Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Summary: Sai's quite clueless when it comes to love—and even worse with the pursuit process. But he's got the help of the finest shinobis in Konoha (and Suna)…so wooing Yamanaka Ino over should be a piece of cake, right?
Two and a half years has passed since the Fourth Great Shinobi War and the nations slowly and surely rebuilt themselves and each other. Though the change and improvements were measured, they were undeniably stronger with solid alliances.
With bonds, came friendship, and then peace.
The youngsters of Konoha are of no exception. With peace and quiet, they had a bit more time for themselves and each other and building relationships.
With that, Sai recently decides he needs to catch up on all the ranges of emotions he has been missing. The ex-Root member learns of friendship, brotherhood, and family through his team (and extended former member, reinstated). And with the emotions he's learning, love and the joys of dating are suddenly on top of his list.
After the war, the chance to 'hang out' with the boys of his age came along more often and somehow he found a place amongst Naruto, Kiba, Shikamaru, Chouji…and even Sasuke. It took them awhile to warm up to him—and to Sasuke, but eventually, they got used to each other's tendencies.
When Naruto bounced up to them, high as kite because scored a date with Hinata, Sai felt a little nudge inside his chest. He wanted to be dumbly lovestruck like that too.
When Shikamaru slunked away from their training; muttering troublesome because he was going to be late for a date with Temari, Sai felt that ping again. He wanted to be stupidly devoted like that too.
And when Sasuke sighed in defeat; allowing Sakura to take hold of his head on their strolls, Sai literally thought he was about to have indigestion. He wanted to be disgustingly cute in public like that too.
So when he voiced his eagerness of dating and finding true love with the apple of his eye, he met with several reactions—none of which from his mental library signified goodness. Chouji burped, Shikamaru twitched, Naruto choked, Kiba blanched, and Sasuke scowled.
He probably should've listened to them then, but now he is head over heels and too far in to back out. But the pain—the pain of being in like with someone is unfathomable. How is something that's supposed to be enjoyable hurt so much?! Where did he go wrong? He's pretty sure his nose is busted by the way he's breathing through his mouth now.
Didn't they say 90% honesty in a relationship, the best policy? Sai is so sure he made that comment on the 90% basis. Ah, he can barely see out of one eye at the moment. But from what Shikamaru has taught him—never talk back and never resist. It will be worse resisting or retaliating than to just take the beating lying down.
And thus, he let his body go limp for the onslaught.
xXx
Naruto and Kiba wince as the scene unfolds before them. Shikamaru sits up straight, eyes alert, and body ready to run for the hills, if required.
Even the Uchiha heir had the mind to pale a bit as he watches the thrashing happening in front of him. The sound effects are enough to make him lose his appetite.
Chouji sees his moment from the distraction and goes for the rest of the meat on the grill.
"C-Chouji, how can you eat at a time like this?!" Naruto squeaks, his eyes never leaving the homicide about to happen. The one-sided public flogging manage to even put the blonde Hokage-to-be off his food game.
"He deserves it," The bigger teen states between bites, "You never say the 'F' word!"
"Che," The lazy genius turns away from the scene and leans on the table, propping his chin up with his hand, "Troublesome."
"But he looks like he's in big big trouble! We need to do something!" The hyperactive boy is basically dancing in his seat, but out of fear for his own well-being, he isn't leaving the safety of their barbeque table.
"Uh…Naruto, actually," Kiba taps the blond on the arm, "Doesn't…doesn't it look like…"
Five pairs of eyes hesitantly watch the body fly past them and slam into the nearby wall with a sickening thud. All five of them cringe at the impact.
They watch the assault curiously and the surviving Uchiha finishes Kiba's statement, "…he's enjoying it…"
Sai flies through the air in front of them again. This time, he turns in midair to the five teens seated at the table and waves; his perfected smile graced with blood and dirt—and tears?
"OH MY GOD," Naruto bangs on the table, "He's hurting so much, he's crying! We have to help him!"
"He's not exactly fighting back at all…" Kiba muses and Sasuke quietly agrees with the Inuzuka (and he almost never agrees with dog-breath boy).
The Uchiha clears his throat, "He likes it."
The Akimichi heir continues to eat and Shikamaru watches the ex-Root member fly through the air like a ragged doll with mild interest.
"How do you know? You into that shit too?"
Sasuke frowns at the brown-haired boy. This is exactly where his friendship with the Inuzuka ends. "No. It's obvious dumbshit. He's smiling like an idiot being beaten to a pulp. He's a masochist."
"It takes one to know one." Kiba smirks a tad too suggestively and Sasuke nearly chidori-ed his ass out of the restaurant if not for the sudden loud crashes nearby them.
The second time the ex-Root member flew by them, he turns to them with a mocking smirk, "How's dinner, my dickless friends?"
"WHAT?!" Naruto stands up abruptly from the provocation, "I'll show you!" The rest of the boys blanch at the thought. No one wants to see anything Naruto has to offer in that sense. Well, maybe with the exception of Hinata.
Not quite sure what he is about to do, Naruto stands there awkwardly. He is not about to show that and Sai uses the moment of confusion to run behind the perplexed blond.
"Dammit Naruto," Ino snarls, "Get out of the way!"
Before Naruto could react, a giant fan shoots through the air and slams into his face. With the blond doubling over in pain, Sai is once again exposed and the furious mind-walker grabs him by the collar.
"You," She roars. Ino is quite close to the boys now—actually she's basically standing on top of their barbeque table. Chouji moves his plates aside and away from her path.
Shikamaru picks up the fan at their feet, which Naruto is still laying in pain next to. The shadow user blinks up and across the room at the sand kunoichi. The woman is leaning against the door frame and shrugs, smirking—obviously not the one that threw the fan, but the one that provided the weapon. Temari is apparently incredibly interested in the misfortunes of their male counterparts. Beside her, the weapons mistress stood, also with a mirror expression of childlike awe.
Sai, the unfortunate soul, beams at his blonde goddess. The said-goddess is currently in the process of strangling him with his own shirt, "Hello Beautiful." He manages say before she drop kicks him out the window.
With their sixth member lying on the ground outside, all affiliates raise their hands in a signal of peace and surrender. Ino glares at each and every one of the boys before she stomps off the table and out the door in a huff. Tenten shakes her head pitifully, holding in her laughter as she follows the angry blonde.
Temari swoops over to pick up her fan, smirking at the stunned boys, "That was a good show," She steals the untouched plate with Sai's portion of the meal and saunters off.
"Uh…" Kiba stares at the empty space before jumping out of his seat, "Not paying for the damage!" And dashes out of the restaurant.
Shikamaru sighs, chewing on his toothpick, "You two take him to Sakura." There goes his paycheck. He'll have to ask Ino to repay him for all the damages…when he gathers the balls to. Somehow the two blondes click like peas in a pod and he can't even utter a word without them both shoving unsaid things down his throat and making a scene. Ino and Temari are like fire and fuel. And Shikamaru is just one lucky bastard to be best friends to one and the boyfriend to the other.
Naruto nudges Sasuke as they make their way to the battered teammate on the road, "Hey hey, Sasuke-bastard. You do the talking okay? Sakura-chan will hit you less hard."
"Moron," Sasuke glares back at his so-called best friend, "She'll yell at me more."
"But at least she doesn't pound your ass to dust!" Whining ensues, and Sasuke despises whining.
"That's because she's too scared of messing up my face."
"OH MY GOD, YOU BASTARD. YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE SO VAIN."
"…Hey…morons…" Sai mumbles quietly as the blond slung an arm around him to keep him up. Even when battered and bruised, Sai refuses to let anyone's ego get ahead of them, "Your voices make my head hurt."
Sasuke glares at the other dark-haired male but daintily picks up a rogue tooth on the road with a napkin. Most likely Sai's tooth. They'll have to have Sakura examine him and then implant the tooth back in. Pretty gnarly and gross, but if his girlfriend can do such a procedure, Sasuke can stomach holding onto his teammate's loose tooth.
The painter currently dons one visible shiner over his left eye, a bruised lip, missing at least one tooth and a ton of blood—but he continues to smile.
"Should I ask her to stargaze tomorrow then?"
Naruto and Sasuke shake their heads in defeat. Perhaps, they think, he'll grow out of his Yamanaka Ino obsession and fall for a more reasonable woman—maybe a civilian.
But that thought quickly vanishes.
No normal person can put up with Sai's words and expressions, and no normal person can put him in his place either. Maybe he is fated to be with the temperamental mind-walker.
Sasuke shrugs at Naruto, a silent agreement. Let's just see how it goes.
"That might be better. Let's get you cleaned up first, buddy." The blond laughs and he hauls Sai down the dimly lit street.
Well, hope you enjoyed it! Please let me know how it's going! (And if there's anything I can improve on!)
Thank you!
~ Aya Kazuki ~