Peter lay chained to the bed with the car battery still attached to his eyebrows, his kidnapper stood over him. His memories of the past 24 hours was hazy, he'd walked in on Walter and Gene and on his way to the bathroom to vomit he'd been grabbed by a strange woman who'd dragged him to her house and read him a long, nonsensical essay about how she loved him. Not his worst evening this week but still quite mentally jarring. His ear also really itched.
There was a light knock on the door. The insane woman was just about to open the door when Astrid punched through it, passing through the wooden door and continuing through the woman's face. She miraculously survived until Astrid stamped on her ovaries and she bled to death.
"What the hell is going on? And why is Peter Bishop naked in my living room?" said Agent Jessup as she walked in from the next room. "Did you not hear me screaming?" replied Peter, drawing attention to the glaring plothole I refuse to explain. "Would anyone like any apple pie while I'm here? I came to deliver some to Amy when I saw another fucking LotS fan in her living room. You should really install an alarm." said Astrid, turning to Agent Jessup. It was just then that Ron Weasley and Olivia appeared at the door, astride a mildly aroused Gene the cow. "I CAN TALK. I'M ALSO A COW" said Ron, no one knew why. Olivia then took off what little clothing she was wearing and jumped onto Astrid.
In Agent Jessup's bathroom September and December were just waking up. September was in the bath and December was in the other bath. They's been hidden out here since the rest of the Observer months had been turned into June by Valerie Boone once she had realised that her powers didn't just apply to March. September put on his hat and looked out the window just as a drug addled woman with brigh blue eyes jumped through it, pinning him to the ground. Suddenly December grabbed his own face and pulled it off, revealing himself as Scarlie. Scarlie shouted "SLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!" as he kicked Valerie Boone's head off. "I have something to tell you. I'm actually Charlie" and September tore off his mask too as Charlie and Scarlie walked together into the living room to join in the orgy which had began while I was writing bullshit about Valerie Boone.
Across the road looking through his window was Broyles, looking through binoculars. "What the fuck is going on over there?" he exclaimed. He then realised he lived alone because his wife left him in this universe and took off his trousers to continue watching and wanking.