Had I even the right to cry? As I stood upon the second murder scene of the day, my eyes shifting from one death to the next. They had stood little more chance than the younglings in the temple had done. Oh god, the horrifying memory.
It wasn't I, it wasn't I! Please believe me when I say I did not slaughter anyone today, but myself perhaps. I did not struck at underdeveloped bodies, flesh younger than mine was when I first set foot into the temple. I did not kill them, end their hearts that had not yet beat for anyone but themselves. I did not rid them of families. I did not hurt loved ones, cherished ones. It wasn't I… I did not do such things!
Master, where are you? I think I need you more than I ever did, but I will deny it once my eyes meet yours, know that. I don't believe any memory of you and I can ever manage a smile on my face again. Please, help me. Rid me of this awful nightmare, tell me I am sleeping. Wake me… Wake whom I used to be, whom I have ceased to be.
Have I even the right to cry…?