Hey people, super short one-shot, basically, I was playing mass effect 2, for the second time and thought... I wonder how a renegade Shepard would deal with the having their loved one leave her. So this is the result, I really should work on a new story... Or Things Changes Pt. 2... Damnit Cole, focus! Anyway here's this, enjoy.
Disclaimer: All Mass Effect lore belongs to Bioware and E.A
The shuttle from Freedom's Progress hovered into the Normandy's docking bay. Kasumi and Grunt sat in silence with Shepard after their encounter with Commander Alenko; Kasumi didn't know what to say to her. She tried to imagine if Keiji showed up after all this time and simply said he didn't trust her anymore, he didn't want anything to do with her at the moment. It was odd to see Shepard so quiet, when she wasn't busting someone's ass, she was inspiring others to fight harder, if she was anything, she was not a quiet person.
"Shepard, you going to be okay?" Kasumi tried but got nothing from Shepard. Even behind her helmet, it was clear she wanted to blow something up to take her mind off of things.
"I'll be fine," Shepard finally answered and left the shuttle.
"What's her problem?" Grunt snarled and exited after her. Shepard hastily made her way through the ship, she didn't look at anyone, she didn't check in with Kelly, she just sped to the elevator and went to her cabin. A saddened Shepard was not a good thing for Kelly Chamber's job.
Garrus was returning to the main battery with his lunch, the mission reports from Freedom's Progress were coming in, but he didn't see any reason to consult it, Shepard kicked ass like she always does, nothing new. "Garrus," Kelly's voice came from behind him and he turned without much thought. "I read the Commander's psych profile, but, I wanted to hear it from you, what kind of girl is she?" Garrus played with the question in his mind for a moment.
"Bad ass, fearless, makes the calls everyone is afraid to make, tough," Garrus began listing the qualities that came to mind when he thought of his Commander.
"No, I mean as a person," Kelly interrupted.
"So did I…" Garrus said confused.
"After Akuze, how did she deal with that?"
"I don't know, it's not a topic she discussed openly."
"Or when on Earth, when she was alone?"
"Why are you asking me?" Garrus cut in.
"She constantly talks of you, I assumed you two were close," Kelly answered.
"Yeah, only after Saren though, before that she we didn't know each other."
"Well… She could really use a friend right now,"
"Why? She get shot? She can take bullets."
"No… On Freedom's Progress, there was a Commander Alenko, Shepard and he talked and she hasn't been seen since."
"What? Kaiden, she loves Kaiden, a deaf Vorcha could tell you that."
"She might not anymore… If you have time, it might be in your best interest to speak with the Commander." Kelly said and returned to the mess hall leaving Garrus to ponder what she said. He never really thought about Shepard as sad or someone who gets sad, but after never having anyone on Earth, losing everyone on Akuze and now the only man she'd loved. It hit Garrus that Shepard, was just a person.
He quickly finished his lunch and paged Shepard's room. "Garrus?" Shepard's voice came over the intercom. "Is everything okay?"
"Oh everything is just dandy, I was just sitting here thinking how interesting a giant gun is when you spend ten cycles looking at it." That made Shepard laugh a little and he continued. "In sincerity, I heard something happened on Freedom's Progress and thought you needed an ear."
"You don't have ears Garrus, but I wouldn't mind the company." She cut off her com and Garrus made his way up. The elevator to Shepard's room was long and slow, and there was something welling up in Garrus' gut, though he couldn't place it. It was a new feeling, not like the feeling before a battle, something like the opposite. He was… Excited, or what felt like excitement, like right before he pulled the trigger on a big time criminal on Omega. 'Why am I eager to see Shepard?' he mused to himself. The elevator came to a stop and he was presented with Shepard's door and he calmly knocked. Shepard opened the doors wearing the standardized Cerberus uniform and poorly done makeup.
"Makeup?" Garrus asked in a sarcastic tone.
"Damnit," She cursed. "If you can tell it must be pretty obvious,"
"Hey I'm not that daft, well… Not in combat anyway…" That got another laugh out of Shepard. "I've never seen you wear it before, why now?"
"I… I couldn't let the crew see me like this, I'm supposed to be strong for them, puffy cheeks and red eyes are hardly a good example." Shepard explained.
"I don't know, red eyes are intimidating, have you seen Wrex lately, he's god damned terrifying."
"I appreciate the attempt at humor, but I'm not in the mood to laugh, is there an actual reason you came up here?"
"Of course there is, to be here for my friend."
"I'm fine," She protested but it was pretty clear Garrus wasn't buying it. Shepard sighed and fell on her sofa. "I'm not fine…"
"Which is more concerning than you know," Garrus took a seat next to her. "Is it something Kaiden said?"
"I thought he cared about me…" Shepard said her voice starting to break up.
"He does,"
"Does he? Then why isn't he here?" She asked.
"Military life is hard, he's got other stuff going on, I'm sure he wants to be here."
"You weren't there… The disdain in his voice, it was like I was a stranger, or an idiot, he didn't trust me Garrus, I thought that when you love someone you trust them enough to know their doing good work."
"Cerberus isn't doing you any favors there, just try and understand it from his point of view—"
"Why? Why should I try and do anything for him? He won't try for me?"
"That's the hurt talking, you know he loves you,"
"Then why isn't he here to tell me that? Why am I stuck with you and not with him!" Shepard snapped and immediately regretted it when Garrus seemed to take offense to it. "I'm so sorry Garrus,"
"It's alright, I'm sorry if I got too informal." He got to leave and Shepard grabbed onto his arm.
"No, you weren't, I'm sorry, please don't go." She seemed to beg.
"I can't replace Kaiden, it was stupid of me to try when all you need is him, sorry I'm just not him."
"I know, I just… I miss him, I need you here just as much as him."
"You and I both know that's not true," He started to walk to the door.
"Please," Shepard called after him and he stopped in the doorway.
"Please don't go… You're the only thing in my life that's stuck around, please don't go!" Garrus came back to her side and sat down. Shepard wrapped herself around him and cried into his shoulder. Years of build up, of hurt and pain, being left to die on Earth, watching her squad die on Akuze, none of it snapped her spirit. This was it, the loss of the first man to love her for more than her body, that's what did the trick, that's what broke Shepard. "Please don't go… I can't lose you too, I can't…" She whispered through her sobs.
"I'm right here," Garrus said. "Kaiden will come back to you, no one in their right mind could stay away from you for too long."
"Why are you trying so hard to defend him?" She asked with a sniffle.
"Because…" Garrus had to think about it for a moment, in truth he wasn't sure himself. "Because I've never seen you as happy as you were when you were with him, when I met you back on the citadel, you were so hateful. You cursed out the council, shot Fist without a second thought, but when you talked to Kaiden, you were a different person, you laughed and smiled, it's like someone had finally broken through the barriers you put up to keep people out, I guess I want to always see you like that." Shepard looked into his small black eyes, almost hypnotized by his words. She brushed her pale hand across his face, she was warm to touch, it felt nice on his cold plating.
"You… Care that much about me?"
"I guess you could say you're one of the few constants in my life too." He shrugged. "My life without you would be pretty dull, you should smile more often, it suits you."
"I have to… Think… Yeah," Shepard stood abruptly.
"About what?" He asked standing with her.
"Human stuff… Girl stuff… Leave!" She pushed him a soft biotic wave and locked the door. Garrus was left, baffled at what had just happened as he entered the elevator. When it stopped on the bridge, the doors opened and Kelly walked inside.
"Did you talk to Shepard?" She asked him.
"Yeah, but I don't think it went well… She kicked me out,"
"Why?" She asked nearly horrified.
"Uh… I said that she was special to me and then she panicked and locked me out saying she had to think." Kelly instantly went from terror to overwhelming joy and seemed to start bouncing.
"Really?" She squealed with delight.
"Yeah… Is that good? Because it seems bad,"
"Oh this is great! I have to tell Kasumi, she'd love to hear about this, don't break her heart," Kelly said and exited to the crew deck. Garrus was even more confused now, was Shepard mad? Was Kelly crazy? Well, yes, but not in the sense he thought.
"How can I break her heart… Are human hearts fragile? Damnit I knew I should've taken xenobiology at C-sec academy, it might look bad on a resume if I kill the galaxy's only savior." Garrus mumble to himself and noticed his email had a new message. He read through it and his mood quickly soured into hatred and remembrance of his past failure. "So… Fade, think you can hide Sidonis from me…" He whispered to himself.
Super short, right? I'm sure there's plenty of GarrusxShepard one-shots out there, but this had been on my mind and I'm hoping it's easier to focus on other stories now.