Brian and Vinny: Twisted Tuesday
by LDEJRuff
Chapter 1 - The Wish
Our story begins at the Griffin household at night. Peter had just gotten home from the Drunken Clam with Glenn Quagmire and Joe Swanson. Lois had just put Stewie to bed. Meg and Chris have already done their homework for the day, and have already gone to bed. As for Brian and Vinny, they were video chatting with the former's cousin, Jasper, and New Brian.
"Hey, Jasper," Brian greeted. "Hey, New Brian. I see you're wearing the collar I gave you for Christmas."
The gray Border Collie was, indeed, wearing a collar, which looked like the one Vinny wore, except his was green instead of black.
"Thanks, Brian," he replied. "How'd you guess that green was my favorite color?"
"Just luck, I guess," Brian shrugged.
"Anyway," Vinny began, "it's good to meet the both of you. I didn't know that Brian had a cousin until tonight."
"Well, it's good to meet you, too, Vinny," replied Jasper. "I just wish it was in person."
"Me, too," Vinny hoped. "But I guess online video chat is better."
"So, N.B.," Brian began, "how are you enjoying LA?"
"It's good, Brian," answered New Brian. "Jasper helped me take a picture of myself as if I'm holding the Hollywood sign, just like your ex's late husband, Derek. Wanna see?"
With that, New Brian brought out his cell phone and showed Brian a picture of himself, pre-Christmas when he wore his red bandana, positioning his arms as if he was holding the Hollywood sign.
Brian laughed. "Oh, my God, New Brian," he said, trying to control himself. "Jillian would love this."
"Yeah," New Brian said, putting away his phone. "Sorry I didn't meet Derek. He would have loved it, too."
"Anyway, listen," Jasper began. "New Brian and I are planning on visiting Quahog for the weekend. It would be the perfect opportunity for us to meet Vinny face to face."
"Oh," Vinny began, smiling, "that is wonderful, Jasper. Is Ricardo comin' with ya'?"
"Nah," Jasper replied. "He said he's going to the Philippines for the weekend to visit his parents. New Brian and I are wishing him luck."
"Well," Brian began, "I wish the both of you a safe flight here."
"Thanks, Brian," New Brian said.
"Yeah, thanks," Jasper added. "See you both on Friday."
As both Brian and Vinny put away their laptops, Vinny was the first to respond.
"Y'know, B," he said, "it's good to know you have a cousin who's also a white lab, and a friend who's a border collie. The friends at my old block are okay, too. Maybe someday, you'll meet another friend of mine, Georgette."
"Yeah," Brian said, wagging his tail. "Maybe I should."
"Well," Vinny began, "I think it's time both of us turned in for the night. See you in the morning, B-rye."
"B-rye?" Brian repeated in thought. "Nobody but Stewie's ever called me that before." He then said aloud, "Good night, Vinny."
And with that, both dogs went to bed in different rooms: Brian in Peter and Lois' bedroom, and Vinny in Stewie's.
The following morning, after breakfast, while Stewie was watching a rerun of Jolly Farm Revue, he heard Brian shout out "Oh!", and kept doing it for every two-thirds of a second. Stewie went into the kitchen and called to Brian.
"Brian?" he called. "What are you doing?"
Brian finally stopped Oh-ing and said, "I just realized in surprise that my computer has been infected by a virus, and I'm Oh-ing this out in surprise until I calm down, just like Vinny at times when he's surprised."
Cutaway: We see Vinny coming into the living room, about to talk to Peter and Lois on the couch.
"I just found out that some doof named Carter Pewterschmidt is about to foreclose that day care center Stewie goes to," Vinny said to them.
"Oh, my God," Lois said.
Vinny continued, "I'm having a few dogs at the alley form a conversation on finding out who this Carter Pewterschmidt is."
"He's my father," Lois informed him.
"Oh!" Vinny shouted in surprise. "This is the twist I did not expect. Oh! Excuse me, I'm just gonna have to Oh this out until I'm not surprised anymore."
With that, he walked out of the living room and kept going "Oh!" every two-thirds of a second until he calms down.
Back to the kitchen.
"Chill, Brian," Stewie said. "It's no big deal. All you have to do is back up your files and then factory reset the thing, then reinstall your programs."
"Will that remove the virus?" Brian asked.
"Of course," Stewie informed. "And number two, you don't have to act like Vinny. Let Vinny himself do it for you."
With that, Stewie walked back to the living room, leaving Brian to back up his files.
Later that day, Vinny was in Stewie's bedroom typing on his laptop. Stewie took notice.
"Hey, Vinny," he said, walking into the bedroom. "What are you typing?"
"Hey, Stews," Vinny replied. "I'm just writing a self-help book, just like Brian did when he wrote Wish It, Want It, Do It. I'm callin' it Like It, Love It, Own It. For example, have you ever decided to like something and then have the heart to love it? If you do, you should own that something."
"Sounds to me you're acting more like Brian and less like yourself," Stewie said.
"Whaddaya mean, Stewie?" Vinny asked.
Stewie answered, "You need to act more like yourself and let Brian act like himself."
With that, Stewie exited his bedroom while Brian walked into it. Vinny noticed him come in.
"What's wrong, Brian?" Vinny asked. "Why is it that Stewie wants me to act like myself and not like you?"
"He said that to me, too, Vinny," Brian replied. "I was so surprised at my laptop getting a virus, I decided to Oh this out."
"I agree with Stewie, Brian," Vinny began, "you need to stop actin' like me. I wanted to write a book just like you."
Brian looked at the screen on Vinny's laptop.
"Like It, Love It, Own It, huh?" he said. "Sounds a bit like the title of my book. I agree with Stewie on what he said about you."
"Gee, Brian," Vinny said, shrugging. "I sure wish I could switch places with you just for a day."
"Yeah, me too," Brian replied.
Upon overhearing this, Stewie went back inside his bedroom and pulled the baseball bat that opened his secret lab.
"I think I can make your wishes come true," he said.
"You can?" the dogs asked.
"Of course, I can," answered Stewie. "I have an invention in my lab that can switch your minds."
"You do?" Vinny asked.
"I didn't know that," Brian added.
"Well," Stewie began, holding a ball about half his size, "now you do. Go ahead, hold the ball."
With that, Stewie handed Brian said ball.
"So, you want us to play ball or something?" he asked before a flash of light emitted from the ball.
"Well," Stewie began, "how does it feel?"
"Pretty weird, actually," Vinny said in Brian's voice.
"Yes," Brian agreed in Vinny's voice. "Anyway, why'd you hand us the..."
Both dogs gasped in shock and surprise at the sight and sound of what they just saw and heard.
"Oh, my God!" Vinny shouted in Brian's voice, still. "Vinny, you're me!"
"And you're me!" Brian shouted in Vinny's voice, still.
"Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!" both dogs kept shouting in surprise before they eventually calmed down.
"I think we can do without the Ohs, boys," Stewie said. "It's getting pretty annoying."