Backfire
"You're slowing down in your old age, Raphie!" Mikey called out, running backwards as he taunted his older brother.
"We're practically the same age, shell for brains," Raph growled at him, secretly admiring Mikey's incredible athleticism. How did he always manage to make everything look so easy?
"I'm younger and I'm better looking," Mikey insisted, sounding completely insufferable.
"You're also gonna get splattered if ya' don't pay attention to where you're going," Raph called out. "How the heck are ya' supposed to see where they went?"
"I'm watching our back trail," Mikey told him. "They might be leading us into a trap, have you thought of that?"
The pair of brightly banded turtles were running down the center of a darkened street in a mostly deserted section of the city. What had started out as a friendly game of ninja tag had quickly changed at the sound of a burglar alarm going off nearby.
Upon further investigation, they'd spotted a trio of Purple Dragons stealing the items contained in a pawn shop display window, broken glass covering the sidewalk.
Raph's shout had made them bolt, dropping their ill-gotten gains as they fled. As fleet footed as the pair of ninjas were, the three hoods were faster, sprinting from sight in record time.
The odds that three Purple Dragons would be that fast or travel in a group together were astronomical enough to cause Raph some misgivings.
"Slow down, Mike," Raph called, dropping from a run to a jog. "Trap is exactly what I'm thinking."
It wasn't just the tone of his voice that sobered the younger turtle, it was also that his brother had called him 'Mike'. He spun around in mid-stride, hands automatically going for the nunchucks in his belt.
They both surveyed the street, noting quickly that there was no sign of life anywhere.
"Might have a better view from the roof top," Mikey suggested in a hushed voice, all trace of playfulness gone from his demeanor. His eyes flitted from place to place rapidly, as though he was trying to see in all directions at once.
The pair of turtles had slowed to a walk, simultaneously leaving the openness of the street in favor of the shadows thrown by empty buildings onto the sidewalk.
"Yeah, maybe," Raph said distractedly, although he didn't move in that direction.
A loud clang from nearby made Mikey shriek, the sound cut off partway by Raph's calloused hand on his mouth. When Raph lifted his hand away, Mikey said, "Kind of empty out here, don't you think? Maybe they got eaten!"
"They didn't get eaten," Raph said, though he admitted to himself that the silence was a little unnerving.
"Then where did they go?" Mikey asked.
"We're right here freaks!"
The Turtles whirled around to see Hun standing in the center of the street. There were a half dozen of his men around him and scores more popped out of the buildings around the pair.
"Told you," Mikey said. "Trap."
"Can it," Raph muttered.
"I knew that burglary would draw at least one of you out of hiding, but this is a bonus," Hun said triumphantly. "Now I get to pulverize two of you and cut your numbers in half . . . ."
Mikey leaned towards Raph and whispered, "Wanna hear any more of this?"
"Nope," Raph answered, springing for the nearest Dragon while Hun was still talking.
One punch put the startled man on the ground and then Raph's sai were in his hands. Behind him he heard Mikey's nunchucks singing and his brother's voice, taunting their attackers into doing something stupid. Enraged by his words, they fell right into his trap, plunging towards him so angry that they forgot to be cautious.
Raph loved fighting next to Mikey because his brother was crazy dangerous when properly motivated. Together they were a formidable force, but they were only two and even in a battle frenzy Raph could see that the sheer volume of their enemies was going to be overwhelming damn soon.
Then it became obvious they were being herded towards Hun, who stood there grinning and cracking his knuckles. Raph wanted nothing more than to wipe that smirk off of Hun's face and was headed straight towards the man when a streak of orange blew by him.
"Cowabunga!" Mikey yelled, leaping skyward to springboard off the back of a nearby Purple Dragon.
His high flying acrobatics sent him soaring over Hun's head to land directly behind the giant. With a look of pure devilment, Mikey grabbed Hun's waistband and yanked his pants down around his ankles.
All fighting came to a screeching halt as every single Dragon stopped to stare at their boss, who stood frozen in place, his face a complete blank. The fact that he went commando lent an air of ludicrous unreality to the scene.
"Raph come on!" Mikey yelled, halfway down the street, unfazed by his own antics.
Snapping out of his shock, Raph raced past Hun who had just started to bend down and retrieve his pants. Unable to resist, Raph delivered a resounding smack to Hun's buttocks with the handle of his sai.
Hun's outraged bellow followed the turtle brothers into the sewers. Laughing hard enough to bring tears to their eyes, the pair raced towards their home, not stopping until they'd put a couple of miles between them and the attempted ambush.
Inside one of the tunnels, Raph and Mikey listened for sounds of pursuit. When it was obvious none was forthcoming, Raph turned towards his brother.
"Ya' pantsed Hun," Raph stated incredulously.
"Yeah," Mikey replied with a broad grin. "I guess his ambush backfired."
"I can't believe ya' pantsed Hun," Raph repeated, staring at Mikey in amazement. "Ya' know he's gonna try to get ya' back for that."
"What's he gonna do, yank my pants down?" Mikey asked. "I don't wear any."
Pumped up on adrenaline, Raph pulled Mikey up against him and aggressively took possession of his mouth. After a couple of minutes he released his brother, their lips separating with a resounding pop.
"Let's go someplace more private and let me show ya' how glad I am ya' don't wear pants," Raph suggested lasciviously.
"Best idea you've had all night," Mikey agreed with bubbling enthusiasm, bouncing along beside his lover with the unlimited energy that Raph enjoyed so much.