Note: Spock's weird eating habit has nothing to do with Granny Smith apples.

Okay, so this story was inspired by this prompt:

Spock eats crayons I don't know where this came from but Spock should eat some crayons.

Possible settings:

-Kindergarden! Spock is the weird kid who eats crayons.

- Spock pulls a box of crayons out of his pocket on a long mission and munches on them.

- or you know, whatever else :D

Super bonus brownie points if you can make is K/S
(crayons are totes safe to eats! They're mostly just paraffin wax, color pigments, vege oil! :D )

I thought this was just the most awesomely hilarious prompt ever and I had to write a story for it. This is that story. :)

Jim knew that Spock was a vegetarian. As were all Vulcans. So, he knew that some of Spock's eating habits would be different from his own. And he was cool with that.

But of all the things that he would have expected Spock to pull out and eat during their shore leave on Delta Magus III, this was not one of them.

They had been at one of Delta Magus' most famous tourist spots- The Maguan Rock Park. Delta Magus was home to some of the most interesting rocks in the galaxy. Most of them were tall and thin like giant stalagmites and reached up to the planet's always purplish sky. And the surface of the rocks was like a kaleidoscope of ever-changing glowing colors.

Jim and Spock were spending the day at the park, marveling at the vivid colors of the rocks contrasted against the sky. Well, Jim was marveling. Spock was attempting to discern the scientific reasoning behind the rocks color changing abilities. He even brought his tricorder.

"Fascinating. I believe these rocks must obtain their energy from the core of the planet," Spock had said earlier. And after that, Jim had kind of tuned him out in favor of being hypnotized by the pretty rocks.

That is until about two hours into their visit when Jim noticed Spock had pulled something out of the bag he brought along with his tricorder.

Jim turned his attention away from the rocks to watch Spock open up a box about the size of his hand. Then, he watched as Spock selected a long, thin red stick from the box and brought it to his mouth. And then he took a bite of it accompanied with a quick snapping noise.

"What are you eating?" Jim asked, puzzled.

Spock looked over at him as though he had not expected Jim was observing him. He glanced down at the box in his grip and back up at Jim.

"It is a substance made primarily of paraffin wax and color pigment," Spock stated almost mechanically, still munching at the red stick.

"I don't care what the ingredients are! Wait- wax?"

Spock nodded. Jim waited. But Spock offered nothing else.

"What is it?" Jim asked, exasperated. He didn't wait for Spock to answer, but instead grabbed the box out of Spock's hands and read the front of it.

Jim stared at the box unblinkingly for a few seconds, then raised his gaze to Spock, his eyes wide.

"You're eating crayons?"

Spock snatched the crayon box back from Jim and said in a slightly defensive voice, "Crayons are non-toxic, Jim. It declares so on the box."

Then Spock picked out another crayon- a yellow one- and snapped a bite off, keeping his eyes on Jim the whole time. Jim stared at him, mouth hanging open.

"You're eating the wrapper, too?"

"Paper is edible," stated Spock calmly, and took another bite as if it was completely normal. Which it was not.

Jim watched him for a few more moments. He coughed and cleared his throat. "So, uh, Spock, would you mind elaborating on this whole crayon eating thing?"

Spock swallowed the piece of crayon he was chewing and tilted his head to the side as if gathering his thoughts. "When I first entered the Academy," he said finally, "a group of students convinced me that crayons were, in fact, a snack that humans often consumed. It did not occur to at the time that they were not being entirely truthful." His eyes crinkled in a smile. "The complexities of human pranks escape me."

Jim smiled back and was about to open his mouth to say something when Spock continued on.

"I was later informed that crayons were actually a drawing utensil." Spock pulled out a purple crayon now and took a small bite.

"So…" Jim began, "why do you keep eating them?"

Jim was surprised to see a green blush appear across Spock's face. Jim frowned at Spock questioningly.

Spock hesitated. "I… find their taste to be most appealing," he admitted quietly, turning his eyes down towards the crayon box.

Jim smiled softly and leaned forward giving Spock a chaste kiss on the lips. Then he took the box out of Spock's hands again. He searched the colors, pulling out a green one. He held it out for Spock to see.

"This," Jim said, "is the color your cheeks turn when you blush." He checked the crayon's label. "It's… Granny Smith Apple," he laughed.

Spock took the crayon out of Jim's hand and then reached out for the box. He slipped the green one back in and pulled out a pink one.

"This," Spock told Jim, holding out the crayon, "is the color you turn when you blush."

Jim plucked the crayon out of Spock's hand and read the label, smiling. "Carnation Pink?"

Spock held the box out for Jim to put the crayon back in and neither of them spoke for a minute.

"You know," Jim said thoughtfully, turning back to rocks, "that box of crayons kind of looks like these rocks. With all the colors and everything."

Jim flashed a grin over at Spock and asked teasingly, "You aren't gonna start eating rocks on me, are you?"

The only response he got was Spock sticking his hand back in the crayon box, pulling out a blue one, and snapping a piece off between his teeth.

A month later, Spock walked in his quarters to find Jim sitting at his computer terminal with a small brown box on the desk beside him.

"Hey," Jim greeted him, standing up and grabbing the box. "I got you something when I beamed down to Ucrion."

Spock took the box from Jim's outstretched hand and opened the lid. Inside the box was a different kind of box that Spock pulled out and held in one hand.

"Crayons?" Spock looked up at Jim quizzically, eyebrow rising.

"Not just any crayons." Jim said, smiling widely. "Scented crayons." He grabbed the crayon box from Spock and opened it. He took out a brown one and sniffed it.

"This one," Jim held the crayon out toward Spock, "smells like chocolate. But, don't worry; it's still got that yummy waxy taste you like so much."

At Spock's slightly offended look, Jim added sweetly, "And it's also the color of your eyes."

Spock's face softened and he took the chocolate scented crayon from Jim, holding it up to his nose cautiously before taking a bite.

Jim watched Spock chew the crayon experimentally.

And he wondered if now would be a good time to tell Spock about his kink for edible body paint.

Yeah, it's silly, but the prompt was eating crayons!

FYI: Crayola totally made scented crayons and they had a chocolate scented one that smelt so good people actually ate it. So, my story has some fact in it. It's not all crack. :)