Hi! This is my first story (my first Teen Titans story AND my first story on this site!) so hopefully you like it! I tried to make sure the characters were not too out of character. One day I was casually listening to Death Cab For Cutie and this idea popped into my head. It was a little strange, but it stuck in my head so much that I just had to write it. I hope you enjoy it! P.S. Sadly I do not own Teen Titans or any other DC characters.
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Yet another groan escaped past my lips. I didn't mean it to, but I couldn't stop it even if I tried. My head ached from my concussion, and my leg throbbed dully in my plaster cast on my leg. As if the constant aching wasn't unbearable, I had the constant fussing of Beast Boy and Cyborg, which wasn't exactly helpful. Beast Boy kept trying to feed me strange tofu concoctions, and Cyborg kept trying to convince me to play video games with him. Obviously, they were both shot down almost immediately on several occasions.
After an hour or so of trying to wipe the deep scowl off my face without success, they finally left me alone. Raven took her turn next, taking a seat next to me on the couch. Her usually stoic face was soft and concerned. It wasn't obvious to the regular onlooker, but I knew her well enough to know.
"Robin, just ignore them. They only make headaches worse," she told me harshly, throwing a glare in the direction of Beast Boy and Cyborg, who were arguing in the kitchen about their failed attempts to cheer me up. Catching the glare, both boys smiled sheepishly and fearfully, then quickly retreated to their rooms. Raven grinned triumphantly. "There. Much better."
"Thanks, Raven," I started to say, my voice sounding anything but thankful. Damn this headache. "I appreciate you trying to help, but it wasn't just them giving me this killing headache. I've had it since this morning." It was true. Since my accident, the pounding headache hasn't stopped.
"Maybe there's something I can do about that. I can't fix your concussion, but I may be able to help relieve some of your pain," Raven told me coolly, not phased at all by my agitation. She got up off the couch, stood behind me, and placed her hands lightly on my temples. She rubbed lightly on the area and closed her eyes in concentration. Within seconds, her hands glowed with her dark magic, and a warm sensation consoled my temples. It was like taking a warm heater to my head, and added with the light pressure of the massage, it felt better.
I laid my head back on the sofa, still allowing Raven to work her magic. I felt my shoulders relax a bit for the first time that day. I closed my eyes to focus on the relaxing massage. I took a deep breath and tried to let my mind go blank. But without even trying, I only saw my accident this morning. As soon as the sun came up, we got a call from one of the banks in Jump City. It wasn't unusual. We went into the city and started our work, swiftly defeating the robber. But when we went to leave, the robber in hand, we were ambushed. Without warning, Slade showed himself. With ease, Slade took down each of us, one by one. Not surprisingly, he saved me for last.
He was quick, agile, and strong. It was the same as every fight we've encountered before. Hand to hand, we fought. He threw a punch right to my face, and I ducked at just the right moment. He followed it up with a strong kick to my side, which I rolled away from, and landed on my feet a number of feet away from him. He gave me a pointed look, his one uncovered eye staring straight at me.
"Well now, Robin, that's quite the move. Might I ask where you learned that from?" he asked, his low voice filled with false curiosity.
I let out a strong breath. "I had a good teacher," I replied vaguely.
"No doubt the best," Slade said, not surprised by my lack of information. "Tell me, do you speak to your former mentor? Gotham is not all that far away."
I took a step closer to him, ready to spring. No one has questioned my past since I moved to this city. It was not something I was fond of speaking of. If I ever brought up the subject of my life before the Teen Titans, uncomfortable questions were always inevitable. "No, Slade. I do not have any contact with that city. I have a new team here, and that is what you should be more concerned with right now." I tried my best to sound threatening, but my uneasiness made it harder than usual.
"Now, Robin, look around. Are your friends coming to save you? No. So I do believe I have a free minute to ask a few questions."
My muscles tensed and my fists squeezed together in rage. How dare he underestimate my friends! "We'll see about that." I gritted. And with that, I lunged at him.
The fighting continued just as it did before, just this time, I was filled with rage. I threw punches at him as if my life depended on it, but none of them made their mark. They were always blocked, always redirected. I kicked and lunged, but he mirrored my attacks. However, I was not quite as good at blocking him. Within a couple of moments, he went to land a kick on me once more. I attempted to lunge away from it, but I wasn't quick enough. I took the kick hard to the side of my lower leg, just below my knee. With a groan, I landed hard on the pavement a couple feet away.
Slade stepped over to me, looking at me in mock pity. "Now, now, Robin. You can do better than that, can't you? I know you have a good lineage for agility. Having acrobatic parents sure does help."
My body went cold. How did he know? How did he know about me?
He gave a bitter laugh at the look on my astonished face. "But I don't blame you for tripping up like they had. Accidents are always a possibility." And once he finished, he gave a loud, sickening laugh.
My heart dropped in my chest and my head reeled. How could he possibly know about my parents? He knew so much about my past- the past that I've kept locked up for years. I never openly shared my fractured past with my friends, let alone my arch enemy. My team only knew about my parents because of the limited information that Raven shared with them for their own good after she entered my mind. But the only one who knew the full extent of my life was back somewhere in Gotham.
And before I knew what I was doing, I snapped. I threw myself at him, fists clenched. But as soon as I pushed off the ground, my leg that Slade kicked gave out from under me and it burned all over. The pain was dizzying, but I pushed past it. I ran limply at Slade, but I was finished. Before I could even get a punch in, Slade took one last shot, a swing at my head. I couldn't block it, and everything went black.
The next thing I remembered was waking up in Titans Tower, my leg in a cast and all of my team anxiously trying to wake me up. And since then, I hadn't had a moments peace from Cyborg and Beast Boy until Raven showed up.
"Robin," Raven said firmly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I didn't answer. She knew I was listening. "Robin, you can't beat yourself up over this. Slade had the better hand this time. We caught the thief, so Slade didn't get what he was after. "
"I know, I know. That's not what I was worried about, though," I said stubbornly. It's true that Slade did not get what he sent the thief to do, but I had a feeling he still got what he wanted today.
"What are you worried about?"
I didn't answer.
Raven let out a sigh, and she removed her hands from my temples. "Robin, I don't know what's bothering you, but you have to let it go. It will help you. Don't get fed up with whatever Slade said to you. It doesn't matter. He was probably only trying to throw you off your game. Don't let him win."
I knew she was right, but I felt violated. This was very personal information that Slade had shared. I didn't want just anyone to know all about me. My past is what made me who I am today.
Ignoring my lack of a response, Raven continued. "Don't blame yourself. Accidents happen."
"Yeah, and that's the problem," I replied vehemently.
And with that, I fled the room.
Without knowing where my feet were taking me, I ended up at the rooftop of the tower, the sunlight hidden behind steel grey clouds. With a loud sigh, I sat down gingerly at the edge of the roof, careful not to bump my casted leg. I mulled over Raven's words. Accidents happen. Me more than anyone should know that. But since that fateful day, I made sure that accidents didn't happen to me.
Footsteps behind me cut into my thoughts, and I rolled my eyes. Couldn't anyone in this tower see that I wanted to be alone?
"Just leave me alone. I'm fine, I swear," I said without looking over my shoulder. My voice was more stinging than I intended, but I didn't care if it got the job done.
"I'm sorry, but I was just concerned," a familiar voice said quietly, the hurt obvious. And I immediately wished I could stuff all those words back in my mouth.
I spun around, my face apologetic and surprised, and my eyes landed on a dejected Starfire. Her left arm was gripping her right elbow, and her head was dropped down. Her pretty lips were tight and frowning, her brow furrowed in confusion. Her usually bright emerald eyes were glassy with the promise of tears, and the concern and hurt in them were unmistakable. I wanted to slap myself because I knew that I was the cause of her emotions.
"Starfire…" I trailed off, my voice a muddle of emotions. I regretted being short with her and causing her concern, but a small part of me was unfailingly happy that she cared this much for me.
I could've sworn I'd just seen her sniffle when she said, "I see that you wish to be alone, so I'll be down in my room."
As she turned away, I panicked. I didn't want her to leave. Everyone else in the tower was making me tenser. But Starfire was the only one who could make me forget my wallowing self-pity. Without thinking, I shot my hand out to grab her wrist, and I twisted to put my weight on my lame leg. A shot of pain electrocuted my leg, and I dropped back on the floor with a groan. But I never let go of Starfire's hand.
Immediately, Starfire dropped down on the floor next to me and gripped my hand tightly as she laid her other hand lightly on my bad knee. A spark shot through my leg, but it wasn't unpleasant this time.
"Robin, are you alright?" she asked me, the concern obvious in her voice. Her eyes searched mine, but I knew she wouldn't find out anything. Damn this mask.
Shakily and still in pain, I mumbled, "Please stay."
Her face softened, and I couldn't decern the emotions in it. She looked relieved, but I wasn't entirely sure why.
"Of course, Robin," she said softly. "I will stay with you if that is what you wish for. I want you to be comfortable."
I gave a chuckle. Even when I was this tense, she still managed to make me smile. "I can definitely say that it is more comfortable up here than downstairs with Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Raven fussing over me."
Her pretty lips curled into a small smile. She looked away from me and up at the sky. For several minutes, we fell into a comfortable silence. She never looked at me, but I kept stealing glances at her. She looked slightly on edge, her arms wrapped around her knees, which were pulled up to her chest. She rested her chin on her knees and looked distantly off into the sky, her emotions hard to read. I couldn't tell what she was thinking about, which was uncommon. Usually, she was open with her thoughts, telling them aloud for anyone around to hear. And when we were alone, she would even share her negative feelings with me. This was very unusual, and that worried me.
Without warning, I caught her eyes flickering over to me, and we met our gazes. Immediately, I tore my eyes away, heat rushing to my cheeks. She caught me staring right at her. But, a giddy feeling in my stomach surfaced at the thought that not only had she caught me looking, but I caught her sneaking a glance.
"Robin," Starfire started, her voice hushed so quietly I almost had trouble hearing her despite our close proximity. After a pause, she continued, "Are you sure you are alright?"
I mumbled my usual answer to her. "I don't know, Star. This concussion is pretty annoying and this broken leg is going to get in the way for the next couple of weeks, but besides that…"
She gave me a look that stopped my ramble. "No, Robin. Are you alright?"
The question caught me off guard. She seemed to drop the subject of my wellbeing after I asked her to stay. I was just about to lie and say that I was fine, just as I did with all my other friends, when I made the mistake of looking at her. I looked back into her eyes- those beautiful, searching, worried, emerald eyes- I felt the words get caught in my throat. Starfire was here, looking so concerned and anxious, that I couldn't bring myself to lie to her. I had a feeling she would see through a lie anyway.
I let out a deep, ragged breath and looked back down at the floor again. "I don't know, Star. Slade today was mocking me, which isn't unusual. But what he was saying today really stuck with me, and I can't shake it." I tried not to be too specific. I felt completely comfortable with Starfire. I knew she wouldn't judge me or my past, nor would she pity me like so many others. She wouldn't treat me any different, and for that I was grateful. But her life was so happy, and that was something that mine was not.
She peered into my shrouded eyes, searching fruitlessly for something more. "Would you like to share? Sometimes talking about it can help you overcome it," she said gently, trying not to push me more than I was willing to go.
"It's a tough story, Star," I warned, unsure if she knew what I was about to tell her.
She shook her head. "If it will help you, I am willing to listen."
How did I get so lucky?
I let out a long breath. "Alright. Well, Slade was taunting me with my past. For some reason, he managed to learn all about me before I started fighting crime, and I don't know how."
She looked puzzled. "He must have heard from another villain. Maybe he knows one who resides outside of our city."
"I wouldn't be surprised," I mumbled dejectedly. I had no idea that many people knew about me. But if Slade has contacts outside Jump City, it must not be as hard as I thought. "But he continued on, referencing my old work and focusing on my parents." My voice got softer and softer as I spoke, and at first, I feared that Starfire didn't hear me.
At my words, she frowned indignantly. "How dare he! That's not something to ridicule others about." She seemed so offended, and I had to suppress a smile when I thought that she was this angry on my behalf.
"He knew it would throw me off my game. While he was distracted, he hurt my leg, then told me that 'accidents were always possible.'"
Repeating his words made me tense in anger again, which didn't go unnoticed by Starfire.
She laid a hand on my shoulder, and a tingle ran down my arm. "Robin, I'm sorry he brought up this subject to you. If you do not wish to talk about it, I understand. I do not want to force you if it is painful."
I shook my head. "I just can't stand it. Ever since the day that my parents died, I have been set on making sure accidents don't happen. I trained to become capable of fighting, worked in Gotham for years, and taken down villain after villain to ensure that something like what happened to me doesn't happen to another. And despite all my efforts, I still couldn't avoid this. I'm useless now." With a broken leg and a concussion, there was no way for me to fight, which was something that has never happened before. I didn't like the feeling either.
"Robin, don't say that! You are not useless! You have never been and you will never be," Starfire said, exasperated. Her eyes were glassy once more, and I felt terrible for doing this to her once again.
"But I can't fight, Star. I can barely walk without wincing, let alone fight. If I can't prevent another accident, then I'm worthless."
Starfire stared back at me, her eyes angry. "Robin, I have known you for some time now. You are determined, brave, and smart. You are a wonderful fighter and you will be able to fight again. Don't forget how important you are to our city and to us as a team." She paused for a moment, and her voice grew softer and more gentle as she continued to speak. "You are important to me."
My stomach knotted up at her soft confession. I was important to her? It was such a vague statement, and I had to keep myself from over thinking her words. I mean Raven, Beast Boy, and Cyborg were all important to Starfire. I guess it would only make sense that I was too. She couldn't have meant anything special by it. She probably didn't realize that on Earth, that statement could mean a lot.
"But how am I important? I can't do anything to help you guys fight for quite some time. This leg puts me out of commission for weeks."
Her eyes flashed with a brief glow of anger. The gentle, warm expression she just wore was gone. I could see her becoming more upset. But I mean it's not hard to tell when her eyes glow softly green when she's exasperated.
"Robin," she said, her stern and commanding voice silencing me in a second, "I can't bear to hear you say these horrible things about yourself. Just because you can't fight does not mean that you are worthless. You are strong willed, determined, and diligent. Even if you are not actively fighting crime, you will surely still keep your attention on it. It is part of who you are."
I was taken back by her words, the brash and blatant observation truer that I ever would have admitted. It was true, and that was why it was so surprising. Starfire was right to a T; I'm diligent, I'm determined, I'm strong willed. Honestly, I could almost say that I'm obsessive. But for it to be a part of my personality? A part of who I am? I was ashamed to say it, but being a superhero was mostly what defined me now.
With a long sigh, I hung my head and dropped my gaze from Starfire's. "Oh, Star, if only you had known me before the accident…"
I could feel Starfire's gaze bearing down on me, but I didn't meet it.
"Robin, why do you say that?"
I squirmed in my place, regretting that I ever brought up the subject. "I didn't really mean anything by it…" I lied.
A soft touch on my forearm shot heat straight up my arm to my shoulder and finally landing in my chest. Against my will, my heart kicked up its speed and I could feel it thumping in my chest. My eyes peered at her hand on my arm, and then they trailed up her arm, then her shoulder, and settled on her emerald gaze. Her worried, pleading eyes captivated me, pulling down my walled defenses around my feelings one brick at a time.
"Robin, please. Talk to me."
I sighed once more and spilled before I could change my mind. "Focused, determined, diligent, strong willed. It's me. But the only reason I'm like that today is because I have to fight crime. But before I ever became a superhero, I was nothing like I am today. I was gentle, calm, and kind before," I paused and let out a shaky breath, feeling my heart leap in my mouth, "before my parents died."
Starfire stayed utterly quiet. Her expression hadn't changed. There was no sign she even heard what I had to say. A cold sweat broke on my forehead, and my gloved hands felt clammy. Here I just spilled one of my most vulnerable secrets to Starfire, and I just wanted her to speak. I wanted her to break the awkward silence that descended. I stayed quiet for a few moments, and she still did not speak. I decided to break it myself.
"I was nothing like I am today. I was much more agreeable and not as cynical. My parents' murder hardened me into who I am today. Sometimes I think that people, my friends, and even you would have liked the old me better."
And with that, Starfire finally reacted. She looked as if I just slapped her. Her eyes grew wide and she gasped quietly in surprise.
"Robin! Why would you ever say such a thing? I may not have known you before the accident, but that does not matter to me." She grew more quiet and sincere, the anger draining from her face as she continued. "To me, you are Robin, a strong, smart, motivated man who works to keep others safe. Yes, sometimes you can be stubborn, but it is nothing bad. You are gentle and kind. You were the first friend I made on this planet. You welcomed me at a time when I was isolated and dangerous, and when I was alone and strange. You did not care if I was of a different race or from a different planet. You trusted me and I trusted you. You always strive to be the best you can, no matter what the situation is. And you care about this city and all the people who live here. You fight strongly to protect them, even though it may cost you. To me, you are the kindest, most selfless, and determined person I know. So to me, it does not matter that I did not know you before the accident. To me, you are perfect the way you are now."
When she finished, she dropped her gaze into her lap ans wrung her fingers, seemingly embarrassed by just how much she said.
I blinked in surprise at her, too stunned and overjoyed by her confession to utter a word. One thought raced back and forth through my mind, overwhelming me. And before I let myself convince me that it was a bad idea, I acted on it.
I leaned in and kissed her.
It was quick. I brushed my lips lightly over hers, barely a ghost of a kiss. Immediately I pulled away from her, avoiding her eyes. Heat rose in my cheeks and I felt regret wash over my head. I mentally kicked myself, trying to desperately come up with an excuse to cover up for the brief intimate moment. But I didn't get a chance. A soft hand laid on my cheek and before I could turn my head to look at Starfire, she turned my head to hers and pressed her lips to mine.
It was gentle, timid. We were both inexperienced and nervous, afraid of each other's rejection. But bravely, I pressed a bit more, bringing my hand up gently, trailing my fingers up her bare arm. I felt her shiver, and it encouraged me on. I brought my hands up to rest on her shoulders and the nape of her neck. She, growing a bit more confident, moved easily with me and deepened the kiss. It was intoxicating. The feeling of her soft skin and her silky hair, her delicate lips, her floral scent, and her hands laying gently on my shoulders made my mind grow hazy and slow, my thoughts drowsy and my head swimming.
We reluctantly pulled away for a moment, but I kept my forehead resting on hers, our breaths mingling. We stayed quiet for a moment, reveling in the bliss of the past moment. My head reeled with thoughts, excitement, panic, and bliss.
I kissed Starfire.
I kissed her.
I kissed my teammate, my alien partner, my best friend.
I kissed Starfire.
And even better yet, she kissed me, too.
Her soft words broke me from my trance. "Robin, please remember. Accidents can happen to the best of us, no matter how hard we try to prevent them. You may not be perfect all the time, but that does not matter. To me, you are perfect just the way you are."
I couldn't stop the giant toothy grin that rose to my cheeks. Seeing me smile for the first time that day, she giggled and flashed me a mirroring smile. And with that, I leaned in for another kiss.
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Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! Please feel free to comment! Help is always welcome :)