I didn't know what to do. I was torn. In England there was Max. The one I loved when I thought I had no one left in the world. No one to care for me and love me. After all, I had turned my back on everything I was familiar with. Sam, Jessica, Enid (or should I say Alex?!), Tom, Todd, my parents. Everyone. I thought back to that day at O'Hare airport and had to bite back the tears thinking how lonely and isolated I had felt. Not only had my sister and boyfriend betrayed me (so I thought) but my parents had refused to accept that I may have had a valid reason for leaving Jessica. I didn't even get the chance to tell them that I didn't know Jess had no money and had broken her leg-they wouldn't even listen and that is what really hurt.
I cried all my way to London. Thinking back, I feel really sorry for the poor people I met on the way. And then when I arrived in London I realised I had not sent my scholarship acceptance papers back- maybe my parents were right and I was more like Jess than I thought! So I had nowhere to go, no money and nowhere to sleep. And I needed to sleep. I can barely remember the feelings I had when I saw the lights of Max's house beckoning to me in the dark. I soon learned to swallow my pride and realised that I had much to learn in my new role. Me, Liz, an award winning student journalist, did not have a clue when it came to preparing dinners and clearing up after the next best thing to English royalty.
I had fallen in love with Max almost as soon as I met him. I had sworn to myself, after Sam, that that would be it. No more "in love" for Liz. And to a certain extent I found it hard to justify what I was blaming Jess for given what I was doing to Lavinia. But the upshot of it all was that I loved Max and gave him what I had treasured most. I had refused to sleep with Todd because I didn't feel ready. I was working up to having sex with Tom but the discovery of Dana-linked condoms put an end to that one! I was almost ready to sleep with Sam before I realised what he was really like. Many people seem to think I did sleep with Conner but I have to admit at this stage that sleeping is all we ever did. So Max was my first. So far, my first, my last, my everything.
So I can honestly say I have never loved and committed myself to anyone as much as Max. He is my life, my lover. He split up with Lavina for me. A week ago, this would have been all that I could have wanted. That was before Jessica arrived and begged me to leave London and go back home.
And now I have to make the biggest decision of my life.