First fic in this fandom so please be gentle. Something that's been slooshing around my brain in many formats for a while now.
"Sy?"
"What?" He shifted across the bed towards Christian.
"Do you ever wonder what your life – our lives – would be like now if Amira had been pregnant?"
"I... Why are you asking now? It's been years."
"Just wondering about the kid thing."
"It's for the best that she wasn't. It would never have worked out and I think I would've ended up trying to get you to take me back again. We'd've been in the same situation but with a fight for access. I would have tried to be a good dad but Amira wouldn't like it, Mum wouldn't like it, and maybe it would've felt more like duty than the privilege it's supposed to be. It wouldn't have been fair on a kid to be born into that mess." His voice wavered slightly.
Christian curled around him. "There's still that part of you that wants to be a dad though, isn't there?"
"I thought I wanted it because Mum had taught me to, like the empire and the wife, just another part of the package. But when we babysit Amy, or Tam sneaks Kamil over, it just feels right, you know?"
"And then we have to give them back and that light in your eyes when you're with them dims slightly."
"Don't try to hide it. I see when yours does too."
Christian snorted and pulled Syed into his arms. "Damn. Never could hide anything from you."
"Why did you start this talk anyway? We'll only get depressed," whispered Syed, resting his head on Christian's chest.
"Actually... I was wondering what you think of adopting?"
"What? A child?"
"No, a penguin(!) Of course a child. We could be parents. Real, proper ones. What do you think?" Christian trailed off, nervously, and looked away.
Syed gently turned Christian's face back towards him. "I think I love you and I'd love to raise a child with you," murmured Syed, as he leaned in and proceeded to kiss Christian into the mattress.
R&R please? I have an idea of how to continue this if people like it.