A/N: I mainly do one-shots, but I had the idea for this story and it wouldn't leave me alone. Yes, my chapters are short. For some reason I think I've written 40 pages and I've only done 2. D: Anyways, I hope you enjoy. This is for Telcontarian and Chibi-sorrow!

Rated T for a couple of dirty words, oh noes! D:

Chapter 1 - Rikku

Sigh.

Friday evenings were so boring, especially when you didn't have anywhere to go. I had tried to read a book but I just kept reading the same passage over and over again. Maybe a crossword puzzle…

Nope, I couldn't figure out what 5 across was.

Another sigh. Perhaps a nap would do…

"Ahem.."

I peaked out from under my arm, which I'd thrown across my eyes to block out the remaining rays of the setting sun. There, standing in the doorway to my room, was my roommate and one of my two best friends, Paine. She made no other sound and didn't move from where she was leaning against the door frame. I don't know how long she stared at me with those red piercing eyes until I shut my own eyes again. If she wasn't gonna talk then I guess I'd just go back to that nap I'd been looking forward to.

I heard an exasperated sigh and then the sound of Paine's boots on the hard wood floor as she walked over to me. Then, nothing. Well, there was a small sound. The sound of Paine tapping her fingers against her arm. I knew without looking that she was standing over me, her arms crossed. Well, she still wasn't talking and I was fine with that. I was starting to get sleepy.

"AHEM."

Dammit. Now I'd have to open my eyes again.

"Ugh, what is it Paine? I'm trying to sleep!" I grabbed my hair in frustration, hoping she'd see how annoyed I was and leave me alone.

"Rikku, it's 5:00 p.m. Why the hell are you trying to sleep now anyways?"

I gave her a look, as if it were the most obvious thing ever. "Because I'm bored."

She rolled her eyes, but I didn't notice. I had pulled my pillow over my face, hoping that she'd get the hint.

"Rikku…"

"Wwwhht" I asked, the pillow muffling my voice.

"What?"

I sighed yet again and removed the pillow. "I said 'WHAT?'"

Paine narrowed her eyes. "No need to yell. I'm standing right here."

I was going to kill her. "I'm going to kill you!" Nice filter there, Rikku. Like I could take the warrior woman standing over me. She'd have me in a headlock in half a second. Worse still, she'd really deduct my respect points then. I was already in the negatives, no need to make it any worse. I looked at her apologetically and tried again. "What can I do for you, Paine?" A smile wouldn't hurt. I showed her my pearly whites.

She wasn't amused, but thankfully she decided to ignore it. "I just got through talking with Yuna."

I waited a moment. "And?"

Paine sat down on the edge of my bed, her eyes still trained on my face but not quite looking me in the eye. Uh oh, this can't be good news.

"She said that Auron's back."

This time it was me that couldn't look her in the eye. "…oh."

"He just got back yesterday, she said. From Gagazet."

I sat up slowly, my nap totally forgotten. I was wide awake now. "What was he doing there?"

"I don't know! Meditating, praying…whatever it is that former monks do when they go off to some secluded spot in the world." She looked annoyed, but I knew it wasn't at me. She knew mine and Auron's history as well as I did. And she knew how much I was hurting inside right now.

She must have seen something written on my face because her own features softened. "Look Rikku, just forget about him. He's a bastard. You deserve someone that's worth a damn."

I couldn't look at her. She wasn't telling me anything I didn't already know. I'd said those things over and over to myself in the past six months since he'd left. So had Yuna and everyone else. But it's easier to say something than it is to make your heart believe it.

"Look, maybe I shouldn't have told you. Yuna didn't want to say anything just yet because she knew you'd be upset, but I figured it was better than seeing him on the street and finding out that way. At least now if you do see him, you can ignore him."

I shrugged, a defeated look on my face. "Easy as pie, huh?"

Paine looked…well, pained. "Rikku, don't…"

"No," I interrupted her, "It's ok. I'll be fine. I'm just… sleepy right now, I guess. I'd like to take a nap, please."

She nodded and placed a hand on my arm, silently reassuring me, before she stood and walked out of the room. I sat there for a few moments, letting memories of the past few months flood into my mind, before shutting down and not thinking at all. One small tear escaped my eye as I laid back down and welcomed sleep.

******

I sat on the front step of his apartment building, hugging my knees and trying so very hard not to cry. Not here, in front of him and the people walking by on the sidewalk. Be strong, I told myself. It's not the end of the world. No, you've almost seen the end of Spira. Twice. This is nothing like that.

I shuddered, tightening my arms. Yeah, that's right. It's nothing like the end of the world. It's worse…

"Rikku, I'm sorry. I just don't know what else to say."

I looked up at him, eyes red but no trace of the tears that burned so badly behind my eyes. "You could say a lot of things. You just don't want to."

He sighed, running a hand over his face in frustration. "I refuse to tell you lies. Especially just to placate you. I'm sorry, but I don't love you. We've…had fun together. And I consider you a very good friend…"

I stood up, angry now. "Is that all I ever was to you? Just a 'good friend'? Bullshit, Auron. It's all bullshit! We've both been through so much together. We took care of each other when nobody else would. I gave myself to you! And I thought…" I choked on my words, the tears threatening yet again. Swallowing the sob in my throat, I continued. "I thought that I meant something to you. Something more than friends." A few tears finally escaped and slid down my face, into the corners of my mouth. I could taste the salty bitterness of them. "I loved you," I whispered, looking at him with my emotions written plain as day in my swirling eyes.

Auron couldn't look at me, a trace of shame on his face. He knew he'd done me wrong. If he were a lesser man, I'd say he'd even used me.

Or maybe I didn't want to think that he would. Was everything I'd thought, everything I'd felt up to this point just one huge lie?

I couldn't take it anymore. I bolted down the stairs, clearing the last two with a jump. Auron reached out to grab my arm, but I moved from his grasp, yelling "Don't touch me!" before I took off down the sidewalk, towards what, I didn't know.

"Rikku." No, I wouldn't turn around, no matter how much he called my name. I couldn't look at him anymore.

"Rikku! No…

"No!" I sat up quickly, almost knocking my head into Paine, who hovered over me looking worried.

"Rikku? Are you alright? I kept saying your name, but you wouldn't wake up. You were having…well, a nightmare I gather."

"Oh…" I shook my head slightly, trying to rid my mind of the visions it had just been filled with. Of course I would dream of him and the last time we'd spoken. He was back, after all. Dread filled me. I didn't want to see him. Couldn't see him. How the hell could I handle it?

Paine watched me as my thoughts raced through my mind. I'm sure she could see everything I was feeling. Finally I looked up at her, the sadness I had been feeling taking over. "Paine, what am I gonna do? I still love him." At this declaration, I finally broke down. This was all too much.

"Shhh, it's ok. Just let it all out." How odd to be comforted by this stoic friend of mine. Tough-as-nails Paine was soothing a hysterical, crying girl. She reminded me so much of him…

I sobbed harder, finally succumbing to the heartbreak I thought I'd left behind six months ago.