Disclaimer: Not my characters. Or my world. Just my late night sub-plot.
Just Wait for the Morning
The castle was silent. Unbelievably silent, considering the catastrophe that had occurred such a short time before.
Hermione Granger shifted in what she had been told was once Neville Longbottom's bed, unable to sleep. Exhausted though she was, she had far too much going on in her mind to even contemplate the possibility of sleep. Her companions, Ron Weasley and Harry Potter, snored quietly from their old beds across the room.
Hermione was glad that they slept; they deserved it. After the hell they had just faced, sleep was the least she could hope that they got in return. Just two hours ago… was it really so short a time span? Hermione felt as if she had lived one thousand lifetimes since the moment she saw Lord Voldemort fall lifeless upon the floor of the Great Hall.
While the outside world rejoiced, Hogwarts was in a state of silent mourning. Sure, Voldemort was gone. Sure, the Death Eaters were finished. But that was not enough to ease the pain filling the hearts of every living being residing in the castle that night. So many were lost… Mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, friends…
But good things had come as well, she reasoned, as was her nature to do so. She and Ron had finally expressed their feelings for each other. She, Harry, Ron, Ginny, Luna, and Neville had all lived. Voldemort had been defeated… But all this seemed to pale in comparison to the heavy weight that pressed down on her chest.
A door creaked in the silence. Hermione went rigidly still, listening. Her blood ran ice cold as her mind whirred, trying to remember which Death Eaters may have escaped with their lives. Slowly, ever so slowly, she heard the door open and a quiet thud as the entrant took a step forward. Another thud. Another. A large shadow fell over her pillow.
"Patrificus Totallus!" Hermione whispered, pointing her wand towards the man.
The man fell with a crash, making Hermione thankful for the Muffliato spell she had cast around Harry and Ron's beds. Let them sleep. Whoever this was, she could surely take care of herself. Hadn't she proven that tonight?
The thought did little to calm her fears, however. She rose slowly out of bed, pointing her wand shakily in the direction of the fallen body. "Lumos," she whispered. She braced herself for what she might see as the wand beam traveled over the floor to the man's face…
"Neville!" Hermione breathed. She rushed to his side, kneeling beside his head. She lifted the hex at once and helped him to sit up. "Neville! Oh Neville, I'm so sorry. I've been on edge and I couldn't sleep and-"
"Shh, Hermione," he whispered. "It's fine. I understand. It only makes sense, after what you've been through. I just came to get something out of my trunk. Haven't been up here in a while… Still smells the same."
Hermione found herself doing what she thought to be the unthinkable: smiling.
Neville stood, offering her his hand. "Up you get. Go back to bed; you've had a rough go."
"We all have…" she mumbled, taking the proffered hand and getting to her feet.
"What is it with you and that hex? Every time…"
"Sorry," she whispered, the ghost of a smile gracing her lips.
He looked down at her –when had he gotten so tall? – and his weary expression softened slightly. "It's nothing. Now off to bed with you. Sorry I woke you."
"I wasn't asleep," she sighed, plopping back down on his old bed. "I couldn't…"
"I thought you'd be exhausted after all of this."
"I am… But… I can't stop… thinking!"
Neville scoffed lightly. "What else is new?"
"No… I mean… Never mind."
"Hermione, you need to talk about it. We all do."
"But, I-"
"No 'but I's. You talk. I'll listen," he said, sitting down beside her.
She sighed. "It's just that… every time I close my eyes… I see them, Neville. I see them. Fred, Lupin, Tonks, Colin… All of them. It's like a loop playing behind my eyelids."
"I know. I see them too."
Hermione sighed, burying her head in her hands. "It's just not fair. They were too young!"
"All of us are, Hermione. Everybody here tonight was too young to die. But that was a sacrifice that all of us made. Them, you, me… Sometimes you have to sacrifice today to make a better tomorrow."
"You… Neville, you were - are… so brave."
"No I wasn't."
"Yes. Neville, you killed Nagini! You led the Hogwarts uprising! You led the battle tonight!"
"No I didn't," he protested. "Harry did."
"No, Neville. It was you." She looked him in the eye. Had they always been such an enchanting hazel? She reached out for his hand. "You are an amazing man, Neville Longbottom."
"Not as amazing as you, Hermione."
Hermione said nothing, merely shook her head in silence.
A few moments went by, marked only by the steady snores coming from Harry's and Ron's direction.
"I wonder…" Hermione said after a while. "I think to myself, Why them? Why them and not me? They had so much life left to life. I've done enough with my life. But they haven't… They haven't lived long enough yet."
"Hermione, you're only seventeen."
"I feel… so much older."
"I know. So do I. I had to carry little Colin's body, you know. It… I don't know. I feel lost."
"Me too."
Silence fell again.
"Neville… I am so happy that you are alive."
"And I that you are."
Hermione leaned over and buried her face in his torn, singed sweater.
"I wish I could promise you that it will all be better in the morning," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her. "But we both know I'd be lying. A bit of daylight isn't going to change the fact that hundreds of people sit downstairs, torn apart by the death of people they love. It's not going to change how old we feel or how tired we are or how cold or how sad or how lost… But it will give us an opportunity to start moving forward. Pick up the pieces. Reach out to one another. Mourn and cry and love and heal. That's all I can promise you. It will be hard, but we can do it. Just wait for the morning."
"And until then? What do we do now, before the sun rises and we start our new lives?"
"We tie up the loose ends. Close up our old lives so we can start moving forward."
"What do you mean?"
"Well for me, it means doing this…" Neville slowly brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, stroking down her jawline and cradling her cheek gently in one hand. "Forgive me," he breathed as he closed the distance between them.
The kiss was slow and chaste, full of sadness and pain. Hermione responded in turn, reaching up to stroke his stubbly cheek. The taste of salt mingled on their joined lips as the tears slipped soundlessly down their faces.
After a long while, he pulled away. "Thank you. I needed that… closure."
"What do y-"
He stood. "I know you don't want to hear this, Hermione… But I'm in love with you… Ever since first year. Just thought you should know."
"But, Neville-"
"I know. I'm very, very happy for you. I needed this. To tie up that loose end, stow it away, like I said. In the morning, we'll both start anew." He sighed and smiled slightly. "Tell Ron from me… that he is a very lucky man."
Hermione nodded, tears still trickling down her cheeks. Neville bent down and wiped them away lightly with his thumbs. He stooped and placed a soft kiss on her forehead.
"Goodnight, Hermione," he said, an air of gentle finality in his voice.
He was almost at the door when Hermione spoke one last time. "She's lucky too, Neville. Whoever 'she' will be." She smiled - the first real smile to grace her lips in months. "Goodnight."
He smiled in return. "You feel that? In your heart?"
She nodded. "Hope."
The corners of his lips turned up as he nodded. "Hope. See you in the morning."
The door clicked shut behind him.
A/N: This one isn't too great, in my opinion. Definitely not my best, but the idea came to me and would not leave me alone, so I wrote this late at night and posted it. It's not beta-ed, and hardly even self-edited. I mainly wrote it for myself. So if you like it, tell me. If you hate it, tell me. :-) I might either rewrite or delete this later on, depending on the general opinion of all you lovely readers out there. :-) Thank you for reading! Reviews would be amazing! (hint-hint) ;-)