Disclaimer: Nope, don't own digimon, or the characters. Oh well, maybe when I'm older.
Black Clouds: Part one- Confession
Tai's POV
The last few rays of sunshine were gone. Shut away cruelly by a big black storm clouds. The few squirrels and birds that were still running around, raced back to the green leafed trees to hide. The rain started, at first it was just a slight drizzle, hardly even worth noticing. This quickly became worse, as the it didn't just rain, it poured. Huge torrents of rain came shooting out of the heavens, drenching everything they touched. Lightening danced across the sky and thunder roared out in it's defiance. What had turned out to be a beautiful day, was now a mass of water, light and noise.
The rain hit fiercely against my pink umbrella, trying to break through at me. Yes, a pink umbrella. Normally I would never be caught dead with anything so girlish, but today seemed like a good day to forget about that, I was just glad that most of those cold wet drops could not reach me. I had spent the day at the Takenuchi's apartement, trying to get help with my homework from Sora. She was the one who lent me the umbrella. I had come over to her house, expecting to study, but she kept breaking off of the books to do stuff for me. Like bake me cookies, put on my favorite movies, and other time consuming things like that.
I'm not stupid. I know what she wants, and she's waiting for me to make the first move. The problem is, I don't know what I want. I should be interested in her, I mean aren't all boys my age interested in any girl that went after them? I don't know. Maybe I just want to stay being her friend. And we are great friends, we are always hanging around together, playing soccer, or just talking. It's great. Why would I want that to change? ... Or maybe there is just something wrong with me.
A large clap of thunder startled me out of my deep thoughts. I peered through the downpour which was limiting my vision. It didn't look like it was going to let up any time soon. I sighed and tightened my thin jacket around me. I still had about a fifteen minute walk through all of this. My feet were already sloshing from stepping into so many puddles.
About three quarters of the way through the park, I saw someone sitting on a bench. This person was just sitting there in this weather with no umbrella or even a jacket! As I got closer I could see it was a boy. He had his head down in his hands, and a mop of golden blonde hair was plastered to his skull. Feeling a bit sympathetic, I decided to go see what was wrong with him. You know, be a good samaritan and all that. So I sat down on the bench beside him and looked closer. Now I recognized that hair, what was he doing out here?
"Matt? What's wrong?" I put a hand gently on his shoulder.
I guess I startled him because he jumped up fast. His face was pale, almost white and he stared at me with wide eyes. Matt tried to stutter something, but ended up just shrugging and staring at his shoes, "Nothing." Was all he told me.
"Nothing huh. Then why are you here? In case you haven't noticed, there is a huge storm happening at the moment."
He glared up at me and snapped "Why would you care?"
I calmly stared back at him and answered in a calm voice, trying to keep down my growing anger. Matt deserved to be smacked right now, I was only trying to help him. "Of course I would care. I am your friend you know."
A fork of lightening brightened the sky, and was followed by a boom of thunder. Matt jumped about a mile high, "Shit!" He turned and looked up frantically, "Storm!"
I smacked a hand to my forehead, why do I even bother? "I already told you that, Matt. What, you just noticed? This has been going on for quite awhile now."
He came back over to me and sat on the bench again. This time he was shivering a bit. I'm not surprised, he is pretty wet and it's not very warm out right now. I held the umbrella over the both of us, and for a bit there was just silence. Neither one of us said anything, we just watched the rain fall and the lightening flash. I looked over at Matt after a few minutes, he was just staring out with a sad look in his eyes. There was diffently something wrong, but I decided I'd wait for him to bring it up. I didn't want to scare him again.
Yamato Ishida. I had known him for years, since we were about eleven. I met him at a summer camp that we went to, and from there we got to know each other even better, even came to rely on one another. We had to to survive. You see, it was that year that all the strange stuff had happened. Imagine this, it is the hottest part of the year in the middle of july, you're running around having a blast by the lake, when suddenly a few white flakes fall out of the sky and land on your nose. That's right, it snowed. And that wasn't even the strangest thing to happen. Seven of us were swept away to a whole new world filled with strange monsters. Izzy found out later that we were in some type of computery world. But it was real. We- Matt, Sora, Mimi, Joe, Izzy, TK and me- were all digidestined. We were brought there to save the digital world. We even each met a new monster friend. Mine was Koromon, at first. He looked like a pinkish head with two antennae sticking off. Later I got him to digivolve into Agumon, who was way cool. He looked like a tiny orange dinosaur. It was pretty neat. During our adventures we all learned things about ourselves, and came to rely on each other more and more. I also got to learn about Matt even better. He had always had a cold, uncaring outer shell that he showed everyone, but he also had a caring, sensitive side to him. This especially came out towards his little brother TK. After the digiworld, we grew a little farther apart, but not too much. We were still friends, and I always felt comfortable around him. I could tell him stuff and trust him not to blab it to the first person he saw.
It was then that I noticed that Matt was staring back at me, his deep blue eyes boring into mine. I must have looked like an idiot. Blinking, I quickly looked away and saw that the rain was finally starting to slow down. A bit of blue sky was trying to break free of the clouds.
"Tai?" I looked back over at the wet boy. He was still staring at me intently. It was sorta freaking me out, but I smiled anyway, "Yeah?"
"Well, uh," He looked away from me finally before going on, "Have...Have you ever felt that you were in love with someone, but...but you didn't think that... person would or could love you back? I...I mean that it was just, like, wrong to love the other person but you just couldn't help it?" He was studying a thread on his pants hard.
What was I to say? Of course the first thing that pops into my head, "You love someone? Who? Do I know her?" Great, I just answered him with a bunch of my own questions.
Matt looked up at me with a strange expression on his face. He shook his head a bit then stood up, "I... should be getting home now. Thanks for talking with me. I'll see you in school tomorrow." Then he turned around slowly and started away.
"Matt? Did I say something wrong?" I called after him. I didn't mean to make him mad.
"No. See ya Tai" He then started running. I watched him until he was out of sight, and sighed. Maybe he'd tell me later. I looked up and saw that the rain had actually stopped. The sun was peeking out from behind a large cloud, and a small blue bird flew overhead. Maybe it was going to turn out to be a nice day after all.
*>>>>>*
School. Just the sound of that word wants to make you throw up everything you had. School was just a nice way of saying prison. They lock you in classrooms all day for five days a week, teaching a bunch of crap that you're going to forget by the next year anyway. Or in my case, the next day. Stuck in a stuffy, hot class, with only a one hour lunch break is not fun at all. Especially since it is so boring. The teacher goes on and on in that hypnotic voice until you just can't keep your eyelids open. Then you get yelled at for falling asleep. At least I do.
"Kamiya Taichi, what is the capital of America?"
Someone threw an eraser at my head, and I came back to reality to find everyone staring at me, "x equals 25!" I yelled out, thinking I was still in math class. Oops, wrong answer. Everyone was laughing at me, I was used to it. I just sat there grinning stupidly.
"Thank you, Taichi, for the answer to last weeks problem in Math. Now for this one. Think hard or you'll end up staying with me after school." He told me in that same drone he uses for lectures.
Shoot, I can't stay after school, I had a huge soccer game. Come on Kamiya think hard. Capital of America, didn't Mimi live there? She told me she did, now where was that? Curse my short-term memory, "Uh, just a sec, I know it...I really do."
Just then Matt, who was in this class with me, raised his hand, "Sensei, can I please go to the washroom? It's an emergency!" He hopped up and down in his seat as if to prove his point.
"Hurry up then, Ishida, I want you back in three minutes." I don't think our teachers ever trust Matt, he was always getting into a bit of trouble with them. Matt had to pass right by my desk on his way out, and as he did a piece of paper slipped out of his hand onto my lap. Quickly, while the teacher was distracted, I opened the paper up and read the few words, Washington, You baka.> Oh, right, now I remembered.
"Well Kamiya? Are you spending some time with me after school?" Sensei asked.
"No way man. The answer is WASHINGTON!" I whooped. I laughed at the look on his face, he really hadn't expected me to get the right answer. And I probably wouldn't have either if it wasn't for Matt. I might even forgive him for calling me a baka.
"You are correct. Very good Taichi. Well then, I guess you really do listen ...." He went back to lecturing us on the American sights and history and boring stuff like that. After a few more minutes, the bell rang. I shoved my books into my bag and raced out of the classroom like mad. Time to go to soccer!
After grabbing my needed books for homework out of my locker, I slammed it shut and headed for the changing rooms where I would meet with the rest of my team. On my way there I saw Matt at his locker as he struggled with a pile of books and papers. I went over to him and tapped him on the shoulder. Matt whipped around, and glared at me, "What?"
"Hey Matt. Thanks for that answer. I would have been so screwed if I couldn't make this game." I grinned cheerfully at him. It looked like he still was unhappy.
"Whatever," His usual reply. Matt looked down at the floor, was he blushing? I shook my head and wiped that thought out of my mind. Yeah right, Matt would never blush, just my imagination.
"Well, thanks anyway. Look, I'll talk to you later okay? I can't be late for the game." Then a thought hit my mind, "Hey, uh, Matt? You coming to watch?"
He looked up at me, almost suspiciously, "Watch what?"
"The soccer game, duh. What else."
"Oh, I guess. You don't mind?" Mind? Why would I mind? Matt was acting very strange, especially after last night.
"Course not! Anyway got to run," I said as I looked up at the clock, I had two minutes left to get to the changing rooms, "See ya at the game." I waved over my shoulder and took off.
*>>>>>*
"Wow Taichi, awsome game."
"You were so great Tai."
"You must be the best player ever, Tai."
"Taichi!, I love you!"
I made my way through the pack of gushing girls. I didn't so much mind the attention, it just kind of gets annoying after awhile. I waved at a few of them, and one practically fainted. I finally made it to the doors of the locker rooms, ready for a cold shower. At the doorway, I spotted Matt talking with Sora. I ran over to them.
"Hi Sora, Hi Matt." I greeted them as I stood there panting a bit, still tired out from that rough game.
Sora spoke first, "Hi Tai, wow you were awesome out there. Scoring the winning goal and everything!" I grinned at her as she gave me a big hug. Looking over her shoulder I stopped grinning. Matt was staring at Sora with a angry and hurt look in his eyes. His fists were clenched at his sides as he tried to lean casually on the door frame. What was wrong with him?
Sora finally let go of me and I walked over to Matt, "Hi man, what's up?"
"The sky"
"ha...ha. Lame. So, uh, did you two have a fight or something?" I looked over at Sora then back at Matt.
They both stared at me like I just said something crazy. "Fight? Where'd you get that idea?" Sora asked me.
"Oh, uh, nevermind." I mumbled, confused. Why had Matt looked at Sora like that if they weren't angry at each other? "I need a shower, so I'll meet you guys in the parking lot in fifteen minutes alright?"
They agreed and I went into the changing rooms to get out of my sweaty soccer strip. All my soccer buddies were there. Almost all of them were patting me on the back and congragulating me. I was their hero. Hehe, and I loved getting attention. There were a few guys who were just glaring at me. It was Seb and his little gang. Seb hated it when I got recognition and he was just another one on my team. He had three others with him, Daren, Rem and Jerry. They all stuck with him, and all hated me with every thing they had. But I always just ignored them. They've only threatened me so far. They were so childish.
I finished up, and put on some clean clothes then hurried out to the front parking lot. I looked around until I spotted my dad's car. At the car, Sora, Matt, my Dad and my little sister, Kari were all having a conversation. Well, Matt was just kind of nodding along, not really looking interested. When he saw me coming, I could swear I saw him brighten up for a moment before going back into the blank state of his.
"Tai! I saw you get that goal at the end. It was super!" Kari ran over to me and gave me a big hug. I picked her up, even though that was getting harder to do since she's been growing, and went over to the group.
"Great game son. Hop in the car. I'll drive Sora and Matt home also." My father patted my shoulder. I got into the back seat, and Matt and Sora followed. Kari sat up front with our dad. Matt had ended up sitting next to me, and for most of the drive, he would barely talk with me, much less look at me. This was getting weird. I decided to do something about it. Maybe I had done something wrong with Matt, and didn't even notice. Obviously he was mad at me for something. So after Sora was dropped off at her house I told my dad to let me and Matt out at the park. He did so with out question, just told me to be back home by dinner time.
When we were out of the car, Matt turned to me questioningly, "Why are we here? I wanted to go home. This is not where I live."
"No kidding. You think?" I sighed and scratched me head, "Come on, let's walk." I started down the path, and Matt followed after a bit of hesitation. We walked in silence for a little while, I could tell that Matt was a bit confused about something.
Finally I pointed to some flat rocks by the river and we made our way over to them. I sat down comfortably and motioned for Matt to do the same. He did and we sat there facing each other for a while.
"Matt, I'm sorry." I didn't know what else to say.
"For what?" Now he did look confused.
"I don't know. For whatever I did, I guess. You must be upset with me for some reason." I watched him carefully. Matt broke the stare, and looked away to the river that was nearby.
He finally answered me in a quiet voice, "I'm not mad at you. Why do you think that?"
I gave him a funny look, "Well you have been acting kind of distant around me. And being really strange." Then it hit me, "that's it! Is it Sora you like? I saw you glaring at her when she was hugging me. Is that who you were talking about yesterday?"
"What? Sora? No!" Matt stared at me in shock, "How could you even say such a thing? She's barely my friend."
"Oh, sorry." I shook my head, "I thought...well, anyway, What is it then, if it's not that?"
Matt picked up a small twig and started scratching in the dirt with it. He didn't look like he wanted to answer me. I sighed and grabbed Matt's wrist. He tried to jerk away, looking at me in a weird, shocked sort of way.
"Let go of me Tai!" He tried to loosen my grip but I just snatched up his other wrist in my right hand.
"Listen Matt, something is going on with you, and I'm going to find out what's wrong. I'm your friend, you know that, and you can tell me anything. That's what best friends are for. Just spit it out already." That got him.
He stopped his struggling and gazed sadly into my eyes, "Tai, I really want to tell you. I haven't because you're my friend. And I don't want to lose your friendship. Please, just stop."
"What the hell are you talking about? I'm not going to stop until you tell me! I promise, I won't give up our friendship, but please, I need to know."
"Fine, I'll tell you then," Matt looked at me, as he tried to collect himself. I knew something big was coming, but I hadn't realized how big until he blurted it out, "I...I'm... gay." Well that wasn't so bad, but there was more coming, "And... I... I think... I'm in love... with, uh, you." He said quickly, in a barely audible whisper.
I don't think that it went all the way through my brain at first. All I could do was stare at him. I couldn't react, what did he say? He...He loved Me? But that was impossible, that... that was horrible. Those last words kept ringing in my ears, how? How could my best friend say that? Yes, I know I'm overreacting, but it's kind of hard not to. I've known Matt a long time, and maybe I've suspected this, but I never expected him to actually say that. In a way it's almost... almost nice to hear him say that... No! I'm not like that, not ever. My dad has told me a million times how bad it is for same sexes to love each other like that. But... NO!
I think Matt must have been getting worried about me, I hadn't spoken in over ten minutes now. I was in deep shock, and in even deeper denial. "T..Tai? Are you okay?"
"Okay? Okay? My best friend just told me he loved me! Why shouldn't I be okay?" I stood up quickly, freaking out and backing away from Matt. I know I shouldn't have, but I just couldn't handle this at the moment, I needed to think, to figure things out first, "I...I have to go ho...home now. Uh, dinner time, you know." And I turned my back to him and ran, away from the one person who desperately needed me right then.
I heard him calling my name, but I didn't turn around. I just ran with all of my great soccer speed. I had to get home, think this over, or maybe just put it out of my mind. How could Matt do this to me? Was he crazy? I know I should have stayed, and if I had been in my right state of mind I wouldn't have just left Matt alone, especially after my reaction. If I had known, I would have stuck with him no matter what. That just goes to show what a great friend I am, huh.
It was early the next morning that I got the phone call.