A/N: Before the story begins, That Gamer wants me to clarify that humanized names are being used here, which means that Vinyl Scratch is Violet Scott and Twilight Sparkle is Tara Sparks. OK? OK. He also ships Twinyl. On with the story.

Something About Boobs
Written by That Gamer and Hellfilly Deluxe
Edited by Hellfilly Deluxe
Pre-read and rated by TheEquestrianIdiot 2.0
Inspired by and uses Galaxyart's "Insecurities"

"...Violet, is there something wrong?" Tara asked, looking at her half-naked girlfriend from the doorway of her room.

"Of course there's something wrong!" Violet answered. She didn't even look away from her reflection to say that. How rude. "My boobs are too fucking small! They're like... Two whole cup sizes smaller than yours. Like, I never got good grades in class-"

"But I'm getting B's now," Tara finished for Violet with a sigh.

Violet finally looked away from the mirror to give Tara a confused look.

"How did you know I was gonna say that?" Violet asked, her tone sharing the same expression as her face.

"You've said that every time you've complained about this," Tara explained, finally coming into the room. "Word for word, the same thing. I could recite it all now, but we'd be here for another two hours. Violet, as I've said in the past, you're a whole size bigger than me. How on Earth do you think those are B's?"

"I just see things differently then you," Violet said in that "you oughta know" tone before turning back to her reflection.

"Clearly..." Tara took a few moments to think over Violet's comment and all the previous times she had whined about her breast size. She loved the girl to death, but it could get really annoying sometimes, if this was any indication. Regardless, it didn't take long for her to come to a reasonable conclusion: "Violet, I think you need better glasses."

"What? No!" Violet turned to Tara again, obviously not believing what she was hearing. "These glasses have worked fine for me for years! I can read, I can write, I can see you fine..."

"But if you're seeing these as B's," Tara put a finger on one of Violet's boobs, probably for emphasis or something, "there's clearly something wrong with your vision."

"There's nothing wrong!" Violet said, swatting Tara's hand away. "I just think my boobs could be bigger!"

"Do we really have to go over the whole 'it's not what's on the outside' thing again?" Tara asked. "'Cause to be honest, I'm getting a little sick of reciting it."

"You don't have to recite anything," Violet said. "My boobs are just too small!"

"They're not..." Not even halfway through what was supposed to be a full sentence, Tara had to sigh. There really was no getting through to her this way. So naturally, she had to go with a different approach. "How about this? How about I measure your bust size, and if it's above D, will you stop complaining?"

"Fine," Violet huffed. "But I'm telling you, it's a solid B."

Tara didn't respond to that, instead just going downstairs to find her measuring tape. In the meantime, Violet stared at her reflection some more and felt sorry for herself. The poor thing was suffering.

"OK, so I got myself a 34-band," Tara started as she came back in after a few minutes. "I think Rachel gave it to me, since she's the only one who would have use for this... Which actually makes me wonder why she would give this to me, but that's not the point. So, Violet, I need you to take your bra off."

"Well OK, if you wanted to see 'em that badly..." Violet said, doing as she was told.

"It's to get a better reading," Tara explained. "I also just realized that we could check to see what cup size it is."

"It's lies," Violet huffed, crossing her arms. "I would trust that bra if it was the last one on Earth."

"If it was the last bra on Earth, I doubt you'd be wearing it," Tara remarked. "Anyways, let's see what size this is... Hmm... Yeah, you're 10.3 inches, so going by Wikipedia, you're a D."

"Wait, hold on, you used Wikipedia?" Violet asked, accompanied by a small laugh.

"Yeah, I did," Tara said. "And what's so wrong with that?"

"Nothing, nothing..." Violet chuckled. "It's just that... You! You're so damn smart, yet you're using Wikipedia of all things! Like... Really?"

"I'm a major of science, not breast sizes," Tara stated. "I only know what size I am because it's what on my bra."

"And you are?"

"We're not talking about my size, we're talking about yours," Tara said. "And you're a nice size."

"Yeah, but what size are you?" Violet asked. "I wanna compare. And, like, contrast or something."

"Fine. I'm a D too," Tara replied. "10.47 inches."

"See? See? I told mine were too small," Violet said.

"Violet, for the love of God, are you honestly-"

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding," Violet interrupted, snickering. "I'm fine with a D. It's good enough. I can live with this size, I guess."

"But just remember, it's what on the inside that counts," Tara said in that sort of "Mother reminding her child" way.

"Yeah, yeah, all that crap I've learned in kindergarten," Violet said, walking past Tara and out of her room. "Now c'mon, we got stuff to."

"...Are you gonna put your bra back on?" Tara called after her. "And a shirt too?"

"...Of course I was." Violet came back in, blushing slightly.

"Oh you," Tara giggled.

A/N: I have no why he wrote this, but That Gamer said something about including it an anthology later... I have no idea. Anyways, please make sure to leave a review and "Bonum nocte et fortuna".