Fubuki his head against the back of his beach chair with half a mind to push Ryo into the pool to shut him up. He was tired of this argument and tired of Ryo's pestering, especially on a nice sunny day like this one. "I am not a selfish chicken. I just don't like needles."

"Don't you mean you're afraid of them?" Ryo asked, baiting him. He still looked awkward in a beach chair and wore sunglasses only so he would be spared eye contact with people. Fubuki had hoped to turn him into a sunbather and maybe get him to tan a bit, but so far his skin remained pale as paper. And now that Ryo had started badgering again, he was beginning to regret asking for company.

"You know perfectly well there's a fine line between being afraid of something and not liking it."

"Don't you think you could put your dislike of needles aside just once every couple of months?" Fubuki didn't answer and Ryo rolled his eyes. "It only hurts for a second."

Fubuki sighed. "Yeah, but then you feel all dizzy afterwards."

Ryo crossed his arms. "It's nothing you can't handle. If I can take an injection every month, I think you can take one every three months."

Fubuki thought that was an unfair argument to use. "Then how come you didn't donate before? You were eligible for at least a year or two before your heart went haywire. I don't recall seeing you show up when the bloodmobiles were on campus," he snapped.

Ryo was quiet for a minute. There was no excuse he could make. Before last year, donating blood had always seemed like someone else's job, and giving his own to a stranger reeked of sticking his nose into someone else's business. The idea of a blood transplant was like reading about a kidnapping in the newspaper; you never cared unless it happened to someone you knew.

"I should have, all right? But if everyone was as selfish as me, Shou wouldn't be around." Ryo's voice cracked a little on that last part. It was still hard for him to think about.

Fubuki looked over at Ryo and took his hand. "Even if you had donated, there's no guarantee that your blood would have gone to Shou."

"But maybe it would have. We're both O negative, and not many people are." Some big brother he was. His stomach turned at seeing Shou's bruised, bloodied body on a stretcher in front of his face again and he quickly took off his sunglasses and fixed his eyes on the pool. Some days, water was the only thing that calmed him. Water and Fubuki.

Fubuki noticed and got up, squeezing into the chair with him. He laid his head on Ryo's chest and was relieved when the pulse was calm. "Ryo, you can't keep blaming yourself. No one has control over these things, they just happen."

Ryo tilted his chin upward so their eyes met. "How would you feel if something happened to Asuka and you know you could have done something to prevent it?"

"Don't say that!" Fubuki clutched at his shirt- it was a hot day but Ryo wouldn't go shirtless in the desert- and clenched his teeth. He hated what Shou's accident had done to Ryo. Every time Fubuki left to go somewhere, Ryo told him to be careful. Every time one of them was away and they talked on the phone, Ryo told Fubuki he loved him before hanging up and got upset if Fubuki hung up before he could say it. And if- God forbid- Fubuki was late coming home, Ryo practically had to sedate himself to keep from having another relapse with his heart.

Why can't he move on? Fubuki whined internally. Yes, Shou had been lucky to come out alive, but at least he was okay. At least they'd finally gotten the donation, albeit at the last minute. Fubuki shuddered a little at that. Ryo had kept insisting over and over that he would gladly give his life for Shou, and his little brother had been just as stubborn in asserting that he would not allow that to happen. Seeing as no one else was a match, the rest of the Marufuji family and friends had had no choice but to watch the two brothers bicker back and forth with tears in their eyes.

And now Ryo was the world's biggest advocate for donating blood, as if he felt that would assuage his guilt at not being able to do so himself. So far he'd convinced everyone else to do it, even Manjoume. Of course Fubuki wanted to help people if he could, but…those needles were huge. He hated shots of any kind more than anything in the world.

Ryo kissed his forehead. "Please?" Fubuki groaned. It was rare for Ryo to say please and even rarer for him to bring out the puppy dog eyes. No one ever believed Fubuki when he told them Ryo had puppy dog eyes, but it was true. And they were almost as effective as Fubuki's.

He rewarded Ryo with a big, dramatic sigh that normally would have made his boyfriend snap at him to quit being a drama queen. "All right. I'll do it if you promise to be right by my side."

Ryo smiled and rubbed his back. "I wouldn't have it any other way." He shifted so Fubuki would get off him and then stood up. "Let's go."

Fubuki blinked. "Right now?"

Ryo gave him that look that said, Duh. "Can you think of a better time?"

"But…" This wasn't fair. He had agreed to donate someday, in the very distant future. Eventually. When they got around to it. Not today. Not now. "I mean- don't I have to eat and drink first?"

Ryo smirked. "You just packed away two fish, three bowls of ramen and two water bottles. You'll be fine."

"But-" Ryo raised an eyebrow. "Okay." Fubuki hunched his shoulders and followed Ryo out the door, rubbing his poor, poor, innocent arms.

"You're doing the right thing, Fubuki," Ryo assured him, patting his hand. "Trust me, you're going to be okay."

Fubuki sipped slowly at the fruit juice they'd given him and averted his eyes. He hated this place, with its clean, antiseptic smell and the ugly, smelly gloves everyone wore and the loud beeping machines. First there had been the registration and then the insanely long health questionnaires and consent forms and then the interrogation by the nurse and worst of all, the poke in the finger that did hurt- thanks very much, Ryo. He wished they'd just stick him already and get it over with.

"I'll be right here," Ryo said, squeezing his hand. Fubuki didn't say anything. He just leaned back into the chair and shut his eyes, trying not to think. The nurse who'd been tending to him came bustling back from washing her hands.

"Which arm do you want me to use, sweetie?" she asked. Fubuki quickly looked her over and felt relieved. Maybe it was a stereotype, but he always felt that women had a gentler touch than men. And this woman was just the right age too. Old enough to have plenty of experience and not get distracted by his stunning good looks, but young enough to still care if she hurt him.

He shrugged. "Whichever, I guess." It was going to hurt either way, after all. Fortunately he tended to use his legs more than his arms when he swam or surfed. Suddenly he sat up, rigid. What it possible that sharks could smell a blood donation wound? He knew from Asuka that the procedure left a small mark- did it leak? Ryo slapped at his hand and he realized he'd been chewing his fingernails.

The nurse smiled and spread a blanket over his legs. "Just relax, honey. I always hit the vein the first time."

Fubuki's eyes shot open and his hand gripped Ryo's tightly enough to leave bruises. What the hell did she mean by that? He breathed in slow, deep breaths as she wound the bag around his arm and handed him a small, squishy ball to squeeze to get the veins pumping. He squeezed it so hard he was amazed it didn't crumble in his fingers. She marked the vein's position and…oh God he was going to be sick-

"Fubuki, look at me!" Ryo said suddenly. Fubuki whipped his head toward Ryo just in time for a sharp pain to flash through his arm. He shut his eyes and tensed…and then it was gone.

"You did it, Bucky," Ryo beamed. He rewarded his friend with a kiss on the cheek. "I'm so proud of you."

Fubuki let out a long, slow breath and smiled, rolling the ball between his fingers. "Thanks, Ryo."

"You did great, honey," the nurse smiled. "The hard part's over. Now you can just sit back and relax until you're done." She disappeared into a corner office for a bit, then returned with a brochure and handed it to him. "Here, look that over and see what you think."

Fubuki opened it up. "Hero Rewards?" he read aloud, puzzled.

"Mhm. Whenever you donate blood, you earn points on your donor account. You can use those points to buy all kinds of stuff. My niece bought an iPad with hers."

"No kidding!" Fubuki grinned wickedly at Ryo. "You never told me I could get cool stuff for doing this." He flipped through the pages and nearly jumped out of his chair. Besides iPads, there were gift cards, game consoles, DVD players, and even phones. He felt that familiar itch crawl up his arm, the one that always caused him to max out his and occasionally Ryo's credit cards on Amazon. The itch to spend.

Ryo frowned and narrowed his eyes, probably already guessing what Fubuki was feeling. "You don't donate blood for stuff, Bucky. You do it because people need it."

Fubuki waved him off. "Details. But seriously, you should have told me about this. I'd have been over here in a heartbeat." He turned a page. "Holy crap, is that a laptop? I'd take a million needles for that."

"Well, you deserve it for being a hero," the nurse told him, smiling. Ryo gave her a dirty look, not wanting Fubuki to get any encouragement. "But the important thing is, you helped save three people just by donating this one time."

"Whoa, look at that digital camera!" He glanced up at the nurse. "Put me down as a regular. I have to get it."

Ryo snatched the brochure away. "You know, there's also the part about saving human lives," he reminded him impatiently. "That's kind of important."

Fubuki craned his neck over Ryo's shoulder. "And it even comes with batteries!"

Ryo sighed, giving up. "Good to know where your priorities lie, Fubuki."

The nurse giggled. "As long as he keeps donating, it doesn't really matter what his reason is." She checked the bag, which had filled up quickly. "Oh, you're just about done."

Fubuki looked up from where he'd been drooling over a flat screen and gulped. "Is taking the needle out as painful as putting it in?"

"Worse," Ryo said, winking at the nurse. "They say your skin comes out with it." Fubuki's eyes widened and he trembled a little bit.

The nurse gently took hold of the needle. "You can do this, Fubuki. Just close your eyes and take a deep breath." He obeyed, tensed, and waited for her to rip the needle out of his arm. When nothing happened, he opened his eyes and looked at her. His mouth dropped open when he saw that the needle was already out of his arm and in her hand.

"H-how'd you do that?"

She shrugged and giggled. "I just took the needle out, that's all."

"But I didn't feel a thing! Ryo said my skin would come off."

"Ryo also said that Hawaiian shirt was flattering," Ryo teased. Fubuki glared and whacked him with his good arm.

"So does this mean we're done and I can go?" Fubuki asked, squirming impatiently. He had to stake out the best places on the beach to use that camera.

"Just relax for a minute and let your body recuperate. Here, have a snack." The nurse handed him a rice cake, which he gratefully took and began to munch on.

Ryo squeezed his hand. "Thank you for doing this, Fubuki. I'm sure the people who receive your blood will be really grateful."

"Don't try to butter me up, Ryo," Fubuki said with a mouth full of rice cake. That digital camera is mine!"

Ryo sighed and shook his head, but he couldn't hold back a smile. At least his boyfriend would know the joy of giving.