In Any World
Color. That was the first thing he noticed about her when he saw the bespectacled woman. In the drab world that had come to surround him for the past five years she was the first flash color that resonated with him. It wasn't just because her blonde hair shimmered in light or that the soft pink shirt she wore made her pale skin seem luminescent, while the fuchsia stained lip gloss made her plump lips pop and her blue eyes blazed out from behind her two-toned frames. The colors, including the dark purple shade her nails were painted, only enhanced the internal brightness that was inherent to her and it captivated him, drawing his attention from his intended target. Years of training and self-discipline failed him the moment he first caught sight of her. A nameless figure who stood out against monotone world he had come to inhabit.
He should have left it there. A momentary hypnotic distraction, like watching a flame dance and fold in on itself; the hottest blue reaching to touch the cooler red and orange hues of its own nature. But he had been caught and the color called out to something that he believed was long dead inside him.
He completed his mission, in a less timely fashion than he had become known for, and learned about her: Felicity Smoak. She was brilliant, had a penchant for babbling which often included unintended innuendos, and had an infectious smile. Even observing her from afar he found himself returning the jubilant stretch of her lips with a slight up tick of his own. It the closest thing to a smile that had crossed his face in years.
The sensations she aroused in him kept him coming back. He needed to catch a glimpse of her and with each encounter he edged ever nearer until months later he actually stood behind her, inhaling her – the heady combination of her own unique essence and the lotion and shampoo she used – as she purchased her afternoon jolt of caffeine. Her voice was cheerful, though slightly preoccupied as she ordered and continued to scratch out her work on the pad she held in her hands.
Seeing up close how her brow furled in concentration and she bit gently into her lower lip made his breath catch and his heart tap in a quick staccato beat. He even felt his cheeks heat as he watched her, able to feel the warmth of her body with his own. Even in his life before he had not been the type of man who blushed, but she extracted things from him that he had forgotten existed, though it was quite possible that she breathed into existence elements that had never been there in the first place.
He had chosen not to speak to her then. What did color and its absence have to talk about? They may have shared that small sliver of time and space together, but their worlds were very much different.
Even knowing that and of the displeasure his distracted state caused he could not reign himself in. The discipline that had been mercilessly drilled into him, the instinct to be cautious, had been drowned out by his need, by her. He couldn't see beyond those feelings, to know how foolish and reckless he was acting, more like the carefree miscreant of his youth than the hard, calculating weapon he had been fashioned into.
It took him another two months before he finally talked to her and after that everything spiraled beyond his control. It all happened so quickly and achingly slow at the same time. It had been a whirlwind of rediscovered emotions and mundane everyday interactions that people took for granted. It started with getting Felicity to sit and drink her coffee with him and progressed from there – he got to hold her hand, hear her laugh, watch her cheeks flush in embarrassment when her mouth was too fast for her brain, feel the lush press of lips against his own, and learn the contours of body and they fit like complementary puzzle pieces against his own, and the very best thing, the explosion he felt within himself when she huskily confessed her love for him.
For all too brief of a time he felt happiness again and basked in the multifaceted hues of world. Ollie, the heedless boy he'd once been, and Al Sah-Him, the deadly weapon he had been crafted into, all faded away leaving him to be her Oliver, the man he was always meant to be – the man who loved and was loved by Felicity Smoak.
He thought he knew what he had been risking when he allowed himself the forbidden bliss of a life outside of Nanda Parbat and his liege Ra's al Ghul. Forfeiting his own life for a taste of Felicity was worth it, but that Ra's would spare him and take her had not occurred to him. It was not the League's way, but he had not taken in account Ra's ambitions for him. To make him heir, the next man to carry the title of Ra's al Ghul.
He would have seen it as an honor before that fateful day he laid eyes on Felicity, but since that moment he had been drawn towards only one future, one with her. One that he could not possibly have as a member of the League of Assassins.
Like with all things since he'd been swept out to sea away from Lian Yu and his father in the aftermath of taking on Slade Wilson, he had little choice. In fact, the last choice that had been his own before Felicity had been getting on The Gambit. What had transpired after, being sucked into the salty depths of the North China Sea surely to drown in choppy storm waters only to survive the ferocious, cold waters to become a prisoner on the Amazo. Suffering at the hands of Anthony Ivo, escaping with Anatoli to an island only to find his father very much alive and trying to find a way home with the assistance of his allies Slade and Shado; how their plan fell apart, leaving his friend recaptured, Shado dead, and Slade infected with drug that warped his mind as it strengthened his body. Once again cast into the brine, as his father battled his one-time friend, Oliver had been certain the waters would claim him. Instead the League had and Oliver Queen was burned out of him, replaced by Al Sah-Him.
He had become a brutal and efficient weapon in Ra's arsenal, his loyalty and unquestioning ability to see out his orders had him rising quickly within the League's ranks to become a favored asset. More so than he had realized.
What he found beautiful and restorative in Felicity, Ra's had seen as a threat to the future he laid out for him. An obstacle to be permanently removed. A danger so great, he had personally plunged the blade through her chest himself, before dropping a dying Felicity at his feet for him to hold in his arms as life drained from her, her blood staining him.
She has given him color back, but in the end all he had been left with was red. The red of her blood that dried from a wet brightness to a dull rust. Leaving the heat of all consuming rage burning inside him.
He had been thrown into the dungeons of Nanda Parbat, left there to contemplate his sins until Ra's saw fit. That he was expected to return to his previous state was a miscalculation on Ra's part. He would never forget or forgive, and instead of dwelling on his mistakes he plotted his revenge.
It was all he wanted – Ra's blood on his hands where he could still feel Felicity's – at least it had been until Zoom released him from his prison and told him of another Earth. A place where Felicity could still be alive. Zoom could send him there, all he required in return was the death of The Flash on the other side. An easy enough agreement to make on his part, taking life was the only thing he had ever been good at and the reward awaiting him made the impossible sounding journey worth it.
After crossing over he found her first. He would not do Zoom's bidding if what was promised him could not be fulfilled. He had been startled to find her Star City, in his world she had lived in Coast City and worked for Ferris Air helping them design the system for their most advanced aircraft, but even learning that she resided in his hometown had not thrown as much as learning that she was engaged to him.
Not him, him. This world's Oliver Queen. A playboy turned do-gooder who was running for mayor and had been unable to protect what was most precious from his enemies.
Witnessing her alive should have been a blessing, but seeing her injured because he had failed her again almost undid him. In that moment he acted just as recklessly as he had the first time he chanced upon her.
She hadn't noticed at first. He'd broken into their home and fashioned himself as her Oliver Queen. He whisked her away from her workday for an impromptu lunch and she had bubbled appreciatively at the gesture. He would have allowed the fallacy to go on, to bask again in her delight, but then Queen called her. He hated her confused fear, her struggle against him – they were things he had never seen on face directed at him and it cut deep into his soul. A soul he thought had shrivel and died upon losing her. But she was there, right in front him, with none of their shared history between them but inexplicably still his Felicity. That warm brightness, with quirky genius and a giving heart. It was ingrained within in her. He could travel to any Earth he was certain and she would always be Felicity and he would always love her.
"I won't fail you again," he promised before using the most gentle technique he knew to knock her unconscious. He could hear the frantic sound of his own voice shouting through the phone.
"Felicity! Felicity! Talk to me, please. FELICITY!" Queen's voice was a begging growl infused with panic. He knew that feeling, the sensation of hope draining as he realized what was being taken from him. He couldn't let it affect him, because he could not walk away, had never been able to walk away - not from her.
He crushed the phone and stripped her of any tracking devices. Then has he had done before he defied his orders for Felicity Smoak. He returned to Central City, found a breach and jumped through it with precious cargo back to his world.
He'd make her whole again, use that to show her the depth of his affections so that she would know that he was worthy of her and of her love and not Queen, and then he would remove the threats to her of his world – Ra's and Zoom – so that they, that she, could be safe. And then they could be together again.
The breach activity they accidentally managed to capture confounded Barry. Oliver crossing over with Felicity made no sense as most activity came in their direction. He insisted that they watch it over and over again while Cisco used the software Felicity had provided them to analyze the video, to prove it false.
When they couldn't he ran to Star City to find an explanation. He got one, but it wasn't one that boded well. Team Arrow was in chaos and Oliver – Oliver – was beside himself. Felicity had been taken.
Diggle had just begun asking for his help, he'd been the first to speak as the others were still adjusting to his appearance, when he grabbed Oliver and raced them back to STAR Labs.
Barry watched his friend fight back the effects of unprepared for speed as Cisco announced, "That can't be a good thing," and Caitlin had breathlessly questioned, "Oliver?"
"Barry," Oliver seethed through gritted teeth, "you have to take me back so I can find Felicity."
"Dude, she's not in Star City," Cisco replied. His normally jovial tone was sedate by Cisco standards, but that did not prevent Oliver from glaring him with frosty blue eyes that promised violence if he was argued with.
"What?"
Cisco hit a few keys and the video they had been watching on a loop began to play again on the large screen in front of him. Upon seeing Felicity Oliver breathed out her name reverently as he leaned over Cisco's shoulder to take a better a look. He hissed when he saw his own face on the man carrying her and then let loose the sound of a wounded animal when both figures disappeared through the breach. "What happened? Where did they go?" he queried his voice low and tense, his face etched with a mixture of fury and helplessness.
Again Cisco answered because apparently he was the only one not having trouble processing what happened. "The other Earth. You, other you, Earth Two – that's what we've been calling it – E2 Oliver Queen took her there."
The why of it hung heavily in the air, as did the how. How had that Oliver managed to get here? If it had been Zoom wouldn't he of tried to kill him? That was after all the mission of every person Zoom had sent through the breach. That E2 Oliver Queen would have his own agenda shouldn't be a shock given the Oliver Barry knew.
But to involve Felicity, to hurt her, that wasn't within the Oliver he knew, but Barry had to remind himself that just because they shared a face didn't mean he knew the Earth Two version of Oliver Queen.
He saw Oliver's hands clench, his knuckles turning white, as he straightened his posture into a fighting stance. "How do we get her back?"
Barry sucked in a pained breath at the question. Of all the unanswerable questions floating through his mind it was the only one that truly matter and it was the one that hurt most not being able to answer. He had no idea if they could or would get Felicity back and even the acknowledgement of that frightened him. And not just because what it meant for Oliver, but what it meant for all of them. Felicity Smoak wasn't just the heart of Team Arrow but the reason he had stuck with his own team. Whenever they seemed to be riding off the rails it was Felicity who corrected their course and showed them who they were as individuals and as a team.
None of them would be who they were and do what they did without her and he was not certain that they could continue on successfully for long without her. There was only one option as far as he was concerned, as any of them would be - they had to get her back. "I'm not sure," Barry finally answered ending the heavy silence that had descended over the room, "but we'll figure it out."
She had never wanted to see the magical hot tub waters of Nanda Parbat again but OJQ as she had come to refer to Oliver's doppelganger in her head gave her little choice and seeing how she was in no condition to fight and had no interest in seeing anyone associated with the League she kept quiet. It helped that her silence seemed to pain the impostor, though admittedly that hurt her heart as well. Oliver in pain, even if OJQ wasn't her Oliver, was something Felicity had trouble not wanting to relieve.
No matter how much she repeated the mantra in her head that he wasn't Oliver, OJQ looked at her with the same love he did and it was hard to hold onto her resolve. Beyond looking like Oliver he sounded like him, moved like him, smelled like him. His arms around her felt like him, like home.
But the lack of tattoos on his ripped and scarred chest as he lowered them into the Lazarus Pit waters was a jolting and physical reminder that no matter much he seemed like Oliver, OJQ wasn't him. And that this place, not just Nanda Parbat, but the entire world might feel familiar it was so clearly different and not hers.
And she didn't want to be here in these treacherous waters, in a world not her own, with a man who was only echo of the one she loved ... then the tingling started. A faint ghost of feeling in her legs and then the heat of waters and OJQ she felt on her back began to impossibly seep into her useless legs.
Felicity was afraid to hope, to believe even for a second that she was regaining sensation in a dead part of herself. She poked her left thigh and felt the pressure of her own touch. It seem to spread out through the muscle and down the entire length of the appendage. Not trusting it she attempted what had recently become impossible and tried to wiggle her toes.
They moved. She made them move! First the left set and then the right, and so giddy at the movement – at the feel of water gliding between her toes – she kicked her legs, splashing the water some and making contact with the flesh beneath her and oh how that felt. The slide of skin against skin had her releasing a breathy moan and the man underneath her reacted.
She was pulled hard against familiar flesh, felt his erection against her backside as chapped lips nestled against the tender spot where neck met shoulder. For a moment Felicity's body relaxed into the welcomed feel of Oliver, but as teeth scraped against her neck and up to her ear she remembered that he wasn't her Oliver and she pushed away from him, embarrassment and anger coloring her face. She fought the urge to unleash her loud voice. This was not the time or place for that.
His eyes had blown wide with lust and he started to reach for her before either her contempt or their surroundings registered. When it did, his fingers barely brushed over her as they curled into fists and he fought through his passion back to the reality at hand.
He signaled for her to be quiet and to follow him. Given the situation she had little choice but to so and Felicity resented that. That emotion mixed with gratitude for the gift he had given her in restoring her ability to walk. But with that came trepidation as she wondered what he would expect in return. What had nearly transpired between them gave her an inkling but there was no way that would ever happen. She loved Oliver and no matter the similarities OJQ was not the man she loved. He wasn't her Oliver Queen and he was the only man she wanted.
They had pulled Curtis in, giving him a crash seminar in no longer secret identities and the breaches into a parallel universe. While Thea and Laurel with Lyla's assistance kept Star City safe, Oliver trained endlessly with Diggle in Central City to prepare himself for what could possibly await them on the other side. When Barry wasn't handling his day job or Flash duties he joined them.
As hours turned into days and days edged into a week Oliver was creeping ever closer to an explosion. He needed to get Felicity back and figuring out safe travel through the breach was starting to matter less. He just needed to be doing. He had to find Felicity, to get her back, and hold her in his arms again. Had to.
Cisco and Curtis hooting in success had to be one of the sweetest sounds he ever heard because it took him one step closer to being able to go after Felicity.
They had just been finalizing their plan, his own anxiousness to move forward making the preparations seem tedious, when an alarm sounded. "Breach activity," Cisco announced, one of his early failures with Curtis, had led to the near instant notification system and a live feed of where the active breach was located appeared on screen.
They watched as his counterpart and Felicity stepped back through into their world. "Barry," he barked, but his friend was already speeding away - to her - before he finished saying his name.
Oliver watched as the man with his face spoke to Felicity, his hands cupping her face. She shook her head, causing the man to frown before he claimed her lips with his own. His entire body tensed at the sight and did not relax when Barry swooped in and extradited her from his doppelganger's grasp. There was a quick exchange between them and then the trespasser hopped back through the breach. As he disappeared so did Felicity and Barry.
They reappeared seconds later inside of STAR Labs and that is when it finally hit him. Felicity was standing on her own, rushing forward of her own volition to throw her arms around him. What his mind could not accept his body did and his arms banded tightly around her, crushing her to him, leaving no space between them.
"Felicity," he asked tentatively.
"It's me," she assured him, peppering his face with kisses. "I didn't think I get to see you, the real you, again."
"I don't..." Oliver could not finish his thought so he tucked his head into her neck and breathed her in.
"I died—" he jerked at that and brought his face up to meet hers, their eyes meeting and holding as she clarified, "I mean she died. He wants, well it doesn't matter because I won't replace her once he makes it safe over there." His hands clenched painfully tight over her hips at those words.
Like hell, he thought. No one, not even some version of himself, was ever taking Felicity from him again.
"Never going to happen," Diggle voiced his vow as he squeezed Felicity shoulder. Though he hated the loss of her touch he didn't begrudge the arm she wrapped around John to hug him in greeting. They stood there for a full minute, the three of them connected, before the bubbling of questions could no longer be contained.
They sat for hours, Felicity on his lap, as she told them everything that happened, everything OJQ told her, and everything she saw with her own eyes on Earth Two. When they were done he spent the night worshiping her, showing her just how much she was missed and confessing his last secrets so that nothing could ever possibly part them again.
The next morning as the combined genius of Team Arrow and Team Flash went to work on closing the breaches to ensure that neither Zoom nor OJQ could inflict anymore damage on their world, Oliver trained with a renewed determination. Readying to face himself for the most precious thing on any world, because he could not fault this other him, if he was in same predicament he would very likely do the same thing. Living without Felicity was not an option and he would fight whoever he had to ensure it was not a fate that would befall him.