Frank rolled over with a groan, snatching his ringing phone off of the nightstand. He snapped it open, using one hand to bring it up to his ear and the other hand to smooth a hand through his beard. "Hello?"
"Frank! Thank goodness!"
"Jesus, Laurel, do you even know what time it is?"
She was already apologizing, before he'd even finished his sentence. "I know, Frank. I'm sorry... I just didn't know who else to call."
Frank couldn't keep the smirk off of his face. "Well, maybe try calling that boyfriend of yours, hm?"
There was a pause at her end of the line. He couldn't resist. "Forget all about him, princess?" he teased. "You must be hung up on me good."
"No," she protested. "No, of course I didn't forget... Kan. God, Frank! I just need your help. You, specifically. Kan can't really help me with this."
That piqued his interest. He tried to ignore the grip that closed in on his chest. "You in trouble, Laurel? Where are you?"
She was right where she said she would be, and when his car pulled up next to her the relief on her face was visible, even in the dark and damp. Frank leaned across, opening the door for her, and she slid inside, shivering.
"You ok?" he asked, passing his jacket over to her.
"Yeah," Laurel sighed, wrapping herself in it. It was warm, and smelled of Frank's cologne. "I just... feel so dumb."
He looked her over as best as he could in the dim car. She looked a little shaken, and definitely chilly, but she'd survive. "Well, you could be dead. Think of how dumb you'd feel then."
She pursed her lips into a thin, tight line, but didn't argue. She couldn't believe she'd even gotten herself into this mess.
Laurel never went out. Between work and school and homework, she barely felt like she had time to sleep, let alone go out and socialize. But it had been a special occasion- a couple of classmates going out, celebrating the end of their exams. And they had reached out to her, included her. Invited her to tag along.
Laurel had almost forgot what it was like to have friends- nice, normal friends. Friends who didn't murder.
So she'd said yes.
She should have known the night would have ended terrible. She simply should have known, because that is her life.
She should have known to drive her own car. She should have known that her classmate- the friendly guy with the sharp glasses and the perfect hair- was going to get significantly more friendly after a couple drinks. She should have known that he was just not going to gracefully take 'no' for an answer, once he had her cornered away and alone after the rest of the group had migrated off to who knows where. Had this even been the plan all along? She should have known.
She had tried everything, letting him down nicely- 'No, I can't go back to your place... I have a boyfriend, I still have homework, I have to work in the morning.' When those hadn't deterred him, she'd been more firm- 'I don't even know you. I have a boyfriend. I am just not attracted to you.'
By that point, Laurel had simply snuck off and hid in the bathroom, praying for a way out that wasn't too messy. When she reemerged to discover that he had left without her, his wounded pride his only company for the ride home, she wasn't even surprised and was even a little relieved.
She was surprised, however, when she discovered that her purse had magically disappeared with him.
Could this night have been more of a disaster?
Without her purse, she had no phone, no wallet. The bar by that time was closing. After another twenty minutes of pleading with the bartender, she had borrowed his phone and dialed the first phone number that came to mind.
She sighed, leaning her forehead against the cool window. She watched the houses and building zip by in the dark. As Frank navigated the car through the mostly empty streets, Laurel remained silent- even when she realized that his destination was not her apartment, but his. At least she was with Frank. At least now she knew she was safe.
She tried to ignore the knot growing in her stomach. She snuck a look at him through the corner of her eye, wondering what he must think of her.
Once they were in front of his building, Frank looked over at her. "Now, no arguing, before you even start. It's four in the morning. Your house is all the way across town and I don't feel like driving that far. You're lucky I even came and picked your ass up. So you're gonna stay here, and I'll get you home after we both get some sleep."
"But-"
"I'm not going to try anything," he promised for the hundredth time to her, shifting the car into park. "You get the couch."
They made their way inside, falling into silence once more. Tossing his keys on the table, he turned to her.
"So, you want to talk about it?"
Laurel groaned. "Can I wash off?" She pointed to the bathroom.
Frank nodded, taking off towards linen closet. As he grabbed some spare blankets, he could hear the sounds of her taking off her clothes, dropping them on the floor. The shower started.
"It was just this stupid guy," she called out to him, pulling the shower curtain back. She tested the water, climbing in. "I went out with some classmates and ended up getting stuck with this guy who just wouldn't stop trying to get me to go home with him. When he finally got the picture, he just stranded me there." She peered around the curtain.
Frank was leaning in the bathroom doorway, watching her. "Well," he drew out. "Obviously, I'm wondering where this amazing boyfriend of yours was tonight."
Laurel was silent for a moment. She ducked back under the stream of water, and began lathering her hair with Frank's shampoo. It smelled like cedar.
"I was just so sick of Kan," she finally said, quietly, rinsing herself off. "Sick of him, and you, and Annalise, and all of us, and what we did... I just wanted to feel normal again. I just wanted to be normal for one night. With normal people. So I told Kan I was working late, and I went out."
The shower clicked off, and she stuck her hand out of the curtain, gesturing. He obligingly handed her a towel.
"Everyone is fucked up, Laurel," he said. "There's no such thing as 'normal' people, princess."
Stepping out of the shower, Laurel shrugged.
"What the fuck is that? A shrug?" Frank crossed his arms. She knew he was irritated at her- she was surprised it had taken him this long to actually show it. "Laurel, tonight could have ended badly for you. I know I don't have to tell you what people are capable of- even seemingly 'normal' ones."
Laurel rubbed her temples, a headache brewing. "Frank, can you just spare me the lecture-"
He barked out a laugh. "Spare you? How about you spare me the phone call in the middle of the night to come save your ass? You've yet to tell me why exactly any of this that's happened to you tonight is my problem at all."
"I just didn't know who else to call-"
"Call your precious Kan!"
They were standing mere inches apart, cramped in the small, steam-filled bathroom. Laurel was wrapped in her towel, dripping onto the floor. Tears were stinging at her eyes, threatening to fall. Frank's arms had unfolded themselves; he was gesticulating as his voice rose, and he had grabbed her by the shoulder. He shook her slightly. "Why is it my job to save you when you have a boyfriend? One that you love to keep reminding me of?"
"If you didn't want to help me, you could have just said so."
He took a step back, pulling at his beard. "Cut the bullshit, Laurel. You called me because you knew I would come, and you would still be able to save face with your perfect boyfriend."
They had made their way out into the living room without Laurel even noticing. She swallowed hard. He was right- of course he was- but she hated hearing the words out loud, having to face her terrible selfishness head on. "Frank, please-"
Frank sank down onto the couch with a sigh. "I just... I can't do this. I can't be that guy anymore, Laurel. You don't get to keep me around so that I can be the one who gets to do your dirty work and keep your secrets and clean up all of your messes. That's not how this works. I don't work for you."
"I don't want you to work for me!" Laurel cried. A fat tear rolled down her cheek and she wiped it away angrily with the heel of her hand. "I just... I thought you were my friend."
The words fell flat between them, sounding dumb even to her.
"'Friend'." Frank looked at her hard for a long moment. Finally, he shook his head. "Well, I don't know if I can just be your friend, Laurel. I think you know that. Sometimes it's just not in the cards."
Laurel was crying in earnest now, confused at herself. Her heart felt like it was breaking, and she couldn't exactly explain why. What was it about this man that just made her not even able to think straight? She knew that she was supposed to end up with a guy like Kan. Kan was good, Kan was safe. Frank was terrible- a truly bad man. She didn't even know how many awful things he'd done in his life, how many crimes he's committed. But every time Laurel was in Frank's presence, it was always harder and harder to remember that.
She tried so hard to do the right thing, to be the person she knew she should be, trying to keep him at a distance... but the idea of Frank not being in her life at all, however, was unbearable to her. She felt unbelievably foolish, and selfish.
"I just..." she shuddered, her voice thick. "I just don't know what to do anymore. About anything. My whole life is so out of control, and I just don't know anything."
Frank brought a hand up to her face. She didn't fight it, for once, and turned her face into his palm, seeking comfort. Feeling bolder, his other hand came up to push the hair that had fallen forward out of her face. Even his gentle, chaste touch- him simply holding her face as if she were made of the most delicate porcelain- was enough to make her whole body hum.
"Listen," he said softly. "I didn't mean to make you cry. I get it. I know why you think you should be with him. But you're not right for him."
"What, you're going to tell me I'm too good for him? That I deserve better?" Laurel shook her head. "Because I'm not. I'm... bad. I'm just a bad person, Frank."
"No, that's not what I'm saying," Frank said pointedly. "Would you just listen to me? For once?" He pulled her head back slightly so that she could look him in the eye. "I just know that he doesn't know you like I do, or understand you." He leaned closer. "He doesn't kiss you like I do, and I know he can't fuck you like I do. What we have..." he trailed off.
He didn't need to finish. Laurel closed her eyes. Their faces were so close, she was sure he could feel the heat of the blush that was surely creeping up her neck. She knew he was right. Of course he was right.
Just do it, she willed him silently with her mind. Don't make me feel bad any more, don't make me feel anything or think anything anymore. Just do it, kiss me, do it...
She felt his fingers first, along the top of her towel, dancing across her collarbone. And then his hand was splayed over her neck, and he was pulling her closer, tilting her head. He must have heard her internal plea- his mouth found her jaw and he pressed a kiss there. "Laurel..." he murmured against her, quiet enough that she thought she almost imagined it. "Please..."
His words broke her. She wound her arms around him, finding his lips with her own. It was a hungry, needy kiss, punctuated by her nails digging into his back. Instead of feeling pain at her grip, he relished in it. It was real.
Her kiss, her consent- 'yes, I want you', 'yes, I need this too'- was enough to drive Frank crazy, but he needed more. He pulled her towel open and apart, letting it fall away as his hands roamed across her naked skin. Maybe if he could just cover every square inch, every trace of Kan would be gone. If Frank could erase Kan and just make Laurel forget him, maybe that guilt wouldn't come creeping back over her this time, making her change her mind about him.
Frank felt stupid and angry. Laurel was playing him, again, he knew it. And he knew how this would end. It would be the same way it always was: she would apologize, say it was a mistake again. He would just let her go- again- feeling pissed and helpless until the next time she came crawling back, and he wouldn't be able to say no. Again.
But all of that... that would happen tomorrow. Tonight, he couldn't stop even if he wanted to. He couldn't refuse Laurel when she was finally here in his arms and clinging to him so desperately.
Her kisses seared his mouth, his skin. He felt like he was on fire. He loved it.
Frank had said the words- 'I can't be that guy anymore'- but he knew just how big of a lie it had been. But what could he do? Frank couldn't remember a woman ever driving him so crazy... he only knew that he would do anything for Laurel, she only had to ask- if only just for the chance of her saying the words she was saying now.
"Frank," she was begging, "Frank, please, I need you..."
Frank scooped her up into his arms, carrying her to his bedroom. Laying her out on the bed, he took in the sight of her, naked and reaching for him. He kept out of her arms, though, kneeling at the foot of the bed. He smoothed a hand up her thigh, his mouth following directly behind.
Laurel moaned above him; he felt her fingers gripping his hair, tighter as he got closer to his goal. He brushed a finger against her wetness, leaning in to taste her.
The first time Frank had used his mouth on Laurel, all those months ago, she had been shy. He had found it absolutely charming, and was more then happy to be the one to show her that sex wasn't all selfish bumbling from college-aged boys. He'd taken his time then, just as he was taking his time now, exploring every inch of her until she was writhing beneath his hands, his mouth.
He moved his hand from her hip where he had been holding her down onto the bed and his fingers joined his tongue, pushing inside of her.
'He can't fuck you like I do...' Frank's voice echoed inside of her head. 'You're not right for him...'
Laurel pulled him up, her lips crashing onto his. She moaned into his mouth, arching against him while his strong hand continued to coax her to climax.
"Frank," she whimpered, her shaking hands holding him against her. "Frank-"
"Give this to me," he demanded, his voice like silk in her ear. "Let me make you come."
The soft sounds she made as she fell apart into his hand were going to be the death of him. He didn't think that sounded like such a bad way to go.
The morning sunlight fell through the bedroom curtain, spilling across Frank's naked back. He was curled up, facing away from her. Laurel had been awake forever, it seemed, staring at his back, memorizing each mark her nails has left on him just hours before. She had witness the sunbeam's start as a tiny sliver when the sun came up, and watched it grow into the wide beam now making him glow.
He was truly beautiful. Terrible, and beautiful.
Nobody understood her like Frank did, he was right about that. So, what kind of person did that make her?
A murderer. A liar. Desperate, and broken.
Terrible.
Hell, maybe they deserved each other.
She reached out with one finger, touching his shoulder. He began to stir, and she snatched her hand back as if she had been burned.
"I'm sorry," she cleared her throat. "I didn't mean to wake you."
He rolled over with a sleepy groan, pushing her hair from her face. "Hey there, princess." With a grin, he pulled her closer.
Laurel froze. His warm kiss died on her lips. She was already apologizing, again, before his mouth had even left hers.
"Laurel..." he said, the warmth all but gone from his voice. Here it was, right on schedule. Even though he had been expecting it, he still felt the anger begin to churn inside of him. He wanted to smash something- preferably Kan's face. "Don't."
"Frank, I'm sorry-"
"Stop fucking apologizing to me." He swung his legs over the opposite side of the bed. He rubbed his face, tired. "If you're gonna go, you're gonna go. I told you last night- I get it."
"How can you get it? I don't think I even understand what this is sometimes."
Frank just shook his head. What could he even say?
"I just... I can't be this way," she attempted, staring down at her hands. She wrung them, trying to make sense of her jumbled thoughts. "I'm sorry that I keep dragging you into my shitty problems. And I don't want to hurt you." She took a deep breath. "I do care about you. But I just... can't be with you, Frank."
Laurel looked up at him, at his back, for a response. He offered nothing. Frank was as still as a statue- she could barely make out the rise and fall of his shoulders as he took each breath. He was shutting down, shutting her out. She could hardly blame him. But still, she tried to continue.
"If I'm with you, then that means... I'll have to know things. Things about you. And to be with you, to accept those things... I just don't know if I want to be that person. It... scares me."
There. The truth. Finally, out in the open, hanging heavy between them.
Frank just sighed. Just because he knew it was true didn't mean that he had to enjoy it. "Let's just get you home, ok?"
