A/N: There are two authors of this fic, and we hope you enjoy reading it as much as we enjoyed writing it. This first chapter is written from the perspective of James Potter.

'BLACK!' I bellow up the stairs. 'GET YOUR ARSE IN GEAR BEFORE I COME UP THERE AND DO IT FOR YOU!"

I check my watch impatiently. Sirius, forever eager yet never punctual, is still faffing around upstairs.

'You keep away from my backside, Potter,' comes the reply as Sirius glides down the banister clutching a bright yellow bucket that seems to be emitting some fairly ominous sounds. Remus comes hurrying down the stairs soon after, closely followed by Peter who almost tumbles head-first into the Common Room with enthusiasm.

Sirius grins at me, his eyes twinkling with mischief. It's a good job there's not too many girls present at this current time, because I think Sirius could have knocked them out at this point.

'Phase One is in motion. So meet you at the Slytherin Common Room?'

I nod at him and return the grin. 'Two minutes.'

Sirius practically bounces off out of the portrait hole.

'Boo!' I say, jumping out from behind the corner.

Snape lets out a squeal.

Peter giggles. Remus is much more subtle about his laughter, choosing to express his glee through taking a bit of his everlasting chocolate bar. I know him too well.

Looking rather red in the face, Snape whips out his wand.

'Get out of my way, Potter.'

'Erm… Nah, I don't feel like it.'

'I said, get out of my way,' Snape repeats with added menace.

'Don't ruin the fun, Snivellus!' I lean casually on one of the many statues, which moves for my convenience.

'Oh yes, I'm having such a wonderful time,' Snape sneers. 'Move, Potter.'

'Don't make me fork you to death here and now,' I sigh dramatically, miming the prodding of Snape with a suitably pointed piece of cutlery. I'm a pretty good actor, if I say so myself.

'I'd cut your heart out with a spoon, Potter,' he spits at me.

I carefully wipe the saliva from my eyes.

'A little less spray would be appreciated next time, Snivellus. I already had a shower this morning.'

'Unlike some,' sniggers Peter.

Snape opens his mouth, evidently trying to form an appropriately sardonic riposte, but nothing comes out and he is left standing there gaping like a great big tuna.

I smile triumphantly and nod at the ceiling.

Snape gives me a funny look and looks up to see what I'm nodding at.

'NOW!' I yell, and the yellow bucket, which had, until now, been keeping quiet in Sirius's arms as he stood - surprisingly just as quietly - waiting on the balcony, tips upside-down onto Snape's head and explodes with colourful sparks. The miniature fireworks pop and hiss as they entwine themselves in Snape's hair.

Snape shrieks.

The portraits on the walls watch with mild interest as he runs the length of corridor, screaming, with his head on fire and his arms flailing wildly just like in all the cartoons. Remus attempts to stifle a laugh, but his mouth is so full of chocolate, he unfortunately begins to choke instead.

'You have no idea how much willpower it took for me to stand directly above Snivellus' head, armed with a bucket of fireworks, and not drop it on him,' says Sirius.

'Worth the wait though, right?' I grin at him.

Sirius simply gives a gleeful cackle in response. Remus continues to choke. Peter is running away from a stray Catherine wheel that somehow managed to detach itself from Snape's greasy head.

'Don't let it touch you, Pete!' Sirius calls after him. 'It might infect you with the Permanent Greasing Charm that Snape seems to have been eternally cursed with.'

'Permanent Greasing Charm… Now there's a prank even we haven't tried yet,' I say thoughtfully. 'Lads, I think we've just found our Phase Two.'