Possibility
It was actually a very rare thing, seeing her angry. But now, seeing that little frown on her face, her thin lips slightly parted, eyes wandering outside the glass, he could tell that.
Aeris was angry - and disappointed.
On the other hand, he didn't feel like talking, too. There was something utterly uncomfortable with the whole situation. Everything, in that oppressing sitting place on the back of the ShinRa helicopter, was screaming betrayer to him. He had got used to that word from many years, but affirming that it didn't hurt anymore was a lie. He had betrayed his country when he was only eighteen. A Wutainese working for ShinRa during the war - what a shame. He had betrayed himself, living a more than glamorous life during the past years, wasting away all his money as if he thought he didn't deserve to have it. Irony of fate, money had just kept coming, especially since they had made him the boss of the Turks, due to his devotion for work and his serious attitude. Because at least he was trying to prove himself he didn't come to ShinRa for nothing.
What was he doing now? He was committing the last of his crimes' list. Betraying Aeris.
You'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs
The radio the helicopter pilot was listening to played low, but not low enough not to be heard by him. That singer sounded broken and angry at the same time, shrill but melodic voice.
Tseng stared at Aeris quite intensively. Not very surprisingly, she noticed it, and looked back at him. Her huge emerald eyes - they looked the same - always the same. Years had passed, but they had not changed. He was the one who couldn't stand eye contact any longer. He turned away, his jet black shiny hair sliding on his navy blue uniform, his refined chin resting on bony and pale fingers. Betrayer of Wutai - did it hurt? Aeris' eyes undoubtedly hurt.
Some people want to fill the world with silly love songs
Oh, it had been stupid. Very stupid and unprofessional indeed, in a society where professionalism counted as much as lack of morality. He had though about Aeris, sometimes. Not as the one he had to capture, not as the specimen Hojo craved for. Just as a heartbreaking girl he might have been infatuated with.
But he knew what he was supposed to do - she knew what he was supposed to do. And it didn't matter how long he had managed to postpone it. Now it was done. He had captured her. He had betrayed her.
Love makes us act like we are fools, throw our lives away for one happy day
Now it was too late even to imagine - as he used to do - his usual annoying what ifs. What if he hadn't been a Turk, what if she hadn't been so scientifically interesting, what if they had met outside Midgar - could it have been possible? Could he have had an imaginary possibility with Aeris? They could have been a Wutainese war hero and his fiance, marrying in a faraway land, among flower's petal, kimonos, exotic animals - why not. Instead, they were the boss of the Turk and a poor flower girl, sitting in a squalid helicopter, heading towards her future jail. Surely he had not thrown his life away for his stupid dream. Probably - most likely - he had never even given it a try.
No.
Thought she probably didn't hate him - though he didn't even disgust her, since their shoulders were touching even if there would have been enough room to avoid it - though she could have probably forgiven him, if only he had really wanted to be forgiven - though probably he could have done something, even in that situation, to comfort her - a hand on her shoulder, anything - that all didn't count.
Right there, right in that moment, Tseng felt he didn't deserve that possibility.
Author'sNotes: Aeris/Tseng is not something I would usually write, but since all couples look the same to me, here it is. I know people get annoyed with wrong pairings, but I couldn't help it. Oh, and my beta didn't check this, so it will be full of mistakes hehe. I'm not even asking for review because I have the bad feeling none will like this ehehe...I just needed to get a break from 'Subservience' because I was getting angsty about it ... I'll return to that eventually.
Swamp-Eyes
Desclaimer: I don't know whose's the song... surely it's not mine lol. Nicole Kidman sings in in Moulin Rouge XP