Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Pairings: Harry/Draco
Warnings: Slash, mention of NC, elements of NC
Summary: There's something in his blood.
His earrings looked ridiculous. They were long, dangling from a silver nub, falling on a thin thread that reminded Harry of a spiders web, then came to an end in a misty jewel- what kind, Harry had no idea. But it felt pleasant enough under his fingers as he played with them, letting the thread wrap around his fingers once before letting it fall.
He yawned, jaw opening slowly as he batted away at the suspended jewel, feeling for the entire world like a cat lazing in the sun.
The blond had always insisted on the most fashionable robes. If Harry wasn't mistaken, it seemed to be getting more and more ridiculous by the outfit. Harry smiled with satisfaction that the blond's newly-found accessory probably wouldn't see the light of day again- how quickly the fashion world moves.
He lifted his head off Draco's rising chest, head spinning momentarily from the sudden movement. He pulled himself upward, looking around the room.
He was bored.
Why the blond always insisted on cuddling after sex never ceased to amuse Harry. The inevitable nap afterwards had become annoying, though. No matter how good the sex, he was never tired enough to sleep.
He swung his legs over the side of the bed, pushing the weight onto his feet. He stood, walking over the window to peek through the dark curtains. It was past noon- the sun blazed into his eyes and Harry pushed the curtains back, blinking the spots from his vision.
He yawned once more before falling back onto the bed, not caring if he woke the blond. After sighing into his pillow, he pushed himself onto his back. The blood-red hangings draped over him, washing him in his thoughts again.
Would Draco find it inappropriate that sometimes during their passionate nights, as he moved inside him, Harry would just let his mind wander? Was it under some code of ethics that he shouldn't let his thoughts stray when his lover is over him, inside him, around him?
He couldn't help how calming those drapes felt over his head, floating on another world, bringing his mind with him. Harry couldn't help but smile at his mind indulged itself.
Blood was the perfect lube.
The thought had crossed Harry's mind many a time- watching the wispy-haired Malfoy at meetings, pressing himself fast against the man's coarse cheek, on rising up to meet him as his shoulders pushed against the crimson sheets.
It was so hard to love without hate. It was too consuming, too secure. It was strange, to feel so fulfilled and yet so empty. To feel that all consuming void that crept through his limbs to his fingertips, that tingled on the cool sheets.
It wasn't a thought he'd ever shared, despite how long his relationship with the Slytherin had lasted. The man was careful with him, afraid he would break. For all the intimacy, the truth was something he didn't think the man could handle. Maybe that was part of the game- how disgusted he'd be if he knew. It made it almost bearable.
Other times it infuriated him- who was he to dictate his wants? They were the one thing that was left as his own- the one thing he had left.
Not that he'd ever say he disapproved. The words never left his lips- but they were in his eyes, in the twitch of his nose.
But that was part of the game, too, wasn't it?
The blond stirred beside him, eyes opening slowly as his mouth rounded in a yawn. Harry ignored him. He wouldn't be coherent enough for anything for a while still.
All these years of being told who and what he was, what he would and needed to become. Letting his thoughts go and looking at himself was too painful- it was easier to accept what others said of him. If he just listened to what they told him, he was brave, strong, indestructible, a hero. Never mind those doubts that told him he was a weak, pitiful coward. They were wrong.
He wanted to be told what he should be. It was…simpler. The sheets would swallow him as his voice grew hoarse, and there wouldn't be any more Harry Potter, just simplicity.
Draco leaned over him, hands tracing the thin lining of his nightshirt. He sleepily pushed his face into Harry neck, breathing in deeply.
The gentle caresses, the soothing whispers in his ears- he didn't want them. His tongue moved across his teeth, lips sliding around them as he spoke. The beauty on his lips never made it to his ears- only sweet nothings, not the harsh sounds he longed for, telling him what he needed to become.
If he knew what Harry wanted- not that he'd ever tell him- he'd put Harry back in therapy on the hour. He could even see those pinks lips forming the words, stretching over his overly white teeth- "It's just some residual affect from the curse, you shouldn't act on it. It's not healthy." It angered Harry.
He refused to step foot in St. Mungo's again. And so, his longing would continue. He would be left to his fantasizing as he was fucked into the bed by his far too gentle blonde.
He loved him, as much as he could. He was sweet, took care of him, didn't ask any unnecessary questions, and his fortune ensured he'd never have to work again. Who'd ever thought that he, Harry Potter, the Golden Boy, would marry for the money?
Well, it wasn't all the money. He knew Draco loved him, and he had no qualms fucking him.
But all the same, he loved the blonde. Fuck buddies were nice, but they were so unpredictable. Once they'd established there was something more than lust, they'd had no trouble moving on to casual dating, and finally, a full-blown relationship. It had lasted seven months, before the bomb was dropped.
He was taken on the way back from Hogsmeade- he'd struggled, at first. Then there was that curse, and everything seemed much more pleasant. Much more pleasant. He'd never felt so good since. Something so good couldn't be wrong, could it?
He needed to be taken. He needed to be ruled. He needed all those things someone like him shouldn't want- that he couldn't help but crave.
It was the curse, they said. It had to be. No one could decipher the curse, and as far as history was concerned, no such curse existed. But it had to be the curse, they'd rationalized.
He knew better than that.
He'd come to the conclusion that he was sick- he'd finally snapped. One too many pushes and here was their Golden Boy, fantasizing about things no savior should be fantasizing about. The thought seemed to satisfy him. He was crazy. He could handle that.
Draco couldn't.
Draco had slowly started to undress Harry again, tantalizing. Gentle.
The fabric caressed his skin lightly as it fell around his arms, buttons slowly unfolded, thin pants pushed downwards, tracing light goosebumps down his arms and legs. He closed his eyes- warm breath touching his neck. It left him breathless.
He couldn't take it.
He grabbed the blond's hair, pulling it back before pushing him hard off the bed. He let go of the blond's hair, watching as he fell back before bringing himself up on his elbows.
Harry didn't wait. He pushed the blond back to the floor, reaching for his jugular. The blond reacted quickly, grabbing Harry's hands and pulling them both upwards, arms over his head, tripping the back of his knees on the bed and falling on top of him.
Harry struggled, kicking his legs, trying to pull his arms out of Draco's grasp. The blond didn't relent, pushing back with equal force. It sent shivers up Harry's spine.
"What the HELL was that, Harry? What's gotten into-"
Harry kneed him between the legs, feeling the hard flesh give as Draco curled on his side next to him. He yowled, grasping himself as he stared at Harry with wide eyes. His mouth gasped soundlessly as Harry slowly rolled on top of him.
Harry's breath traced his ear, the tip of his tongue dipping into the hollows.
"You're pathetic. Can't take on someone half your size?"
And then Harry bit him. He actually bit him!
He gasped in pain, the blood pulsing in his ears. For a moment, Draco saw red, and then Harry was again pinned beneath him, only this time one hand held his hands over his head, the other pulling at Harry's hair, his head pulled back. His skin stretched over his throat, the muscles moving as he gasped for breath.
One of Draco's earrings had fallen out. It brought a smirk to Harry's lips, muddled between his gaping mouth. His head spun as he pushed his hips against the blond, eyes rolling back as their erections touched.
The blonde pushed his hips down, teeth clenched as he tried to meet Harry's eyes- but they wandered away, hands clawing at him to keep him distracted.
"Harry- stop that!- Harry, look at me, what's wrong!"
Harry's hands sought out those pink lips, willing the words louder. He was close, so close, he thought.
Draco pulled up on his arms, trying to shake Harry out of whatever it was he'd gotten himself into. His hands clawed into Harry's wrists, pushing Harry's hips into the mattress with his own, until he couldn't move at all.
Harry wrestled, eyes closed. It shouldn't have felt so good. He mewed, muscles pushing every which way as he tried to escape, reveling in his inability to do so.
He slowly opened his eyes, lips slightly parted dazedly as he met his lovers eyes. They were confused, hurt, concerned… angry.
God, his anger was beautiful.
Taking advantage of his lover's gaze, Harry pulled his arms out of Draco's grasp before pushing his shoulder away. And then they were biting, scratching, punching, moving in a flurry of naked limbs. Draco pinned Harry's hips to the bed once more, before biting hard on his hipbone. Harry screamed, the wound hot on his side- and then Draco's tongue was sucking the wound raw, Harry gasping beneath him.
Draco almost choked at the first taste of his blood. Oh god, no, what am I doing…
He pulled back as if he'd been burned. Harry partly reached for him, partly clawed at him as he moved to the other end of the bed. Seeing his blond lover back off, Harry sat up, still breathless.
"Wha- what's wrong? Why'd you stop?"
Harry's breathing was hard, eyes half closed. His legs were spread wide, unabashedly. His arms, chest, legs, all of him was covered in shallow scratches. He looked so incredibly… aroused.
Draco was terrified.
"Harry, what is this? What are we doing? Why are you- how could you…" Draco swallowed a sob. He wouldn't get emotional now. He needed to be the strong one.
He'd been angry when Harry had pushed him away- who wouldn't be? But then the push had become more, and he had… God, he had hurt Harry. How could he? What kind of monster was he?
Harry's eyes trained on the fluttering of the blond's lashes. His mind was searching for something. That wouldn't do. He didn't want him to think, they'd never get anywhere. And he was so excited, they couldn't stop now.
He crawled over to the blond, keeping low on the sheets. He kept the blond's gaze, his hands sliding up his legs, head following his pale fingers. They reached between Draco's legs, mouth nuzzling his somewhat flaccid length. He nipped at it as he brought one of Draco's hands onto the wound on his hip, pushing his fingers hard into it.
Draco gasped, staring at his blood-covered hand before meeting his lover's eyes again. They were begging him. It was wrong, so horribly wrong- but it was what Harry wanted. It couldn't be wrong then, could it?
He could have cried right then.
And then Draco was hitting him, pushing him back on the bed, biting him around his neck, clawing inside of him, ripping at his skin. He could taste his blood on his lips, staining his teeth, glittering on his gums and rubbing across his face.
Then those hands were clawing at Draco, begging him, pulling him downwards into his bleeding entrance.
He tried not to think of the spells they'd placed on Harry- how they'd cursed him into thinking he enjoyed the rape, how they'd gone into his mind and twisted and pulled until it broke, refused to acknowledge the curses were permanent. He refused to believe the intimate times they shared were the product of a curse that made Harry believe he loved something his sane mind said he hated.
Draco let the tears run down his face, cutting paths through the smudges of blood around his mouth. The streams trickled through the drying mass of red and brown, taking with it the pain. No matter how hard or long he cried, the blood clung helplessly to his face. He would never be able to cry it all away- his tears weren't enough.
Harry was scraping his back now, fingernails like claws leaving deep, red and raw trails along his back. He was screaming, delirious. His eyes traveled across the room, seeing things that weren't there, all of which excited him.
He pulled Harry's legs around his shoulders, watching the headboard as he pounded into the tight flesh. He sucked his lip into his mouth as he pushed and pulled, Harry's flesh raw beneath him.
It was Harry who came first- one last testament to some horrid truth Draco had spent the last few months avoiding. He'd always have to suck Harry off after Draco came. This time, it was Draco who continued to fuck Harry before he finally came himself.
He pulled away, refusing to look at the bloody mess he knew was between both their legs.
Harry sighed, eyes closing as he smiled into the sheets. Draco lay down to his side, head pushed into the pillow. He couldn't bear to look at him- what had he done?
But then Harry put his arms around him, pushing him onto his back as he snuggled- yes, snuggled! - into his neck. With a bitter smile, Draco put his own arms around the raven-haired man. Harry had never been the one to initiate the cuddling before.
He should be mad. He should be worried. He should be telling Harry this was wrong, that he needed help. But then the man in his arms let out a contented sigh before swinging his leg around Draco's waist, his breathing becoming shallow. He chocked back a sob- silent tears falling down his face and into the ruffled, black hair.
In the end, they both craved the pain.
A/N: This is very, very, VERY experimental for me, it's completely OOC from what I usually write- not that I write much, mind you, but if I DID, it would still be out of character.
Thank you to my awesome beta, Beth! And look, I actually met a deadline for once! is proud of herself
As a side-note: My beta has created a Yahoo group where you can find all the stories before they're posted anywhere else. You can find it here (delete the spaces) http/ groups.yahoo. com/group/museofmonotonyhd. Hope to see some of you there!