Just One Night
Is there anything more painful than to have the one you love stand beside you, knowing you can't have her?
"Takeshi?"
When the knock and the call that came after it reached his ears, Takeshi quickly paused the game and jumped out of bed. He made sure all of his top's buttons were in their proper holes and then rushed to the door. Lilika stood at the corridor outside his room in a pink nightgown when he opened it. She was over for the night. Her father was out of town with Yuyha to conduct some deal with relation to their gearfighting club and left her to the Manganji family's care. Which was just logical. The last time Takeshi had been to the Marino's Yuyha and Kouya shared a single room and slept in bunk-type beds. They probably still did. Here however…the little information that the guestroom Lilika would be staying in was right next to his room had somehow slipped out of his mind. Takeshi started to mentally curse himself for that.
"Uh…sorry, Lilika. Did I wake you up?" he asked, stepping aside so Lilika could enter his room if she wanted to.
"No, Takeshi," she replied with a soft smile and entered the room timidly. Takeshi noticed her loose, slightly tousled hair and realized she just came from the shower. "I'm sorry for bothering you so late at night. It's just…too quiet in my room."
"No, it's okay," Takeshi reassured her as he closed the door. "Uh…you wanted to talk or something?"
Lilika nodded with the slightest bit of hesitance. To Takeshi, it looked as if she didn't quite know why she was there at all. But that was ridiculous. Lilika never did things she had no reason to do so. He saw her eyes rest on something behind him and realized that his game was still on pause.
"What were you doing?" Lilika asked with her eyes now on his back as he approached the TV set.
"Playing games," he replied as he turned them off. Big mistake. They were plummeted into complete darkness. "Oops. Sorry, Lilika, I'll turn the lights on. Wait a sec."
"It's alright," Lilika replied and Takeshi found himself looking for her instead. She had walked up to the large window through which moonlight streamed into the room. She was surrounded with the ethereal glow of it and Takeshi drank in the scene, unaware that he was staring. She looked...divine, godly. There was no other way to describe the scene in front of his eyes. If someone were to tell him right then and there that the girl in front of him was Goddess Venus the fairest, he would willingly believe that someone. Lilika…
He loved Lilika. Not just because of her beauty, but also because of her kindness and gentleness. Hers was the most compassionate heart he had ever known. He loved her. He had loved her for as long as he could remember, practically forever, even as a child who was supposed to not understand what love truly was. He often wondered if she had ever noticed it. However, the likelihood of that was next to nothing because she…
…loved someone else.
Yuyha.
Reason. That was what ruled his life. Except for his love for Lilika, everything else in his life made sense. Even Lilika's love for Yuyha and his for her. It only made sense that they should be together, the daughter of the owner of a gearfighting club and the captain of its gearfighting team. They were meant to be together, Takeshi knew this, and he had opted to stay in the side-lines and just watch his two best friends, happy that they were happy with each other.
But…
…at times like this...
...he truly wished things were different.
"Takeshi? Takeshi?" Lilika was calling him. Her tone of voice suggested it wasn't the first time. Takeshi snapped back to reality and he quickly made his way to the wall and switched on the lights with an apology. The room was instantly filled with a soft blue glow.
He turned back to Lilika and found the girl lost in her own thoughts this time. He knew the right thing was to call out to her but his heart told him to just savor this moment. He leaned against the wall and unabashedly stared at the girl. After awhile though, it didn't look as if she was going to return to reality any time soon and guilt started to gnaw at his stomach for having surrendered to his heart's whim.
Takeshi pushed off the wall and walked towards Lilika. She still didn't notice. He tapped her lightly on the shoulders and her eyes widened. She looked up at him in half-surprise and half-confusion before realization hit her and a faint blush played across her cheeks. Takeshi personally found it rather charming.
"Sorry, Takeshi. I was just…daydreaming, I guess," Lilika apologized and offered him a smile. He smiled back.
"It's okay. This night is sure full of apologies though," he said with a shrug. Little did he know that the hardest apology for him was yet to come. "…What were you thinking?"
Lilika sighed as she glanced at him and then out the window again. Her eyes reflected the moon, which was a perfect full one that night. "You're my best friend, Takeshi, and I trust you. So I suppose I can tell you…" Takeshi couldn't read Lilika's voice. Was she sad, thoughtful, or what? It frustrated him to no end. "It's about Yuyha."
Yuyha?
"What about him?" he whispered.
"I…I don't know. It's just that lately…lately I've been thinking. About us. Does he really love me? Sometimes it seems as if we're only together because we have to be -- my father being the Tobita Club owner and he the team captain and all that. Because people expect us to be. Sometimes, I just wonder. What do you think, Takeshi?"
Her green eyes turned to look at him hopefully. His heart told him that this was his chance to finally have Lilika and be happy. Reason told him that he had to tell her what was truth, what made sense. As usual, he listened to reason.
Takeshi cupped Lilika's face with both of his hands and looked at her seriously. "Don't say that, Lilika, don't. Yuyha loves you. He loves you very much. You know that, deep in your heart I know you do. He would do anything for you, Lilika."
As I would.
Lilika smiled back up at him. He smiled back. However, before he realized it or could control it, his lips were upon hers. He kissed her. And the kiss was sweeter than he had ever imagined it would be.
He knew it was wrong, a mistake. Reason ruled his mind, logic. Takeshi tried to pull back, but found that he couldn't. His mind screamed for his body to do so but it paid no heed to his mental orders, listening instead to what his heart had to say. Both of Lilika's hands rested on his chest and for awhile she tried to push him back, but then eventually melted into the kiss. Her lips softened against his and began to follow his lead. Takeshi's hands fell from her face and instead encircled her small waist. Her slender wrists crossed at the back of his neck and he pulled her closer still, if that was possible. After some time both found the strength and will to break the kiss, oxygen suddenly a much needed element.
Lilika immediately buried her face in his chest. Her hands dropped to his shoulders which she grasped weakly and Takeshi felt her body slightly lean against his as if she couldn't stand on her own. The scents of her shampoo and his cologne made the air between them heady. Takeshi found himself unable to speak for awhile and coldness spread on the front of his pajama top as Lilika's still wet locks dampened it. However, at some point, he could feel warmth. Tears. Lilika's tears forced him to speak up.
"Lilika, I didn't…I don't know what…I'm sorry," Takeshi apologized as he gave up on his attempts at explanation. What was there to explain anyway? He kissed her when he well knew he shouldn't have.
Lilika shook her head against him and then said something muffled. He felt her shiver and heard the first of many sobs escape her. Takeshi did his best to be comforting, stroking her hair and tracing calming circles on her back. When she calmed down a bit, he placed his hands on her shoulders and took a step back. She stared down at the floor and wouldn't look at him. Takeshi placed his right hand on her cheek and forced her to look up. Tears still streamed down her cheeks. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind one ear and wiped the salty beads away.
"Don't cry…" he whispered.
Lilika shook her head. "We shouldn't have…I shouldn't have…this shouldn't have happened," she whispered back, right hand lifting to rest against his cheek as well. He didn't notice when his own tears had started but there they were, on the tips of Lilika's fingers as she moved her hand to dry his other cheek. "I…" She turned her eyes away from his again. "…I love Yuyha."
Takeshi held her by the chin and directed her to face him. "I know," he simply replied, a small, sad smile coming to his lips as a look of pain filled his eyes. Pain he knew he would never be able to get rid of.
"You...Takeshi…" Lilika breathed, falling forward. Takeshi caught her in his arms but her knees finally gave up on her completely and slowly they both fell down to the carpeted floor of his room. Then the tears started all over again.
She felt confused. She never noticed it before but after what just happened now, she realized how Takeshi had always been there for her, how he cared so much to be just another friend. But he knew. All the while he knew that she loved someone else yet he loved her. She loved Yuyha...or did she? Then why did that kiss feel so right? And what did she come here for in the first place, if not Takeshi himself? Did she…did she love Takeshi? No. The answer came to her almost too easily. She loved Takeshi, but her love for Yuyha was stronger. Their kiss was sweet but that didn't change the fact that she loved Yuyha, and that he loved her.
"Takeshi…I really do love Yuyha. I'm so sorry…" she admitted, looking up to meet sad but smiling dark eyes. A mask…he had always hidden it from them.
"It's okay. I'm not asking it of you, Lilika. Just…" Takeshi's smile saddened a bit more and he leaned forward. Lilika met him and allowed him the short bittersweet kiss. "…one night. Please give me tonight, if only tonight."
Lilika smiled back almost equally sadly and nodded her head. "Just one night," she whispered and pressed her lips on his.
Owari.
Author's note/s: Finally finish! And I'm alive again in the world of CGT fanfiction. *wink* Lately, I've been seriously thinking of getting one of those muses other writers use...ne, I'll probably be stuck with Melpomene, Greek muse of tragedy (I played her during our Pandora's Box Debate back in sixth grade. Don't ask)...anyways, this went well, I think. I didn't even mean for it to be an angst fic and it turned out as a semi-one!...Or maybe I was overreacting when my eyes teared up at Takeshi's last lines? lol. In any case, please tell me what you think.
Dedication/s: This fic is dedicated to all the members of takeshixlilika especially Kazie Solo, AU princess of CGT Fanfiction, who happens to be the greatest fan of this pairing that I know of. Also, to yammi, Parody princess of CGT Fanfiction, for all the recent support she's been giving me lately along with Kazie. I love you guys! And, of course, to the members of CGC. Where are you people?!