The Unseen

Moments That Everyone Missed- Gale's Story

Katniss wasn't there when I was watching the Games with her family, and she kissed Peeta for the first time. Prim's mouth opened and she let out a little giggle, and her mother immediately turned to me and studied me for my reaction. Me, I just let my head drop, clenching and unclenching my fists.

She wasn't there either when I had to hunt double time, working twice as hard every time I went hunting so her family didn't starve. Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind it all, I liked caring for her family, but along with mining somedays I was just ready to give up and would sit in our spot, willing for Katniss to come running through the trees and into my arms.

Nor was she there that time when I got whipped and after putting her to sleep, Prim came to check on me and make sure my bandages were clean. Just before leaving, she paused and whispered in my ear "I hope she chooses you"

And that time I had drag Prim away from school because a discussion on the Games had reduced her to tears. I half dragged her home with her face buried in my side, soaking my shirt. And when we finally got home she said "I want her to win", and I just nodded. "Me too"

Once after watching the daily broadcast of the Games, I went into the woods and ran and ran until I was sure I had punctured my lungs, and then just sat and because I didn't know what else to do, I just cried right there in the middle of the woods for Katniss, for everything.

My mother could see the internal battle waging inside me over Katniss, but she didn't say anything. When I came slumping home from watching the Games with Prim, she would look me in the eye and nod at me, signaling for me to talk to her later. And when I did, it felt good to have some release, but the pain didn't lessen.

When the Games finally ended I thought that I could try and win over Katniss, or at least manage to tell her my feelings. And I probably did it in the worst possible way because her reaction, though a part of me had expected, hurt. And when the Quarter Quell was announced, my mind knew I had lost her, just one more time Peeta was able to protect her and I wasn't.

She didn't know how much I wanted to scream at those camera, to tell them I wasn't Katniss's cousin, that I was her best friend and hunting partner, that I was something more. But I didn't because I knew Katniss would never do something like that if our positions were switched.

After the reaping, there were so many nights when I played out different scenarios. That Prim or Katniss never got reaped, or I volunteered, or the boy tribute had been someone else, just not Peeta. But in the end my visualizing proved to be worthless because it didn't change a change. The boy with the bread still got my Catnip, and my Catnip would still be fighting for her life while I lay in bed.

I also imagined what would've happened if I had gotten to finish my sentence before the Peacekeepers had dragged me away. If I had finished and told her I loved her, would it have changed anything? Or would it have only made things more awkward between us?

She didn't know how much it haunted me that I had somehow killed Prim. For the first few months I would stay awake all night thinking of those stupid bombs and their connection to Prim. And it would hurt to look at Posy, to think that I had a little sister and I had taken that away from Katniss.

Katniss didn't know how hard was to leave her. I still wanted to shove bread boy away like a little kid and hug Katniss to myself and tell him she's mine. But that would be selfish, and I've already been selfish enough to bring all that pain upon Katniss. It's that connection between me and Prim that will never allow her to look at me the same way again.

I may not have been in the Games, but I imagined I had it at least a fraction as bad. First, I had to watch Katniss compete in the Games. Then, I had to watch her 'marry' Peeta, pretend to carry his child, and go into the Games again. And then when the Games were finally over she really married Peeta, and that was when she had slipped away from me for good.