Gee Whiz, It's Christmas

~.~

Uh, I wrote this in literally 45 minutes before work yesterday. Just a silly one-shot from the first Christmas with the gang, which we didn't get to see. I would say this is really the last thing I'm posting until I get back to town, but with this damn weather, we may not even make it out of town. Good for the updating, bad for our winter break plans….

The title is from the song by Carla Thomas. Not mine. And…I haven't said it in awhile, but the characters aren't mine, either.

~.~

Rachel sat on the end of the couch with a sigh, biting down bitterly on her snowman-shaped sugar cookie. She had wanted to tell Monica that her mom always decorated cut-out chocolate chip cookies instead of sugar cookies, but after the potato fiasco at Thanksgiving, decided against it. Though she was far from miserable spending Christmas Day with her new pseudo-family since her own family had decided to do Christmas the following weekend when both of her sisters would be back in town from college, she still missed being at home on Christmas. Even Paolo was spending Christmas with family there, and he was from an entirely other country.

"Present time!" Phoebe exclaimed, bouncing into the living room wearing a santa hat and carrying six presents, which she began handing out. "Ross," she handed the first small package to Ross, who was sitting in the chair. "Mon," she handed the next one to Monica, who was sitting on the floor in front of the couch. "Chandler," she handed Chandler, who was sitting on the nearest end of the couch his. "Joey," she handed Joey's package to Chandler to pass to Joey, who was seated beside him, before walking around to the other side of the coffee table. "Rach," she handed Rachel hers, "and me!" she finished, taking a seat on the side of the coffee table opposite the couch.

"Who goes first?" Joey bounced up and down excitedly, hoping she would say him. "Can I?"

"How is that fair?" Ross asked.

"Oh my god, how old are you guys?" Monica sighed.

"I know, I know!" Phoebe again took control. "Eeny, meeny, miny, mo," she said, pointed to each of them, "my dead mother said you are it," she ended, landing on Monica.

Monica smiled victoriously at Ross for a moment before pulling apart the staples at the top of the bag in front of her. "Let me guess, this is from one of the guys," she smirked.

"You can't guess, then it's not secret santa," Joey explained, rolling his eyes at her.

"Diet Coke and Pine-sol," Monica laughed, pulling both items out of the bag as she looked towards Joey and Chandler, trying to decide which of the two it was from.

"You're welcome," Chandler finally smiled.

"Thanks, Chandler," she laughed, patting him on the knee.

"Okay, my turn!" Ross said as he started tearing into his present, revealing an action figure sized dinosaur. "Huh."

"It's to go with your other toys," Phoebe explained, receiving a stern glare in return.

"They are not toys, they are genuine artifacts," he snapped back, causing Phoebe to shrug in response.

"Tomato, tomato," she smiled.

"Wait," Rachel interrupted. "So these aren't serious gifts?"

"No, it's secret santa," Joey laughed.

"Huh," Rachel leaned forward. "Be right back," she snatched the gift that was sitting on Chandler's lap, running into her room.

"Hey!" Chandler protested as she took his gift, but accepted the much smaller bag she returned with a moment later. "Huh."

"Okay, Phoebe's turn," Rachel clapped her hands, retaking her seat beside Joey on the couch.

Phoebe started removing the contents of her gift bag, naming them as she pulled them out. "Beer," she pulled out a beer bottle, "half a roll of scotch tape," she paused, "mistletoe," she continued, "and half a roll of toilet paper," she finished, setting the items on the table. "Oh, Joey, you shouldn't have," she smiled sincerely at him.

"Dude, that was our last roll of toilet paper," Chandler turned to Joey.

"Nu-uh, I grabbed some from the bathroom here earlier while Monica was getting dressed," Joey laughed.

"Hey," Monica leaned over, smacking Joey's leg and then Chandler's. "Do your own shopping!" Both boys mumbled something of an apology before turning to Rachel. "Your turn, Rach."

Rachel ripped off the wrapping paper, revealing a tin of cookies. "Mon, you made cookies just like my mom!" she gasped in surprise. "Cut-out chocolate chip cookies with sprinkles on top," she finished, on the verge of tears.

Monica shrugged. "I figured, since it's your first Christmas not at home, and I remembered your mom always making them when we were little…."

"Thank you so much," Rachel smiled, hugging the tin to her chest.

"Okay, enough of that, secret santa isn't supposed to be so mushy," Joey grabbed his present from the coffee table, ripping into it. "Yea, baby," he grinned, showing off the Playboy magazine. "Now that is what secret santa is all about," he turned to Rachel with a nod.

"You're welcome, Joe," Ross laughed. "And, last but not least," he turned to Chandler, who opened the small bag in front of him.

"Huh," he pulled out a box of condoms, looking inside to see if that's what the contents really were. "Rach, there's only like five in here…."

"Okay, I make like two dollars an hour," Rachel sighed.

"Plus tips," Chandler grumbled.

Rachel shook her head. "I'm not a very good waitress."

"Dude," Joey turned to him. "Why are you complaining? Five condoms will last you months," he laughed, receiving a glare in return. "Really, we should just switch," he handed the magazine to Chandler, taking the box of condoms from his hands. "Both gifts will get more use this way." Chandler opened his mouth to speak, but then conceded with a shrug, standing up to head to the kitchen to refill his glass of eggnog.

Rachel got her own glass of eggnog before moving to the seat beside the window, watching the scene in front of her as Ross moved beside Joey on the couch, Joey flipping through the Playboy in front of them. Phoebe bounced around the room, holding the mistletoe above her head every once in a while and receiving a kiss on the cheek from whichever boy was closest. Monica was cleaning up in the kitchen from their earlier dinner, before grabbing a glass of eggnog as well and heading over to the window by Rachel.

"Hey, guys, it's snowing!" she exclaimed as she stood beside Rachel.

"Ooh, let's go watch the snow!" Phoebe exclaimed, heading for the balcony, the boys not far behind.

"Come on, Rach," Monica grabbed at her arm, and Rachel followed the other five outside.

Deck the halls with boughs of holly! The sound of what sounded like intoxicated girls came from one of the balconies below them, and the three boys leaned over, trying to figure out where it was coming from. Rachel smiled, watching the snow begin to cover the city, the girls below them still singing. By this time, the guys had drank enough eggnog that joining in sounded like a good idea, so they were now singing along as they leaned over the edge of the balcony, trying to get the attention of the girls below them.

"Don't ya just love Christmas in the city?" Phoebe wrapped her arms around herself as she leaned beside Rachel, looking out over the snow-covered streets below and Christmas lights that littered random balconies and windows around them.

Rachel smiled; maybe she could get used to Christmas in the city after all. "Yea," she smiled genuinely after a moment, before turning to face Phoebe. "Yea, I do."

~.~

I realize that Rachel never likes her presents, but it was baked goods, not store bought, so…yea. I know someone would comment on that if I didn't. Anyway, review, please and thanks.

Merry Christmas :)