As Mac stepped off her flight from Washington, the cool Chicago weather enveloped her. She could not be sure if it was the breeze or the knowledge that in less than two hours, she would be sitting in the same room with the man whose heart she had broken three years earlier.
The drive to Northwestern seemed particularly long. Mac was beginning to regret coming. What the heck was she thinking? But she knew that if she could get through this, maybe, just maybe she could handle working with him. The offer was there. Charlie Skinner from ACN had called her numerous times since she returned from Afghanistan. He wanted her to produce News Night. He told her time and time again that he missed watching the news. That what he wanted to watch would not and could not happen without her.
Mac wondered if she could handle being in such close proximity to Will McAvoy. Her guilt had eaten at her since the first time she was with Brian. Even working in the Middle East had not helped eased her guilt. She spent countless nights lying awake trying to push the images of Will out of her mind. What he looked like after she told him. His cheeks smeared with tears, his eyes swollen and red. She could not forget. Every time she cried, she still saw his face. Then she would remember how perfect their time together had been. Nothing could help her forget what she had done to him. She tried to apologise to him, to try and begin to make it up to him. He never returned her emails or the one call she tried to make after being stabbed. This was not just about whether she could handle being near Will. What if he did not want her there? Could she handle that rejection again? She knew the weight Will carried at the network. He may be the anchor, but with his ratings he had quite a lot of pull. Would she be able to handle the rejection again?
"Ms McHale?"
Mac shook the thought out of her head.
"Yes, sorry, I was …."
"This is Northwestern. Call when the panel finishes and I will be around to pick you up."
"Thank you very much."
Mac was flustered but tried to keep her cool. She enjoyed having a private driver today. She was getting lost in her thoughts and was in no state to wait for a cab. She picked up her folder and clutch and headed toward the building. She was secretly glad she could blend into the crowd. Her height made this easier and for once she was grateful she wasn't wearing heels. She headed into the auditorium and found a seat at the back of the theatre. Within minutes, every seat was taken and the lights dimmed.
"Ladies and gentlemen, it is with great pleasure that I am here to introduce the panellists for today's discussion. Please welcome Sharon Matthews, Lewis Riley and Will McAvoy."
Mac found herself enthralled in how inconspicuous Will had become. He does not admit to anything, side with anything. When they read the quote that compares him to Leno, Mac smirks. Will makes a witty remark about audience numbers but Mac knows this is to cover the fact that he wants to bother people. Mac knows which side Will takes. She knows him better than anyone. Three years on and she is willing to wager that that has not changed. But then a question changes everything.
"Hi, I'm Jenny and I'm a sophomore. In one sentence or less, you know what I mean. Could you say why America is the greatest country in the world?"
"Diversity and opportunity."
"Freedom and freedom."
"The New York Jets."
Mac knew that was not what he wanted to say. She knew his reasons. Remembering her folder, she took out a marker and wrote what she would say if she was in his ear. She knew he could see what she had written. With a nudge from the host, Will reawakened. Her presence was enough to disorientate him. He could not be sure it was her, but he was not certain that it wasn't. More prompting from the host and Will launched into a powerful speech about why America is not the greatest country in the world. He shocked everyone in the audience; everyone except for Mac. He had done exactly what she knew he would. She could read him like a book and proved to herself that she could handle the role at ACN.
She made a mental note to call Jim as soon as the panel was over. If she was moving to New York, he was coming with her. It would be hard enough to be around Will again, but to have to do it without Jim? That was just unimaginable. She was not leaving her friend behind. There were three men in the world whom Mac loved. Jim was like a brother to her and having to train a new senior producer? How horrifying, Mac thought.
Once the panel had finished, Mac sat in the silence of the auditorium while the college students dispersed. She had to be sure. If she was going to move, and make Jim move with her, then she had to be sure. After a few minutes, she was. It would be hard, but the show would become something they would all be proud of. Screw the ratings, Mac thought. The news is the news. It was time to accept Charlie Skinner's offer.
Mac left the theatre and called her driver. Once she was on her way back to the airport, she called Charlie.
"Charlie, this is Mackenzie McHale. I would like to accept the EP position for News Night at ACN. And I want to bring my own senior producer."
Mac hoped Charlie wouldn't hear the fear in her voice.
"You may need to bring more than just your senior producer. I want a new team for this. After Don and Elliott move to the later slot, I suspect many of Will's team will follow. He hasn't exactly been pleasant to be around these past few years."
Guilt ripped right through her body. Of course he hasn't been pleasant. I broke him. He's the love of my life and I broke him.
"I will make some calls and see who I can get."
"Great, I will call in a few days with more details. Thank you Mackenzie."
"Thank you, Charlie."
Mac hung up the phone and wondered how she could get Jim to agree to move to New York. She could play the sympathy card, but Jim doesn't know what happened with Will. She'd figure it out on the flight back to Washington.