Magnus was seated in his office, his eyebrows furrowed, and the corners of his mouth were forming a tight line. He was staring at a page of an ancient book, while his hand was fiddling with a glittery quill. He tried, he really did try to concentrate on translating the ancient spellbook required for his job with a client the day after tomorrow, but his mind wandered somewhere else.

He sighed and looked at an empty black leather couch placed at the corner of his office—Alec's couch. Usually Alec would just sit there reading some books while he waited for Magnus to finish his works, sometimes would brew him some coffee, or stole glances and smiled at Magnus during his reading sessions. But he's not there now.

Magnus chewed his lower lip and placed the quill next to the open spellbook, his long and slender manicured fingers were drumming on the hard oak surface. He moved one hand to his forehead, massaging the tensions that have been building up in his mind for the past three hours.

They had a fight, again.

Magnus pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed out loud. He cannot continue his work in this chaotic state of mind, so he snapped his fingers and the mountain of books and papers scattered across his desk disappeared within a second.

-three hours ago-

"Hey Mags." Alec entered Magnus' study and walked toward him.

"Alexander..." Magnus looked up and smiled as Alec bowed down to give him a kiss on the forehead, the soft end of his dangling blue scarf tickling Magnus' collarbone.

Alec had finished his meeting at the institute and went straight to Magnus' loft as soon as it's done. It's rare for him to be able to leave this early, considering the whole shadow world ordeal going on around them, not to mention the chaos Sebastian had brought down on the Clave and the Downworld.

"Guess I'm interrupting your work..." Alec murmured as he eyed the thick hard covered books with yellowed pages sprawled across the desk.

"Not really," said Magnus as he intertwined his free hand with Alec's. He noticed the coldness on Alec's palm and furrowed his brows. "Why weren't you wearing any gloves? Your hand is freezing!"

Alec looked down on his hands as if he just realized that himself then looked at Magnus and shrugged. "I left the institute in a hurry."

Magnus raised an eyebrow at him like a scolding parent would and Alec shrugged again.

"What? I just want to see you as soon as possible! Something wrong with that?" Alec said in defense and Magnus smiled.

"No, not at all, far from it... Just remember to wear them next time. You know how cold it is out there." Magnus said as Alec went for the coat hanger at the corner of the room.

"Alright dad," Alec said jokingly as he slipped off his leather jacked and blue scarf, hanging them gingerly on the coat hanger.

Magnus smiled contently at Alec's comfortableness of being in his loft, which he called home now.

The thought of Alec not being here with him in years from now crushed his smile and he shook the thought away. He clenched his jaw tightly and tried to get back to his work as Alec walked out of his study to brew them some coffee.

xOxOx

Moments later, Magnus' focus was back to his work, when Alec placed a cup of coffee with puffs of steam emerging from it on the desk, careful not to spill the coffee on the books that seemed older than his ancestors.

Magnus gave him a thankful smile and took a sip from the glittery cup, the one that Alec had ordered for him.

Alec returned the smile and was about to went for his couch when he noticed something out of the corner of his eyes, the Book of the White. It was almost buried under the mountains of books on the desk, but failed to escape Alec's eyes.

Something clicked in Alec's mind and he couldn't stop the words from flowing out of his mouth when he noticed a few bookmarks peeking out from the book.

"The Book of the White," he suddenly said. "Why did you want it so badly?"

Magnus looked at Alec, surprised yet confused for the sudden question. He eyed the book and carefully said, "You know why, it's a very powerful spellbook."

"But you wanted it for something specific, didn't you? For a specific spell?" Alec insisted as he placed his mug on the desk, looking at Magnus in the eyes.

Magnus' furrowed his eyebrows and gently placed his mug on the desk as well, then a realization dawned on him.

Oh crap...

He couldn't find a way to explain his research on that book to Alec. It's not that he would use that spell anyway, not with Alec's consent, not without ruining the only person he love so much in this world's life. He just did the research to improve his magic skills; at least he tried to think of it that way.

"Was it a spell for making me immortal?" Alec asked in a small voice, his piercing blue eyes stared into Magnus' glamoured ones.

"No. No, It's not—I wouldn't do that." Magnus said, more like whispered, his voice was shaky and his eyes went wide.

"Why not?" Alec exclaimed. "If you could have me with you forever, wouldn't you want to?" he wasn't sure why he raised his voice.

"Of course I would!" Magnus almost shouted, not even realizing he had already stood up, facing Alec. "You just don't understand Alexander," Magnus sighed, lowering his voice. "The price for being immortal, it's—"

"You don't get to decide whether I can handle that or not!" Alec raised his voice again, a voice at the back of his mind was begging him to stop, stop yelling at the man he love so much, but he couldn't stop. His worries and doubts were getting the best of him.

"You could handle that! No, you can! You're still here!" Alec was breathing heavily from all the yelling, he mentally punched himself when he noticed the tears pooling in Magnus' eyes.

Alec huffed, pissed at himself for ruining his time with Magnus, which he could barely have when the institute always got him on duty calls.

Alec reached out his hands and cupped Magnus' face, wiping a line of tears straying out of his beautiful eyes. He did this. He made Magnus, his boyfriend, cry. Alec wanted to punch himself right in the face.

"I'm sorry..." Alec whispered and leaned his forehead down against Magnus'.

Magnus didn't say anything, just leaned into Alec's touch.

"I'm so sorry..." Alec repeated, he then let go of Magnus. He went out of the study and to the front door, out of the loft; he needed to clear his thoughts.

-back to present time-

Magnus let his gaze roamed across his study, his eyes widened when he noticed Alec's leather jacket and scarf still hanging on the coat hanger. It's autumn, and God knows how cold it is out there in this time of year. How could Alec have left without any extra layer? It's been three hours since he left the loft, he could get sick, Magnus thought to himself.

Magnus shook his head as he got up from the desk to grab the clothing and leave the loft in a hurry.

-End of Part 1-