Julius stood silently, just staring blankly ahead. He loosened his tie as the sun beat down. A tense silence engulfed him slowly as he waited; waited for the inevitable conversation to happen. Finally after a deep breath, the ancient man in his tweed suit began. Shattering the silence into pieces too tiny to ever be salvaged. Once he spoke things could never be the same.
"I know what you're thinking Alaric. I know you don't want me here but I had to come." he paused for a second taking in a breath before he poured out his soul, before he released the monsters and demons that had been slowly eating him for the past 47 years now.
"I'm sorry, so very sorry Alaric. For everything. The good times that I turned bad. The mistakes I made that hurt you. That made you so upset, so angry, but then wouldn't let you get away from me. I loved you. It was as simple as that, but at the same time it just wasn't. I could have been a better friend, a better man, a better lover. But I wasn't. I always had to have control. I had to own you. I don't understand why that didn't bother you, it didn't affect the way you loved me. You smiled and let me control you and take everything good about you. " Julius stopped for a second as tears began to build up in the corners of his eyes and threatened to spill over out onto his cheeks.
"Why did you stay? Why did you love me? Alaric, I can't understand that. I don't think I ever will." Julius bit his lip. Thinking of the nights he screamed at Alaric, the bruises he left on his nearly flawless skin, and all the bottles of booze he drank to forget all that he'd done to his perfect little lamb.
"I told you to run. Run away and don't look back. That was the one time you never listened to me. You looked back, that's the only reason you came back to me. You saw how upset I was. How I fell apart without you there. Alaric any other person would have burnt their bridges and left me to die and suffer. But Ian you aren't any other person. You came back picked up the pieces and put me back together. Alone." now the tears ran down his face as everything he held in finally came out. He fell to his knees sobbing in to his hands.
"I hate my self. I hate everything I've ever done. You were the one thing that I ever did right or was ever good about me. Then I lost you." he looked up at the cold, hard, unmoving, unfeeling granite. "It's all my fault. I drove you away. But the worst thing of this is even now after 47 years I still regret only one thing. I never got to say goodbye," the old man cried and wrapped his arms around the marble rock as if it would bring back his beloved. The words In memory of the beloved Alaric Beilschmidt carved into its nearly flawless surface.
Hello thanks for reading my 1st one shot! If you liked this you should check out my other story that I'm working on right now I'M NOT STUPID!
I hope all you Americans have a great 4th of July and you Canadians had a great Canada day! Thanks to Saloria for proof reading and being my new Beta.
ยป Alice