Secret Santa
Author- GreenGreenGreen.
Spoilers- none.
Pairings- sort of none (for now).
A/N- hello readers, I don't know if any one has ever done a House story like this before- but if they have I hope mine is different enough to make it interesting. Any reviews would be wonderful, even criticism (I'm a big girl, I can take it). I will never get better if I don't know what I'm doing right or wrong. Enjoy this piece of mindless escapism.
"A what?" asked House, pausing on his journey down to the Princeton Plainsboro cafeteria.
"A secret Santa!" replied Wilson, flashing House his trademark boyish grin. House turned so he was facing his best friend more directly and put on one of his many variations on the 'God the people around me are morons' faces- that boyish charm may work on the nurses but it wouldn't work on him.
" And WHY am I involved.?"
"I put your name in," said Wilson. "it's Christmas, it's fun. See what happens is every one picks a name and-"
"I KNOW what a secret Santa is Wilson, what I'm wondering is why I have to participate. I think I've already got my quota of bath salt and scented candles, I really don't need any more."
"come on House, every one else from your department is doing it-"
"Wilson there are THREE other people in my department, that's not exactly a-"
"Plus I've already put your name in and got your person." Interrupted Wilson. "you can't back out now, it messes up the whole game." He gave House a self satisfied smile.
House sighed and continued to walk to the cafeteria. It's not that he minded the idea of a secret Santa per se- well no, actually he did. Why the hell would he want to spend his money on a piece of crap present for some one else when he could use it for more important things like booze or naughty magazines. He opened his mouth to tell Wilson this when he caught sight of Wilson's expression and changed his mind. A smug Wilson was not to be trifled with.
"So who did I get then?" asked House.
"I don't know, it's a secret. That is actually why it's called a SECRET Santa." Wilson replied. "Here." He handed House a slip of paper as they joined the queue. House pocketed it without looking at the name.
"So who else is doing this, I hope I don't have to think about what would lift the spirits and warm the heart of Patty the third floor cleaner."
"No, no." Said Wilson. "It's just you and me, obviously, and Cameron, Foreman, Chase and Cuddy."
"Hmmmmmmmrrrr" House growled non-committedly in the back of his throat as he looked at the food. Wilson took it as a good sign. He didn't mention to House that his attempts to get some of the nurses involved in the secret Santa had been met with suspicious queries of "is House involved?" Still, Wilson thought happily to himself, at least House agreed. It was mainly because of House that Wilson had decided to do a secret Santa in the first place, House was much more likely to get involved in the tradition of yuletide gift giving if he only had to buy for one person. He put his hand in his pocket and felt the scrap of paper there. What would Cameron like for Christmas?
Cameron sat at the big desk in the diagnostic department's larger office, a pile of unsorted mail next to her. Before she started discarding all the offers to speak at conferences that weren't in tropical areas she unfolded the small piece of paper that contained the name of her secret Santa. Damn, she thought, she had read it correctly. The one word scribbled on the paper stared back at her. HOUSE.
That afternoon Foreman hit the shops. The secret Santa was set for two days before Christmas, before he and Chase left for the holidays. That was two weeks away, but Foreman knew exactly what he was going to buy. As soon as Foreman had opened his piece of paper and read CHASE his mind had flashed to the tiny store hidden away between a large shoe store and a Levis factory outlet not too far from his flat. A very light dusting of snow began to fall as Foreman entered the shop packed to the rafters with all things science fiction. Now, he wondered, what would Chase like?
Lisa Cuddy also knew what she was going to buy, and being the organized person she was, she also decided to get in early. Wilson would love this, she thought as a surly teenage sales assistant bagged her purchase, men never had enough and really they were so lovely… Cuddy exited the shop and made her way to her car, her shoes crunching softly on the snow.
Two days later House was searching through the pockets of all his clothes. Stupid secret Santa. Wilson had asked him today if he knew what he was getting his person, reminding House about the fact that he had a "person" at all. Aha! He thought a his long fingers felt a crushed scrap of paper. He removed it and smoothed it out. FOREMAN. Geez, thought House. Oh well, at least it was easier that Cuddy.
Cuddy, Cuddy, Cuddy. Chase repeated in his head. Oh, God why did he have to get her? It was the day before the secret Santa was meant to be held and Chase was yet to buy his present. Chase had many years experience with purchasing gifts for women, but usually they were aimed at getting the said women to go out with him. What do yo buy your boss as a platonic Christmas gift? He wondered. Why couldn't he have gotten Foreman? Chase let his eyes wander over the shop fronts….. hmmm, he thought, maybe…
At 4:45, two days before Christmas, a small group of people were gathered around the table in the diagnostic department. In front of them on the table lay a small pile of gifts, each with a name tag bearing only the name of the recipient.
"well, dig in," said Wilson, and everyone reached for their respective gifts. Wilson was feeling slightly nervous. He had been pestering House for the last week or so, trying to determine what he had bought his secret Santa, but House had refused to comply. He hoped House hadn't gotten Cuddy… oh the horrible possibilities. Why hadn't he thought of this before? Damn Christmas spirit, thought Wilson as he reached for the neatly wrapped gift bearing his name.
"Oh great!" Wilson exclaimed. "Bath gel, and candles… Lemon flavoured!"
House caught Wilson's eye as he smirked. Bath gel… hee hee… oh God he better not have gotten that too, or he wouldn't be as tactful as Wilson. Oh no, his gift was much flatter, not much bigger that a Christmas card…
"Fantastic!" Cuddy said happily. "Bath salts and candles… vanilla flavoured too, my favourite!" Chase smirked and mentally patted himself on the back as he turned his attention to his own gift wrapped in reindeer patterned paper. He pulled back the wrapping to reveal.
"Brilliant!" He said, holding up the limited edition framed Doctor Who poster. He'd have to take it down whenever he had a girl over, but this was going right over his bed… fantastic.
Good choice, Foreman said to himself as he looked at the grinning Australian. He looked at the table at the diminishing pile of presents. Ooo! His was the big one. Foreman ripped the paper of the box and opened it to find… another box, which he opened to find… another box. This continued until Foreman was left with a pile of boxes and a sheet of paper. It was a conformation of a two year subscription to the bi monthly Journal of Neuroscience in North America. Foreman was puzzled. From the trick with the boxes he assumed his secret Santa was House, but the gift was surprisingly thoughtful… oh well, he was happy anyway.
Cameron tore open the silver envelope that had her name on it, along with a stick on red ribbon. She reached inside and pulled out two small pieces of paper. "Awesome- I really wanted these!" she exclaimed as she looked at the two tickets to the jazz festival that was coming to New Jersey in the new year. But as she smiled, Cameron felt a quiver of uneasiness inside. Everyone else, for the most part, had received really good presents. Would he like hers? What Cameron had decided on for House wasn't exactly the normal present you got your boss for Christmas… still he wouldn't know it was her that got it. Well yeah, she said to herself, otherwise you would have got him some nice scented candles…
House pulled open his envelope. Inside was a Christmas card with a picture of a Christmas tree on it. He flipped open the card and read the message inside.
Dear House.
Be at your apartment at 8pm tonight.
Have a merry Christmas.
House was taken aback. This was mystery he hadn't expected from a simple secret Santa. Still, 8 o'clock was starting to look much more exiting than it had that morning- all he had been planning to do was get drunk and watch the L-Word.
That night House lay stretched out on his couch, TV on. He checked his watch, 7:55. House's feeling were on a rollercoaster. He was excited… no, he wasn't… yes he was… no he wasn't, he hated Christmas and knowing the people he worked with the present would be stupid… but he was a little bit excit-
The sound of the doorbell interrupted House's thoughts.
He grabbed his cane and limped over to the door and revealed a red head standing on his doorway wearing lots of makeup and a trench coat.
"Hi, I'm Tawney, you must be House," she said.
"ye-es" House replied apprehensively, but stood aside as Tawney made to move inside.
"Just sit down," Tawney said huskily as she turned of the TV and smiled at him. House was about to question her when Tawney took a CD from her pocket and dropped the trench coat. That made House sit down.
As Tawney put on her CD and began to bump and grind to the music, the sequins on her underwear sparkling, House mused that this may indeed be a very merry Christmas.
A/N. well that's it. I was thinking about what someone like House might like for Christmas and what else- a stripper. I also like the idea that it was Cameron who hired it for him. Originally this story was going to be a lot more Cam/House focuses but it ended up sort of not being. However if you lovely readers review and say you would like a sequel then anything is possible. Thanks for reading and I hope you liked it.