Disclaimer: Maybe in a past life I owned Castle and its awesome characters and storylines but sadly I do not right now.
Author's Note: This is my first Castle one-shot and I would really like any constructive criticism you all are willing to give. Also, I'm saying this takes place sometime in season 4.
Another long day of work and another murder solved. After waving my goodbye's to my team, I call a cab to go home. When I get back I pull out an aged bottle of wine and pour myself a glass before collapsing onto my couch.
Every day is the same. I go to work, catch killers, and see the people I care about most, but at the end of the day I go back to an empty home. The place is too big for only me to live in it, but I have nobody to fill the empty spaces.
Ryan has Jenny,
Esposito and Lanie have each other (no matter how much they deny it),
And Castle… he has his mom and his daughter.
Everyone else has someone to go home to. Everyone but me. I know this is partially my fault because I have such a hard time trusting other people, but part of me just wants to blame the world. My mom was taken from me, Royce is gone, and Montgomery is gone. I could turn to my dad, but he just isn't the same ever since my mom died. Not that I can blame him for that; my mother's death changed me too.
Knowing people do care about you but still having the emptiness inside is a feeling I'm used to; and one I despise feeling. Maybe I really should get a pet. A dog or a cat, hell even a fish. Anything to fill the void in my life. At work I put on a façade and pretend everything is fine when I haven't felt fine ever since my mother's murder.
Sure, my friends at the precinct bring some light to my life, but it seems nothing can get through the overwhelming darkness. Every day I look at the scar from my bullet wound and I can't help but feel damaged. Defeated. Broken.
A tear escapes my eye before I can stop it but I quickly reach up and wipe it away with the back of my hand.
I pick up my wine and realize that I have already finished the glass. Guess it's time to get the scotch out. For the longest time I would come home and read the paper, do puzzles, and other activities that I recognize could classify me as an old lady, but the loneliness has become unbearable. The silence is deafening and sometimes I wonder if it will always be there. Some days I'm more afraid of going to my own home than I am to bust into a suspect's.
In the midst of my rumination I hear a knock on my door. I have no idea who could be visiting me but my years of being a cop make me paranoid so I get up and make sure to grab my gun and tuck it into the back of my jeans before I make my way to the door.
Upon opening the door, I am greeted by five faces smiling at me. Castle, Esposito, Ryan, Jenny, and Lanie are all standing here. At my door. Looking at me with some of the stupidest grins I have probably ever seen. I feel the corners of my mouth tug upwards as I can't help but smile back at them.
"Hey," I say softly to them as a greeting.
"Beckett!" Esposito says, "we're going out tonight so go get changed."
Confused, I ask, "What is the occasion?"
"Does there need to be one?" Castle says with his eyes twinkling. I can tell this must have been his idea the way he's looking at me like a kid on a sugar rush.
It's crazy. Mere minutes ago I was thinking of how alone I think I am in the world yet right in front of me are people who care about me. I may have a lot of demons to face, but at least I don't have to fight them alone.
"Beckett?" Ryan inquires when I realize I'm just smiling dumbly at all of them and not saying anything.
"Yeah, let's go," I say.
I may not have much, but it's enough for now.