Author's notes: This is a fill of a kink request.

Request is: So, there are some unfortunate implications to the fact that Fenris wears Hawke's crest, but he/she doesn't return the favor, what with Fenris' history as a slave and all. Hawke decides the way to remedy this is to get tattooed with Fenris' name. Fenris is (a) horrified that Hawke would brand him/herself like a slave and (b) disgusted with himself because (c) he finds it incredibly hot.

I have a slight preference for F!Hawke, but will take M!Hawke if it gets this prompt filled.

This is my take on it. It didn't turn out the way I had orignially planned. Bit heavier than I thought it would be. Fenris took over. Darn him. PS It will contain a bit of sex. Not bad or graphic. Just know that it's rated M for a reason.

Fenris

I paced outside her house in indecision. Things had been strained between us for three long years now. Three long years that had found me here every night, wishing I could find the courage to go to her. Praying for the strength to stay away. She needed to be free. She needed to find happiness. I was too screwed up to give her either of those things. And I was selfish enough to want her to only have it with me.

So for three years I had paced around her home. Waiting for some sign that she still cared. That she still wanted me with her. That I hadn't burned the bridge completely.

She had never spoken of that night again. I would catch her watching my wrist occasionally. A look of pain would run across her face, but she would quickly mask it. I had often thought of taking it off. That stupid ribbon she had wrapped around my wrist one day on a whim. I could still see her shining eyes as she looked up at me.

"It's a token." She smiled at me.

"It's a ribbon." I had frowned at her.

She rolled her eyes at me. "Yes, Fenris, but it's also a token."

"A token of what?"

She had smiled that smile that did me in. "To show my favor to my favorite warrior." She kissed my cheek quickly and then had bound out of my house leaving me stunned and confused. It had been a few nights later that we had discussed moving our relationship to a more…intimate one.

I could still remember it as if it was only moments ago. Her cheeks flushed and her eyes nervous. The wine we had drank stained her lips that she gnawed on. "We could…try it…if you wanted." She offered glancing away from me when I looked up at her surprised.

"Maybe some other night." It wasn't that I didn't want her. I had always wanted her. The instant I saw her fighting the Tevinter hunters for me all those years ago I had wanted her. I wanted to claim her, but she was too good for the likes of me. I had no right even entertaining these ideas. But nothing I did deterred her. She had tolerated all my moods. Never asking anything of me. Until that night.

I paused in my pacing as the pain of that night coursed over me again. And again I was watching her hurt and confused eyes as I told her I couldn't do it.

"But…I care about you."

"I'm sorry." I said lamely and turned away from her.

"Please don't leave me." I couldn't look back as I walked away. I tried to pretend it hadn't mattered. Her quiet plea. Her tears. But they had. They destroyed my heart. I was a shell walking around now. I had thought she would abandon me. Shun me. But she hadn't.

She wasn't the same girl I had fallen in love with after that night. She didn't smile as easily, didn't laugh as freely. There was a toughness to her that hadn't been present before. I wasn't vain enough to believe it was all my fault. My walking out had only been one of many things to go wrong for her in that horrible year. But it had been the start of her changing.

Then a few weeks ago, all of that had changed. Her grief seemed to give way and finally she smiled again. She had even started coming around me more often. And then today she had stood by my side when I had faced my final demon from my past.

I had hoped things would go differently when I had asked her to come with me. I hadn't even thought it was a trap. That was what I had told her when I asked her to come with me to see my sister. But the truth was, I wanted her with me.

And it had all gone south. She had shoved me behind her, begging me to run. I had been confused, not seeing the trap until it was too late. Danarius had walked down those stairs smiling at me coldly as fear washed over me. I had always known he would come back for me. She had always said she would never let him take me, but I feared what would happen now. I had hurt her. Deeply. And Danarius offered her a reward.

Her response had been to toss a dagger, hitting him square in his shoulder, rendering one arm useless. Her actions spurred me to act. We had quickly killed all the guards with him. She had kept the others back, allowing me to finish him off. She had then stood by my side while I dealt with my sister.

"Please, make him stop!" My sister had cried to Hawke.

"It's not my place to stop him. You wronged Fenris. I will stand behind whatever he decides to do." She had said coldly. I knew she loved her family. To the point she had nearly given her life for them repeatedly. But she understood that Varania wasn't actually family. She had sold me out to get ahead. I killed her and turned to my beloved Hawke.

She watched me, waiting to see how I would react now. So many times we had fought together and so many times I had refused to allow her near me, physically or emotionally. I had shoved her off whenever she tried to comfort me. And all I wanted was for her to put her arms around me and tell me it was going to be alright.

"I'm all alone now. I have nothing left. No family. No enemy." I should have felt relieved, but I felt confused and fearful.

She looked at me sadly. "You have me, Fenris." I had looked at her for a second. Her eyes saying all the things I had been afraid I would never see again. I had bolted. Too afraid to say what I felt. Too afraid she would push me away. But what did I really have to lose?

It was late, but her light was still on. I knew I shouldn't have just gone into her home. I knew I should have knocked. At least on her bedroom door, but I couldn't chance her refusing to see me. So instead I ghosted in and drank in the sight of her.

She had her armor off from the waist up. Only her corset covering her upper body. She was looking at a wound on her shoulder from the battle earlier. Her gown lay on the bed, forgotten for a moment. I watched her reflection as she ran her hand down from the wound to the markings below her corset.

I felt anger boil through me as I saw it. I moved closer to get a better look. There on her ribcage, just under her breast, was a slaver mark. Tattoos as Isabela called them. That had not been there the night we had been together. I remembered every inch of her beautiful body.

She stroked the markings for a moment. I watched her for a second. Her eyes sad in the mirror as she looked at the mark. I then lowered my eyes to the marking.

It was a white wolf, standing proudly. Defiant green eyes glaring back at me. Strange markings ran down his limbs. I realized with a start they matched my lyrium markings. I released my powers and jerked her around to face me. She screamed as I did.

"FENRIS!" Her breathing fast and her eyes wide with fright. "What in the name of all that's holy are you doing?"

I dropped to my knees beside her and turned her so I could run my fingers over the marking. She shivered as the metal claw of my gauntlet touched her. I pulled back and tossed it off, keeping my other hand holding onto her arm.

"What have you done?" I demanded looking up at her as I stroked the wolf with my now bare hand."

"I…" She trailed off and then pulled away from me. "What are you doing here?" She grabbed her gown off the bed and quickly pulled it on.

"I came hoping we could talk." I said frowning at her.

"Then talk."

"Tell me why you have that on you first." I demanded and crossed my arms.

"You barged in here to ask about my tattoo?" She dodged. She looked embarrassed and moved to keep the bed between us.

"You know that the bed won't deter me if I feel the need to get to you." I smirked at her.

-0-

Hawke

I felt a bit like a rabbit being hunted by a wolf right now. Fenris was so angry, but I couldn't tell him why I had the tattoo. I had already humiliated myself enough around him.

"Fenris…" I shook my head looking away from him.

"Talk to me." He ordered. I looked up at him then. His green eyes mixed with anger and something else.

"Why not? Right? I've already let you destroy me once. Why not another time?" I said bitterly and turned my back to him in defeat.

"Hawke…" He said and I could hear him moving towards me.

"Don't. Please. I can't bear to see the look in your eye when I explain it." I sat down on the bed and took a breath. "You have the ribbon and shield you wear. I don't know why you still wear them, but…" It didn't matter why. This was about me. "I had nothing to wear of yours. Nothing to show you I cared. Nothing to show the world that…" I couldn't resist the urge and turned to face him. "I belonged to you." His eyes widened slightly and a look of anger moved across his handsome features. I closed my eyes and looked away. "Despite what happened. Despite the fact you don't want me, Fenris, I…" I took a breath and tried again. "I needed something for myself. You changed my life. Touched me in a way no one ever has before. No one ever will again. Like it or not, I belong to you."

He moved quicker than I could even imagine. I had seen him appear suddenly, but this was even quicker. He cupped my face in his hands, his other gauntlet gone now as well. His green eyes piercing mine. His fingers stroked my skin where they touched. "I'm so sorry. I never…" He swallowed hard and looked away for a second. "I don't own you, Hawke. You belong to no one. I never wanted to take your freedom."

I closed my eyes as a wave of despair washed over me. I had foolishly hoped that he was going to say he still wanted me. I should have known it would be about slavery. It was always about that with him. Just as it was always templars with Anders, and the Chantry with Sebastian.

"You didn't take anything from me, Fenris. I gave it to you. And I'm not talking about a slavery thing. You have my heart. I've tried to fight it. Tried to give you space. Tried to forget that night ever happened. But you're all I can think about. I lay here night after night wondering if you remember it at all. If you think of me. This mark…it let me still feel connected to you."

"I owe you an explanation and an apology." He said as his hands continued to stroke my face. His thumbs rough on my cheekbones as he dried the tears that fell. I hated him seeing me weak. I hated hurting him. But I had to let him know. He was free now. The threat hanging over him gone. I was sure he was going to leave now. I wished I could leave this blasted city. Let them all fight amongst themselves. No one was listening to me anyway.

"You don't owe me anything." I looked away.

"I owe you everything." He whispered forcing me to look back at him. He hesitated only a moment before he moved closer. He paused looking at me in question. I tilted my head up to him, waiting for him to close the distance.

Words fell away as we kissed. We didn't need words. We didn't need explanations or apologies. What we needed was this right here. Each other.

We stood, our lips never breaking apart as we began fumbling, trying to pull off his armor and my clothes. Finally we were forced to as we tangled together painfully. He took matters into his own hands and ripped the remaining clothes from me before quickly shucking the rest of his.

We tumbled back into the bed. Kissing, biting, stroking. Our bodies were aflame with need. I arched into him as he pressed me to the bed. His eyes searching, questioning. I could see the question in them. He feared it was too soon. He feared he hadn't done things properly. I shifted my hips and took him in. An almost feral sound was wrenched from his lips as he sank into me. Filling me with an exquisite pleasure that begged for more. His eyes opened slowly as he held himself still.

"Look at me." He commanded. I nodded. And we watched each other. Our eyes never leaving the others as we began to move together in a dance as old as time. Even when the passion over took us and we plunged over the cliff together. Our names on each others lips. He drove into me one last time before crushing his lips to mine.

"Stay with me." I asked as I buried my face in his neck.

"Forever." He promised and curled around me.

"I'm going to hold you to that." I whispered as sleep claimed me.

-0-

Fenris

I watched her as she slept. This wasn't much different than our first night together. The only difference this time was I didn't feel a clawing need to run now. Not that she would let me. I smiled as I looked at her. Her head was pillowed on my arm, both her hands clasping that hand as if even in sleep she needed the reassurance I was still here.

My eyes wondered to the tattoo. My mark. She had done it for me. She said she wanted to have a marking to wear for me. Like I wore her crest and favor. Part of me hated it. Hated she had marred her beautiful flesh with something so close to what a slaver would do. But a part of me was thrilled with it. She was marked as mine. Forever. I felt shame at that thought.

I didn't want to own her. I didn't want to possess her. But deep down I did. Deep down I feared if I didn't, she would wake up and realize what I was. Who she was. That she could do better. That she deserved better. So part of me needed this marking. A sick and sad part of me that wanted to let the world know she belonged to me.

It was why I wore her crest and favor. To show everyone that I was hers. Body and soul. She was my mistress and I her slave. Not as Danarius had owned me, but simply by being the woman who held my heart. It was a leash that I found I didn't mind having someone hold. So long as that someone was her.

I slid my arm from her waist, lightly trailing it up to trace the handsome wolf that decorated her side. She had chosen a wolf to represent me. Not just my name. We had had that conversation before.

"His little wolf is what he used to call me." I had explained about Danarius renaming me since I had no memory of a name. I cringed as I thought of the fact I knew my name now. But that person was gone. I wasn't sweet and naïve Leto who dreamed of a better future for his family.

I was Fenris, stronger, wiser (sometimes), and braver. Leto had given all he had to secure his family's future, but it hadn't been something he could truly grasp or imagine. He wasn't brave enough to take it for himself.

I was brave enough to grab the life he had hoped for, but not known how to imagine. She had given me that. I shoved that thought and memories aside. I could think of my long lost past later. I had that option now. Memories had returned with the death of Danarius. Or maybe it was in hearing Hawke say I still had her that had freed me from the bindings of that life.

She had smiled at me with that teasing look. "I can see how it fits."

"Because I'm a wild beast?" I sneered angrily. It was what that bastard Anders liked to call me.

"You aren't a beast, Fenris. A little wild maybe, but not a beast." She smiled at me. She always knew I couldn't tolerate too much seriousness or comforting. She mixed the right amount of soothing with teasing. Somehow always knowing what I needed. "You are beautiful and proud. Strong and independent, but loyal at the same time."

"Like a dog." I snarled angrily. Not hearing her words for what they were.

"Damn it, Fenris! Stop trying to pick a fight. First, I didn't call you an animal of any sort. Second, I'm Ferelden. Don't knock dogs. I happen to love mine very much, you jerk. Now sit down and shut up. Let me finish explaining before you get mad and storm off." She snapped. I was too surprised by her outburst to do anything but what she asked. "You are the embodiment of a wolf. Strong, proud, independent, loyal. A survivor. A hunter. A predator. Danarius will rue the day he ever gave you those markings or that name. Don't fight it, Fenris. Embrace your wolf."

"Like you embrace your hawk?" I asked snarkily. She huffed and turned to go.

"I'm going to go before we say something we both regret. Or I show you my claws."

She hadn't spoken to me for a few days after that. I knew her name was a touchy subject for her. Her mother was already going by her maiden name. We never spoke of it again. But I had started taking pride in the name and image of being a wolf then.

I traced the edges of the white wolf. I followed the trail of his markings that matched my own. Mine, I thought. I moved closer to whisper to her. I needed to confess all these feelings I had. I couldn't hold them. I could work them out while she slept. And then tomorrow we could have that talk we hadn't gotten around to tonight.

"You're mine. Completely and totally. Nothing will separate us now. You're bound to me. I'll gladly step into whatever the future holds so long as you are by my side. I will not run where you don't go. And you cannot escape me, my little bird. Nothing short of death shall keep me from you." I moved so I could get closer to her tattoo. "This symbol shows you that you're mine. It marks you as property. Do you realize it? Did you know it when you did it? Masters mark their slaves to show ownership. Brand them like cattle. It's sick that I find I like it. It's wrong that I want to show it to the world. I know what it was like to be owned by another. Even though I gladly wear your crest and favor to show the world, I never wanted to own you. Or at least I didn't think I did. But seeing that marking…hearing you say you're mine…I find myself wanting to possess you. A sick thrill goes through me at the thought of you being mine to command…Mine to possess…" I trailed off as she shifted. I watched horrified as she turned to me with shining eyes. "Hawke…I…"

She laid a hand on my cheek forcing me to look at her. I closed my eyes in shame. She had heard my deepest and darkest thoughts. How could I, a former slave, wish to own another person? She was going to ask me to leave. She was going to hate me now.

"Fenris, look at me." She said quietly.

"I can't." I whispered. I felt her move closer and I wished she wasn't holding me so tightly. I wanted to flee, but I knew I couldn't. I wouldn't leave her until she asked it this time. I owed her that. If nothing more than for the sick fantasies I had of owning her. She kissed my cheek and snuggled closer to me.

"Fenris, I am yours. I gave myself to you. You didn't take me. You didn't make me your slave. Belonging to you doesn't have to mean only what you've known. This is what love is, Fenris. I am yours. It isn't sick to want me to be yours. Unless I'm sick. Because I want you to be mine." I opened my eyes and looked at her. She was watching me with a ghost of a smile.

"You…want to own me?" I asked worried and feeling better all at the same time. If she was still holding me and smiling, she wasn't disgusted with me completely.

"Not in the slavery sense. But your heart? Yes. I don't want to command you, Fenris. I want to be yours. I want you to be mine. I want you to love me…as I love you." She looked shy and worried then. "Am I making any sense?"

"I…think so." I said slowly. Love. She said she loved me. She said this was what love was. Was I ready for love? Was I ready to say the words to her? I knew what I felt for her, but the words…

Once again she knew what I needed. She pulled herself even closer to me, twisting me so I was laying flat on the bed. She stroked my markings down my chest as she leaned over me. "I do not need to hear the words, Fenris. You gave me all I ever needed tonight. So long as you are willing to be by my side, it's enough. And as to you wanting to possess me…well, there is nothing wrong with a bit of role playing." My breath caught as she followed the markings to my waistband.

"Role playing?" I asked trying to think rationally. Her hands seemed to know me as well as she did. Finding all the sensitive places and placing just the right touch on them to make my blood burn.

"That's what it's called."

"What what's called?" I asked gasping as her lips began following her hands path.

"You wanting to command me. I'm assuming you don't mean in the middle of battle, right?" She asked pausing in what she was doing to look up at me. I shook my head feeling pleasure and guilt course through me. She smiled at me wickedly making me shiver. She placed a final kiss on my stomach and then sat back on her knees. "So command me, Master."

"Don't call me that!" I said feeling horrified and impossibly turned on as well. I was going to Void for these thoughts.

"Fenris, it's not real. It's just a game. I'm willing to submit to you. At least here in the bedroom. Not so good at submitting elsewhere." She smiled at me.

"But this is wrong." I moved to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Why?" She asked moving to sit with me.

"Because to command someone…to take away their power…it's wrong."

"If it wasn't consensual it would be. I want you to do this. I want to be at your mercy. I want to please you. If we get to a place that's uncomfortable for either of us, we have a safe word and stop." She said watching me.

"How do you know all this?" I demanded watching her as she blushed.

"Isabela talks way too much. But I have to confess something."

"What?" I asked cautiously.

"I've sort of wanted this too. I…look, Fenris, I'm not very experienced in this department. You've been the only one I've ever been with. I want to make you happy, but I don't know how. This will teach me what you like and don't."

I kissed her. She didn't think less of me. She didn't even mind my fantasy. This was better than I deserved. I would gladly spend the rest of my life proving to her that I loved her. I would find someway to be worthy of her.

"You swear if I do something that makes you uncomfortable, you'll say so?" I asked.

"Promise. Safe word?"

I thought long and hard trying to come up with something that would make her smile. This felt a little strange and overwhelming, but if she was willing, I wouldn't refuse. "Broody."

She laughed. "Perfect. But every time I hear Varric call you that now, I'll crack up."

"I doubt he'll have much of a reason to be calling me that anymore." Her eyes lit up as she watched me. "Now on your knees, slave." I ordered feeling sick and turned on. There was a gleam in her eye as she slowly lowered herself to the floor. She really was enjoying this.

"As my master commands."