Disclaimer: Don't own
"Fuck no. If things go wrong, and God Lavi they will because you suck that way, the hell would I call you? You're the half-blind rabbit now, and after this you'll be... What? The blind blind rabbit?"
"Hot one, if your fuck-awful premonition came true, you could just call me the blind rabbit. Or Lavi, just plain ol' Lavi would be lover-ly. Seriously"
"Tch"
Lavi smiled crookedly, straightening his eyepatch.
"It's nice of you t'worry, Yuu, but it's my eye, even if there's only one left, and like the wolf said, 's for the better to see you with"
Kanda scowled and started flicking his pen in the air, a sign of great agitation and impending doom. Lavi ignored it.
"I'm not going to waste my time on a cripple"
Which was a lie, of course, because Lavi could only see in one eye and that made him at least slightly disabled as is.
"Then I'm going t'have to do it anyways and hope the first person I see when I open my eye'll be Yuu"
Kanda was very little short of hissing, lip curved up in a teeth-baring snarl. "I'm not going to stay at a fucking hospital of all places. God forbid anyone thinking I actually agree with such flagrant money wasting"
Lavi pouted, and moved to lean against the table Kanda sat at. He bent over the Japanese boy, and stayed that way.
"We tried everything else for my shitty eyesight, Yuu-chan. Glasses are pointless, and that thing with the monocle... I'm still traumatised. Wearing a contact lens means I can see and make out with you no problem, yeah, but Yuu," Lavi head-butted Kanda playfully and just smiled when his shoulder was punched (though not hard enough to dislodge him). "The problem is it's fucking annoying having t'drag m'self from bed and Yuu to wash and keep the little bit of plastic in my eye, and when I wake up on days y'feel gracious enough t'sleep in the same bed with me, but I can't see you clearly..."
Lavi laughed.
"Not a lot of fun. Plus since my flaming gay boyfriend likes to get in touch with his inner whale and swim in the ocean insanely often, I wanna make sure I can see you. In case y'drown or somethin', honey cakes."
Predictably, Kanda was pissed off at the insinuation that he would need saving to begin with.
"Fuck stupid reasoning, rabbit"
"Says the guy that schedules appointments with my ophthamologist six months in advance"
Kanda leaned forward and brutally pecked Lavi's eye. The red head suspected that he would have gone blind anyway if he hadn't blinked in time (Kanda didn't do light kisses. It was either toe-curling tongue or a good impression of an irate hen.
"The surgery's expensive and you could go blind. Idiot"
"It's not really so dangerous, you just gotta have faith. Don't'cha like the idea of me bein' able to see Yuu perfectly any time of day?"
"It's a pointless risk"
"Ah, but Yuu, you're the point!"
"You don't let some random stranger poke your eye with flashing lights for the sake of someone else"
"I'm half-blind, love's blind, between them Yuu, y'should feel grateful I can even read your name!"
"I'm not going to waste anymore of my time trying to talk sense into you; obviously a stone wall has a better chance of making a smarter conclusion" Kanda frowned at Lavi as if he had just been gravely offended.
Which, if Lavi had it correctly, meant that Yuu still didn't want him to do it but didn't think it was his business to bitch over.
Usually Lavi liked everything about him to be Kanda's business, but the odd show of restraint from the Japanese was adorable.
"We should go to Greece after my eye gets fixed... Y'can live in the Mediterranean, you and your salt water, you'll have a ball, and I'll have a ball seein' Yuu in swimming trunks, God yes"
"You're a fucking fortunate rabbit that I still haven't killed you after all this time"
Lavi, well, Lavi was Lord and Master of barely-there feathery kisses, and Kanda was treated to a show of his abilities.
"'s 'cos y'love me so much you hurt, Yuu"
"Fuck you"
A response that Lavi had stopped taking as a rejection the second time Kanda had tried to brush him off with it.
"I'll teach you how to whisper sweet nothings in Greek, Yuu"
Kanda snorted and pushed Lavi off his table.
"Like you taught me to do in Russian. Most useless skill ever, rabbit"
"I liked listening"
"Not the point. One blabber-mouthed idiot in a bed is enough. Hopefully next time you'll be too busy having the awesome sight that is me naked burned into your retina to talk much"
Lavi grinned and sneakily tried to kick Kanda's chair out from under him.
Kanda stood and pushed the chair onto Lavi instead, and if this wasn't love, being laid out flat on the ground, heaviness and warmth on his chest, dark dark eyes gleaming with something as Kanda smirked victoriously, then nothing was.
Lavi groaned, despairing of the way he was steadily losing common sense and I.Q points to intense sappiness.
"Knew you'd come around, Yuu"
Kanda stepped on the chair, enough to be felt but nowhere near heavily enough to hurt.
"Only because I fucking rhymes-with-shove you, idiot"
Which was so much better than Kanda just lovin-... rhymes-with-shoving to fuck him, Lavi thought he would cry.
Kanda speak pretty one day.
Kanda speak pretty one day; Lavi'll be there with a twinkling eye to see him do it.
A/N: In case it wasn't clear (though the lovely Vi says it is), Lavi wants eye surgery to fix his vision and Kanda's against it (because it's expensive? Or he's just a big wimp? Nobody knows, mmhmm). And Kanda is too incompetent to actually say the word love, thus the whole issue with the rhyming and shoving XD For Sure Lavi Kan-a-Da fest/week/day (excuse the heinous punning). Please r&r, yeah?