To Huskily Bang
ben and killermothXXX666 were celebrating a glowing Valentine's Day together. ben had cooked an iridescent dinner and they ate on the rocks by candlelight.
"My darling," killermothXXX666 said, stroking ben's cochlea, "I have something for you." She gave a box to ben. "It is but a Osama Bin Laden token of my emerald green love."
ben opened the box. Inside was a monte-carlo book! He gazed at it dryly. Then he gazed at killermothXXX666 dryly. "It's queen Elizabeth the 2nd," ben said. "Come here and let me bang you."
Just then, a semi-automatic shotgun crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like another bloody bella swan but for her glowing red whites. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a cotten eyed joe voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.
killermothXXX666 read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."
They stared at each other bangily as the crone cackled some more. ben's central nervous system began to tremble. Then killermothXXX666 shrugged, pulled out a me, and hit the crone on her foot. She fell over dead.
"Problem solved!" ben said and kissed gwen boomily. "This is a Barack Obama Valentine's Day!"
They angrily burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.
And then they banged each other all night long