees exhausted the words her father and Kitty ringing, playing over and over again in her mind. She never wanted to be like the rest of her family, cold and cruel yet over the years she saw herself becoming that because that was what she was only accepted for, cruelty and a good fuck every once and awhile. She hated herself, she was given one chance to change and before she realized the students that became her children were slaughtered by the men she thought she trusted. Years later she was given a second chance by Xavier to run the School in Boston, there she found a new group of students until once again she failed them and one of them died. Everyone that ever tried to reach out to her either died or she drove away with her feigning like she as cold and hard as the diamond she turned her body into simply because she was afraid to fail there image of her. Feeling that they would never love or want her for who she is; only what they wanted her to be in their mind.
"He loves you know that right, yeah he lost his wife and it was not on the best of terms and he is grieving. Still he really does love you, so now the question is why are down here by yourself instead of with the man that you know will listen?" Jason asked make his presence known to her, her head snapped around that same hard shell once again returning.
"What are you doing in here it's after lights out?" She asked trying to use her best "I am the Vice administer of the school voice" to intimidate him, soon she realized by the look in his purple eyes, those deep burning violent eyes that he was not going to intimidated by her. The look the he gave her was sent a chill through her body it was as if he could see straight through to everything she tried to hide from the world.
No thought was put into this
"I could not sleep, so I went for a walk around the mansion, usually clears my mind. Did it all the time back home…" Jason said with a shrug of his shoulders eying the woman before very carefully. She knew that he over heard everything that she said now he was watching her to see if she would even admit that he did over hear her rant.
"So shouldn't you be getting back to bed?"
"No I have more important things to do." Jason answered, if she wanted to play this game than he would indulge her in that fact.
"Oh really like what spying on your head administrator, so did get off watching me from a dark corner." Emma said with cold grin she did not mean that, she knew Jason would never resort to stalking he was better than that. The boy was the talk of half the female student body, and she could not blame them he was undeniable handsome young man, with his height and body build he could make any girl go weak in the knees. If Emma was still a student and not currently answered for by Scott. There would be some broken hearted young woman around the Institute, because she would have been enjoying all 6'4 and 240 pounds of his frame.
"So is that what you do when you're scared, resort to using the fact that a lot of men find you attractive and wouldn't mind having a quick screw. You do that to protect yourself facing things you don't want to face." Jason shot back in very cool and calm voice knowing that at this point she was looking to either A. Bait him into a fight or B. distract and shock him so he would forget about this whole thing.
"No but I know what you think when you see me, just like half the other young men and men around the school. It never changes not that I don't mind the attention." She said trying her best to keep up the front but she knew she was not going win this, if there was one thing that she learned about Chusei boys as they were called was that they never gave up in the middle of fight.
"Oh so that's what you think, that I and every other guy around here sees you as blonde with big tits looking to fucked three different ways from Sunday."
"Are you calling me a lair?" She said crossing her arms over her chest leaning her weight on to her left leg.
"No, I am saying you're full of shit, Yes you are attractive there is no denying that, hell I go as far to say that you are one the most beautiful women if I have ever met…" He started as she tried to cut of his sentence he raised his hand for her to stop. "And you are one of the smartest, funniest, kindest when you want to be and strongest too. The sad thing here is you don't think the same of yourself."
"You poor naïve boy you know not one thing about me…"
"Really then way are you down here instead of upstairs with the man you know loves you and you love back?" Jason raising an eyebrow, he knew the he cornered her and she knew she was going to get out of this anyway she tried. "Why don't you talk to him Emma?"
"Because he would not understand, he would just want me to be like his former wife, he doesn't want actually me only the illusion I can give him." She answer going over to the bench and flopping down in the most ungracious manner.
"Do you honestly believe that or are you just telling yourself that to take the easy way out, to make easier for you to push him away. You know I never knew Jean Grey Summers and part of me wish I would have she sounds like amazing woman. Who I do know is you, Emma Frost the woman the demands more than best out us, she demands nothing but perfection. The woman that could have turned her back on bunch runaways and nobodies and be living the life styles of the rich and famous. Instead she took the money that she mad herself and rebuilt the school that changed her life so mutant kids could be safe and grow. Now I know about your past and frankly I don't give a damn, Heather doesn't give a damn, Vanessa doesn't give a damn, and neither Bart nor Tracy, gives a damn. Your Hellions don't give a damn about your past. Scott doesn't care about what you did in the past. Hell he was there all those times when you tried to kill him and Jean. Still he found it in his heart not only to forgive you but to love you. Now the question is can you forgive yourself and give us a chance to know who you really are, if you know who you really are." Jason said sitting doing next to his instructor it was funny she was supposed to be the one giving him and now it was he who was giving her the advice.
"I wish it was that easy, Jason I wish it was."
"Never said it was easy but that's what you have friends for and the students Emma, they… we would not know what to do with out you at this school every one of those kids looks up to you, you push us, your stern but fair and we respect that ,even if your best student is an asshole." Jason said with small smile he could not resist taking a shot a Julian.
Pain
"Your right I'm scared, scared that what happened to my first group of students will happen again. Afraid that what happened to Everett will happen too you or Bart or Julian or any one of you. If one of you students gets hurt or killed I would not be able to live with myself, I have watched too many of young charges die over the years." She said calmly.
"I can understand that, I'm scared shitless too your making me the leader of a new team of the X-men I'm responsible for the lives of my teammates who happen to be my friends. I don't want to let them down either." Jason started taking a knee in front of her. "You are not evil or cruel. You not a whore or a slut, you are not what you father wants you to be or what Shaw wants you to be, or what you think Scott wants to you be. You are who you want to be…it time to put those demons rest ain't it, we can't always live up to want of the people want us to be, we have to live to what people need us to be."
"You know for only being 20 years old your have a pretty good handle on things of this nature Jason." She said showing him one of the few true smiles she had shown since them met.
"Well when your girlfriend is trying to get over the torture that her ex-boyfriend put her through you learn a lot peoples expectations." He said thinking about the struggle that he was going through to get Christina to understand that he was not Jonathan he was not ever going to hurt her in that way.
"She had another nightmare…"
"Yeah nothing to worry about I'll just give her some space…"
"Now what did you just tell me, and you go off and do the same thing, why aren't you upstairs telling young woman that loves you, how much it hurts for her to make you into the monster Jonathan was." Emma shot back grabbing her towel and getting up from the bench that they were both sitting. "Practice what you preach ever hear of the phrase?" she said with a hint of her old sarcasm returning.
"Ok I get the point, yeah I know, will bring it up in the morning but you have to promise you won't cut us out anymore especially Scott he may be anally retentive tool box but I like him, he deserves better." Jason said from his spot on the bench.
"Fine I will talk to him and your right he does deserve better."
"Of course I'm that what friends are for…" Jason said giving her that biggest grin he could at the time.
"True but I am still you teacher and instructor and you have an Exam in my class in morning so off to bed and get some rest, I want nothing less than an A from the best Literature student." She said sternly pointing towards to the door all Jason could do was laugh to him self and comply too her commands walking out of room and heading to bed finally realizing how tired he was now.
You know You're Right
Emma stood in the door for a few moments reflecting on what just transpired she did not have to be Jean to be respect around the school. For the first time since Xavier left rating against Jean did not matter to her, did not have replace her for two reasons. One she couldn't no one ever would or could and secondly it did not matter to anyone weather she did or did not.
"From the mouths of babes…" She said softly turning of the stereo and the lights and head to bed in a few hours she would have school full of students to teach.
The End
Author Notes: So what was the purpose if this little one shot. I wrote this to give people better light into Emma Character after reading her series of Comics. They tell the story of her past when she was growing up and her time before she joined the Hellfire Club. I noticed the she lives up to standards of what other people expect of her and not what she expects of herself. She is always comparing herself to some one else her mind. "Superpowers, the best body money could buy and scintillating wit and I still rank below a corpse." That line right there says a lot about how she feels about herself if you read between the lines. As for Jason he is a Character I created and is the leader of my own X man team called Outlaw X they are under the guidance of Logan of all people. I figured he would be good for this story because of what he goes through with dealing with Hs girlfriend Christina's past, he understands thing to shake the monkey of expectations of ones back. Next in the Series will a one shot starring Logan and Scott after Jeans death.