AkuRoku: Paopu

Day 1

I pulled on my ebony tux, so extremely uncomfortable. Today was the day I would humiliate myself in front of a crowd of easily over one-thousand. If I had the choice I would be at home, lounging in loose pajamas and drinking hot cocoa, but no. I had to come to this stupid place, to do this stupid recital, because of my stupid dad.

Stupid life!

I sighed irritably and straightened up as I heard my name called from the center stage. I felt a hard pat on the back from my father and nodded, strutting from behind the classic red curtain and to the black piano in the sight of everyone. A bright light hit my face immediately as I entered, and as I sat down on the bench it intensified.

I swallowed the spit that had gathered in my mouth and cracked my knuckles practically, letting out a soft breath. They announced my name once more and what I would be playing, "The Other Promise", originally composed by Yoko Shimomura.

As my fingers began the sad tune I let my eyes close shut, my memory guiding my hands up and down the keys as I enjoyed my own dramatic presentation. This was always my favorite song, and I had begged my piano teacher to let me play it. He had given in because he knew it was the one song I could play with all my heart.

Before I knew it I felt my eyes straying to the side, peeking open to identify where the sudden glare was coming from. I had felt it aimed at me for at least a minute now, but I thought that was just the crowd in general. Now I felt someone staring at me so intensely it made me fidget and miss a key. I heard a collective gasp go through the people and quickly recovered the melody, gaping at my own mistake. No! This was supposed to be perfect!

I would find the person who made me mess up, and I would personally cut their liver out.

Before long my turn on the stage was over and I was sulking back to behind the curtain, where my angry father lay waiting for the chance to chastise me.

"How could you-?" He began but my teacher appeared, holding a hand in front of my father to ward him off. I sighed thankfully and looked up to my redheaded savior, who was only three years older than me but by far a better pianist in every way. He'd made it into Juliard at only fifteen, and since then had made his way around the world for recitals and competitions for hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Sephiroth, my silver haired, aquamarine-eyed father glared down at me before walking off stiffly, shooting me a look that read 'I'll get you later for this.'

Axel, my wonderful God of a piano teacher who was nice enough to teach me, turned to me and leaned down to give me a hug. I wrapped my arms around him and inhaled his strong, overpowering cinnamon scent that was just purely... him. When he pulled back he gave me a small, tender smile that reached even his jade eyes.

"I... Axel I'm sorry..."

"Don't be." He hushed, placing a long finger over my lips. I couldn't help but blush, he was just so charming... "You did wonderfully."

"But I-" He took my chin in his delicate hands and stared into my bigger, bluer eyes. I immediately stopped, breathless as I too gazed into his almond shaped emeralds.

"Roxas listen to me. Just because one note-"

"One note means everything-!"

"Shh!" He pouted cutely. "Are you going to let me speak?"

I pouted as well and nodded. He continued, "Just because one note misses doesn't mean the whole song is ruined. And don't mind your father, he just..."

I removed Axel's hand from my face and scowled down at the ground. "He bet on me again didn't he?"

The redhead stood to his full height and nodded, patting down his black silk shirt. I watched as he placed his hands on his feminine hips, swaying them absently. It still amazed me how a 20 year old could be so... well... amazing. He wasn't a partier or a drunk, he was sophisticated and wise but in a way that made him seem so... sweet.

"Come on, let's have some ice cream. My treat." He winked down at me and I smiled thankfully.

"Thanks, but let me change first."

He slung an arm around my shoulder and walked me out of the building. "Of course my little paopu."

Day 2

I'm not sure when it was that I first realized I was in love with Axel. Surely it wasn't yesterday, because I'd felt this butterfly-in-the-stomach feeling for well over a year now. Was it when he first took me out for ice cream when I'd cried over how horrible my father was? Or maybe it was when his hands had first guided mine over the many black and white keys of the piano.

Maybe it was when he came up with his nickname for me; Paopu. They were a starfruit that grew around here on Destiny Islands, and ever since I showed Axel the tree in my backyard (well it was a beach really) that grew them that had been my name. He said that I was a little blonde star.

I sighed once more, lying sprawled out on my bed. I couldn't help but think of him every day, every moment, every second of my life. Sure, he was nothing to be sad about, but the fact that I could never have him brought tears to my eyes.

I could have everything else, money, clothes, diamonds and pearls, a house in every country of the world, heck, I could probably even buy a country and name it Roxas-land if I wanted. But I didn't want a single bit of it.

I wanted only Axel. Only for him to be mine, his musky cinnamon smell, his blood-red hair that bounced whenever he moved, those tantalizing green eyes that followed me closely... I wanted it all.

"Axeeeel!" I whined into the air just as my bedroom door was opened.

"Whining about your lover again?" I heard a sarcastic voice above me, followed by another, "Awww don't be mean Zexy! He's in love just like us!"

I sat up and saw my two best friends, Zexion, an equally short, blue haired, sarcastic little emo fuzzball; and Demyx, the exact opposite of his blunette boyfriend and lover, with his tall, built body and his messy mohawk and mullet of blonde hair.

"Why are you guys here?" I queried, gazing at the two with curiosity.

"We just wanted to come by and say hello." Demyx added cheerily compared to Zexion rolling his silver eyes. The blonde one opposite me smiled sweetly. "We thought you might be lonely thinking about Axel. And after your mess up last night-"

"Demyx!" Zexion chastised and smacked his teal-eyed boyfriend's hand.

"Whaaat? He did!" Demyx complained. I laughed at how blunt he was, standing and greeting the both of them.

"Zexion it's fine, I did mess up." I argued lightly, and for a while Zexion tried to convince me that I did just the opposite, but it was a feeble attempt. There was no changing my mind, especially when it came to piano.

By the end of the day they had decided to spend the night, and they lay on the floor passed out and surrounded by multiple candy and popcorn bowls. At some point we had come up with the idea that since I was so 'depressed' I should sleep in the middle of the two so I wouldn't feel left out, so now I was stuck between my two best friends as they slept soundly. Instead, I lie awake staring up at the ceiling, far from a peaceful dream world.

I rolled over to face Zexion's pale, thin face. I studied his one visible eye, and seeing as it was closed, all I was able to gaze at was the thick black eyeliner he applied every other hour. Well, it wasn't actually eyeliner, it was a tube of black lipstick he carried with him everywhere. In his sleep his slim pink lips were puckered slightly, like he was pouting about something Demyx had said (like he usually was).

I flipped again to look at Demyx instead, seeing his boyish tan face. Strands of his hair were laying in his eyes sloppily, his odd standing up hairstyle drooping a bit. I sighed sadly. Staring at both of them wasn't going to help me fall asleep.

Once again, I faced the ceiling and closed my eyes.

It turns out closing my eyes wasn't the best idea either. My mind filled with images of Axel, the way his thin lips always smiled at my kindly, and the way he always, always made sure I wasn't feeling sad or disappointed with myself.

I couldn't help but think about his body too though. His hips and the way he always swayed them when he was bored, or his neck and collarbone and how it all looked so... delicious.

I hid my face under the covers and squealed quietly. I could NOT think about him or this was going to get really bad! As in I'd be needing a cold shower bad!

Day 3

"Roxas..."

I heard my name being called again and knew I needed to wake, the recital must be starting.

"Roxy?"

If I didn't get up soon my dad would be pissed, he'd probably throw a tantrum. I had to get dressed, the announcer was calling my name, I couldn't mess this up...

"Roooxyyy wake uuup!"

"Can't..." I mumbled, finally giving up and turning my face into surprisingly warm covers. I thought I was sleeping on the floor... with Zexion and Demyx... wait...

I shot upwards and looked around, seeing a smiling redhead above me. For a moment I gazed at familiar, perfectly tantalizing lips, unable to look away in my half-sleep...

"Good morning paopu butt." Axel grinned mischievously and I blinked.

"Axel...? Why are you-?"

"Shhh." He held a finger up to my lips and I blushed uncertainly, wondering what was going on. I glanced to the floor and saw that indeed, I had been moved to the bed while Zexion and Demyx were cuddled up on the floor. I stared into his emerald eyes with curiosity, wondering what he was up to.

Axel suddenly took my hand and guided me from the bed and out into the long hallway, down the stairs to the first floor. My heart thumped erratically all the while. Where was he taking me? Was he... maybe he was going to tell me he loved me? And then we'd run away together after he showered me with roses and chocolates, and we'd make love under the moonlight and...

"I got you some new piano music."

I felt my heart stop. Oh. Sure, I might be acting dramatic, but for a split second I had thought... just maybe...

No, that would be too good to be true.

I cautiously sat down in front of my Steinway grand, fidgeting with the papers he handed me. He smiled and sat next to me.

"See, there's two versions of the song. We could play together if you want!" He exclaimed happily and I nodded, staring down at the black and white keys. It wasn't that big of a deal. He just had some more sheets... that was all...

No, that was the problem. All it ever was was piano. Piano this, piano that, why couldn't all the piano's in the world just go freaking burn?

I immediately chastised myself for ever even thinking that. If there was no music like that, then Axel would be heartbroken, as would I.

I sighed miserably, "What's the song?"

"Dearly Beloved. Around ten minutes long."

I felt a sharp pang through my heart and nodded again. I gazed around the room with pure sorrow. My father had built me this room solely for my lessons. It was windows on all sides, the walls were all white. The light of the six o' clock sunrise streamed in through the glass, reflecting on the shiny black coat that covered my grand. Axel and I sat side by side, and as he set the sheet music down I slowly began the deeper tone, not a cheery one, but more of a hopeful kind.

Axel followed in with the lighter, butterfly-like high notes on the opposite side of the piano. At one point I idly played and began staring at him, his eyes closed. The sun created a halo around him, one that made him look like the angel he was.

I glanced at the music and saw the change in attitude, instead reaching down further to pound at the keys emotionally. Only a moment later the music flowed back into it's original peaceful tune, where I stopped playing all together and instead it was just Axel and his flitting high keys.

Tears welled in my eyes as I gazed at him. How? How could he be so... so perfect? So amazing? How could he sit here and be so at peace with himself and the world while I, on the other hand, was nearly dying because of my unrequited love for him?

How would I possibly go on and live without him?

I suddenly lifted my hands from the piano altogether, tears streaming down my flushed cheeks. I wouldn't be able to. There was no way in my right mind that I would ever be able to go on like this. Axel... he had to know.

"Roxas," Axel paused in the song, his last few notes echoing around the circular room. "What's wro-"

"I love you."

I stared straight ahead, sniffling quietly. My voice gave out, so my next words were whispers. "I love you... so much Axel."

I heard his breathing stop and I dared to look up at him. He was staring at me, his cheeks a perfect shade of pink. His hands had dropped to his lap, his entire body seemed to be in permanent shock.

Something like a whimper and a sob came out of my mouth as I gazed up at him, my vision becoming blurred as I tried to keep my eyes open. I wasn't sure how I'd done it, but I'd managed to tell him my feelings. I'd managed to ruin our friendship forever.

"R-Ro..." He stammered out and looked like he was going to begin to comfort me, but he was almost scared to touch me. He gulped and let out a shaky sigh. "R-Roxas... I..."

"Don't! I-I don't want to hear it!" I stood and held myself in a hug. "I d-don't want to hear your lame excuse about how it won't work out! I know you don't love me! I never expected you to anyway!"

I took a few steps backwards. Axel looked horrified. "Just- Just leave me alone-!"

I turned on my heels and wanted to run away, wanted to lock myself up in my room and never, never come out.

"No." I heard his surprisingly steady voice as he stood as well and grabbed my wrist, turning me back around. "I will never leave you alone."

Pure ecstasy. No, it was pure love. It was chaste. It was sweet and innocent and perfect, but it was strong and forceful and needed.

His kiss was... everything and so much more.

I felt his hands slide down to rest on my hips, pulling me as close as humanly possible without hurting me. I could imagine the peaceful piano music once more, but this time it was as happy as my heart felt now. My eyes slowly slid shut at the same time as his.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, trying to pull myself upwards to match his height even just a little. I smiled through my tears as he did too, moving his lips against mine with utter carefulness.

He pulled away slightly and opened his eyes, showing his shining green eyes. "Roxas..."

I savored the way he said my name with such love. He leaned his nose against mine and I tightened him in my hug. He continued, "Roxas I love you. I always have."

I raised my eyebrows in confusion. "But why..."

"Why didn't I tell you sooner?" He smiled sheepishly. "I'm shy."

I almost laughed at how cute he could be somtimes. I rested my head against his chest for a moment, listening to his rapid heartbeat. He was just as excited as I was.

"Axel..." I whispered his name with utter love. Everything would be alright now.

"What is it, paopu?" He whispered back, nuzzling my hair.

"Let's finish our song."