Disclaimer: I don't own the Selection Trilogy, even though I wish, because it is such a cool series!

Deceived

I wonder how two people can be close one minute and be parted by a great distance the next. As I woke up the next morning, my mood shifted. I can tell that today will be awful.

It has been two weeks now. No one had been eliminated by Maxon, and so far I had been excluded from everything. The weight on my shoulders increased as the King gave me more harder challenges than the other Elite. I now spend all my time studying and completing challenges that no other Elite seem to be given. Lucky me.

I have tried tugging my ear, but all of Maxon's attention seemed to be divided with the other three girls, especially Kriss. As the days passed by, I could see a change in her. Kriss is now more confident and seemed to have matured more. But not for the better. I don't think Maxon can see it.

Queen Amberley would give my sympathetic looks, and I started to seclude myself from everyone. Maxon said he'd try, but I haven't even spoken one word to him, or him to I. Is it possible to say that I wished I'd never shown Maxon the true extent of my feelings towards him? I now feel embarrassed and made fun of. It makes me wonder if what he said to me was ever true.

Mary, Anne and Lucy walked in, surprised to see that I had woken up and didn't need to be, this morning. The first week I was my normal self. By the second, I became a whole other person. They could tell that my mood was sour. So they worked on me in silence. They took breakfast to me and I realised then that I need to call Nicolette for help.

After breakfast, it tasted blend to me, I walked over to Sylvia's office. This mess I created for myself grew even more. Passing by unused rooms, someone grabbed my arms and pulled me into one. I tried to scream for help but the culprit had covered my mouth with his hand. He or she turned me around and I realised that it was Aspen.

His mask was gone, his green eyes stared at me with accusations, I could tell that he was about to question me with harsh tones. I took it upon myself to answer him before he became to rash.

"I know, I thought I was going home too. Trust me I did. But he gave me another chance, Aspen. I want to take it upon myself to try. I want to do something for me...It might be out of my reach, but you and Dad have taught me to be something, make something of myself."

"You weren't suppose to come back, Mer! You were supposed to go home and wait for me! It's been two weeks since then, you haven't even tried to sought me out. You've been ignoring me! Who are you trying to fool, anyway? You are not princess material. The way you handled the report-"

"Dont bring that up! Aspen Ledger! You listen to me, and listen to me good! I will not give up in this competition, I've grown feelings for Maxon, he isn't what you think he is. I know that now. If there is any other reason to leave our possible future together, it's that you don't believe in me, that I could be Princess of this country or anything other than being a five!"

Whispered words can be intimate, but these whispers were any other. Spite was exchanged and as I turned my back to him, I could feel that piece of my heart, letting him go. Angry tears and tears of regret cascaded down my cheeks. His hand tried to grab onto mine, but I fled away from him towards my room. Sylvia was long forgotten now.

What made it worse, was the sight before me as I passed through the double-doors towards the gardens. Kriss and Maxon sitting in our bench; laughing, talking, giving each other tender caresses.

I collapsed on my bed, my violet day gown crumpled around my broken convulsing body. I was tired and I needed to bring myself out of this inescapable depression, quickly. I knew at that moment that I would never be free from it, unless my Maxon was back.

My disguise was falling. My happy and carefree façade was crumbling all around me. What I had the first day of my almost elimination, had been wasted away from the loneliness. My maids had tried to help, I didn't let them. The old America is drowning in a sea of tears. I tried gaining back Maxon's trust, but a relationship needs both people for it to work.

My crying stopped, and I lay passive without thought. I was losing myself. No wonder Maxon didn't act towards me like the others. Maybe Aspen was right. I should go. I've tried for more than necessary, taking a big portion of my life. Kriss might be in no other words, a bitch now, but if she makes Maxon happy...I better let him go.

My hopes up and my real self scattered, Maxon will forever hold my real love. However brief it had been.

I sat down in my chair, grasping onto my pen. What I had written, I hoped explained all of who I was to Maxon. Grasping so bad onto the pen that would finish me in this competition once let go: I didn't want to let go.

I finally did.

Ringing up my maids for the last time, I said my goodbyes to them. Giving them my gratitude for all they had done for me. I had given them a note for them to give to Sylvia and the Queen. One for the Italian royal family to be sent out, and one for Aspen - telling him that it would have never worked out between us, (us being so different than each other), and saying how sorry I was for all the heartache I've caused.

As I reached the palace entrance doors, King Clarkson caught up with me.

"I'm glad you had come to your senses, Lady America. Kriss will make a lovely queen, don't you think?" His mocking tone saddened me further. He left me at the steps as I went into the awaiting vehicle, that would take me to the Los Angeles Airport.

Looking backwards through the tinted windows, I didn't see Maxon rushing through to stop me like I anticipated. A tear fell down my cheek.

When Maxon Schreave reached his room that night, three maids were waiting for him outside his door. He remembered them as Mary, Ann and Lucy. America's maids.

They had solemn expressions on their faces. I wonder what happened. Did it have anything to do with America? I wonder if Kriss has given her all those notes I've asked her to give to America. Kriss is pretty honest, I hope America didn't think I abandoned her. Clarkson had threatened to kill her if I spent another time with her during the Selection, so I planned on asking her to marry me through the notes. Then I won't actually be spending time with her during this competition, but I sure will afterwards, when it ends.

I've told Kriss about my plan, she understands. She's the one who gave me the ides for the notes. When the maids told me America left, I ripped the letter out of the youngest maid's hand. I quickly read it and my heart broke.

The girl I love, was now ruined and out of my grasp. She didn't get anything from me. Meaning Kriss never gave her my notes.

Damn it. I thought Kriss would be honest to me. I rushed out of the palace doors just in time to see America leave the gates. Calling a car to me, I drove and sped towards the airport.

When I went to gate 2 to catch America, I found her climbing up the steps towards the plane. I ran to her. I called her name. It was as if she didn't want to believe that I was really behind her. I was too slow and they closed the plane door.

A plane radio telecommunication's person, rushed towards me as I fell to my knees. The plane took off and I cried. I demanded that I would be on the next plane to Carolina. He complied. I just hope that America will allow me to pick up the pieces of what she said to be her broken heart.