A/N: This was written for Penelope Wendy Bing for Secret Santa Exchange 2010. MERRY CHRISTMAS PEN!
I am not SuCo
That first year had been a mess, everyone was still trying to make sense of the world that was around them, it was a more peaceful world, but still life, and life was always messy. Messes had to be cleaned, fields planted, the help form District 11 came in to help with the planting, new houses had to be built to house them, and for all the people of District 12 returning from District 13.
The aftermath of war was no more than a war itself.
Peeta baked bread. He had help from several other young men in rebuilding his family's bakery. He made cakes, and cookies, and every sweet thing you could imagine, and whatever he felt like making but there were always fresh loaves of cheese bread set out, and one he kept in back to bring home.
Katniss hunted. Her world had fallen apart, but that didn't mean the entire world stopped moving ahead. She needed to be productive somehow. Slowly she began selling the meat and pelts of the game she brought home, collected seeds for home remedies that could be planted nearer to the people, and brought home some wild herbs that the baker was fond of using.
Yes life pushed onward over that first spring and summer, but winter was closing in all around them, and so were the holidays.
Katniss' mother refused to return to District 12. She demanded to stay and work through the year. Haymitch stayed around the former Victor's Village houses and used the holidays as an excuse to get even more drunk than usual. Katniss tended the potted Primrose plants she kept in her house, with silent tears dripping into them with the water she gave them. Peeta was often caught up to his elbows in dough as he stood motionless staring at the wall, a haunted look in his blue eyes.
It was like it was all expected. They needed to come back together. It started off slowly, with him dropping off little cheese rolls wrapped up in solid paper on her doorstep. Soon it was her walking through town by his shop. They don't know how they grew back together but before long they were friends again, and soon, lovers.
Peeta only left her house to go to the bakery. She only left to go hunting. They were constantly together. They were the only ones that could manage to help each other through the memories of their past.
Peeta would freeze in the middle of his work, staring into the fires of his oven as a cold look fell across his blue eyes, reminders of children dying in every way imaginable just beyond that blue gaze.
Katniss would often wake everyone in her house with the screams that filled her nightmares. She was helpless from protecting herself in her sleep as she relived all those days watching those she loved perish at someone's hands.
They were the only ones that brought comfort to each other. So it was expected that they would spend the holidays together, part of the time smiling and helping each other, the other times wrapped in each other's arms as the horrors pass through their memories. He baked Christmas cookies, giving little packets of them to the school age children to enjoy, and brought even more packages of the treats home to her. She could rarely eat them without shedding a tear or two over the tiny little flowers, and flying birds he often put on the cookies he made just for her. Primrose and Mockingjays.
She found bushes of holly, and a Christmas tree to bring back into their home for them to enjoy. She decorated their house in leafy green boughs and sprigs. Taking time to carefully make garland for their tree and keep the fire burning in anticipation for his return.
Their first Christmas Eve together was when he asked her. She said yes, of course. There were no cameras in their faces. No one was in the room with them. The only light was cast by the twinkling stars outside and the warm glow of embers in the fireplace. There they sat, long into the evening, without a word to say, they didn't need to say anything to begin with.
There first Christmas Day was when they began to open there eyes to what was happening in the world that was around them. Their families before the war had been torn apart and lost forever: His to fires, hers to death and work. They had opened their eyes to their new families though. Friends from far off Districts return to see them. Some stay just a bit more sober than normal.
Haymitch brought one of his geese plucked and ready to be cooked, even if he says he wished he could throw a feast with all of them just get rid of a few. Annie comes in on the trains with her little baby, Shoal, all wrapped up in a blue blanket with sea green eyes peering up at all of them. Cards from friends in District 13, 2, 3, and people in the Capitol all come rolling in with the mail. Katniss' own mother arrived For only the day, bearing gifts from President Paylor herself, and even Plutarch.
This new, but aged, family gathers as Peeta carves the goose, Haymitch drinks, and Katniss scowls at the new Clock Beetee brought them with all the little cogs and wheels turning in perfect order behind the glass. Everyone smiled and cheered when Peeta announces their engagement. They'll be married in the spring. Only the people in that room were to be invited, and it was not to be televised, only announced.
That was much how their next fifteen years passed. Peeta's constant desire was never even allowed in Katniss' eyes though, until finally 15 years later she consented. Later, their little girl, Finna, was born.
That year at Christmas, she was spoiled much like Shoal had been. Her little cap of dark hair and scowling blue eyes peered out from a green blanket until her father took her up in his arms making her laugh and giggle. Finna's grandmother cooed at the baby and smiled at her daughter and son-in-law, she was finally a grandmother.
The little family of three thought that had been the best Christmas they had ever had, until the one they had two years later when the baby boy was added to mix. Little Rimmick was Katniss' baby boy, following her everywhere with his smiling gray eyes and refusing to be put to sleep by anyone other than his mother.
There little family was complete: The bright young girl, dashing baby boy, charming father, and protective mother. Everything was complete, with their adoptive Uncle Beetee, Aunt Annie, and cousin Shoal. They had their grumpy 'Uncle Hay', the sweet Grandma Everdeen, and their favorite 'Aunty Sae' always there.
The little family wasn't really little, but it was a happy one.
~x~X~x~
"Please Aunty Sae!" Finna begged the elderly woman who had taken care of the girl's mother in the aftermath of the war and acted as a nanny to them now. "Just tell me one more time how Papa asked Mama to marry 'im."
"You're nine years old girl; I think you can go to bed tonight without another story." Greasy Sae told the girl and tucked her firmly back into place. She turned around to do the same to the little boy but found him missing. "Now where did your brother go?"
Finna shrugged.
"I have him," called a voice from the hall.
"See there's your mother, you better be to bed, it's Christmas Eve child." Greasy Sae turned to the girl and found that she had let out a squeak and fell back onto her pillow.
Katniss came through the door. She was no longer the spritely young thing that was more squirrel than human. Crow's feet etched their way around the gray eyes that watched a war unfurl twenty years ago. Dark hairs fought the braid that constrained them and the few silver hairs found within them. She had her son asleep on her hip as she gently lowered his blond curls onto his pillow and covered him gently. She placed a light kiss on top of his before turning to the old woman. "I found him watching me stretch some hides out back."
Katniss looked down and the still lump in the blanket as Greasy Sae tried to hide her smile as she wandered out the door. When the door clicked shut the blankets began to pull back down until blue eyes looked out from under them. They met with the pure gray ones of her mother. Finna squeaked and covered her head again.
Katniss gently tugged the blanket out of her daughters grip so she could look at the girl. "It's time for bed, dear one. Tomorrow will be a busy day. Aunt Annie will be here, So will Uncle Beetee, and Shoal is coming all the way from the Capitol to bring his mom here and to see us. And I need you to help Haymitch catch a goose for supper first thing in the morning."
"Shoal's coming?" Finna grinned up at the woman.
"I won't let him in the house if you're not asleep tonight," Katnis told her daughter with an arched eyebrow. Soon the little girl wrapped herself up and fell to sleep as Katniss left the room, only to find her husband giving her a skeptical look. "What?"
"You know quite well you would let Shoal into the house without a second a thought," Peeta grinned at her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. His forehead had worry lines and the gray in his hair was only hidden by the blond, but his youthful smile could never abandon him.
The next day, Finna happily scampered off to help Haymitch catch and prepare a goose for their Christmas Day feast. Peeta started in the kitchen before sunrise pulling fresh sweet rolls and bread from the oven, as Katniss took Rimmick with her to gather some fresh plants from the forest for dinner.
Soon, people began arriving at their home. First was Katniss' mother, who came four times a year. Rimmicks' Birthday, Finna's Birthday, Christmas, and once during the summer when the meadow was in full bloom. She quickly took over helping Peeta in the kitchen and shooed Katniss out to begin preparing the rest of her home with Rimmick.
Haymitch followed with a goose slung over one shoulder and a nine year old girl joyfully running around him, but Finna removed herself from him to see where her father and grandmother were up to in the kitchen.
Annie and Shoal rushed in from the winter breezes. Shoal sheltering his mother with a protective arm around her shoulders from the blasts of winter weather. Taking her coat and his own before hanging them in the closet. His handsome face brightened when Katniss put down some of the garland she and Rimmick were hanging and then went to great them, but Finna beat her to it.
"Shoal!" screeched the little girl as she threw herself into his waiting arms and he tossed her into the air while giving an apologetic wink and smile to Katniss.
Annie smiled at Katniss and went to her and the boy. "He reminds me so much of his father."
"He's growing into a good man, just like his father," Katniss told to older woman. "Finnick would be proud."
A shadow appeared in Annie's eyes like she was about to forget where she was. "Mother," Shoal said and it pulled Annie back into the room with them. He gently smiled at her knowingly, he was just like his father. "If it's alright with you, and Katniss of course, I'm going to take the charming young girl's challenge of this so called 'snowball fight' out back."
Katniss chuckled as Shoal took Finna outside, Rimmick, struggling with his boots, stumbled out after them. Annie took her arm and led her into the kitchen to greet Peeta.
Quick knocking on the door pulled Katniss away from the people in her kitchen to see who was at the door. She opened it to find Beetee. The older man had years to show in the lines on his face, and the stagger in his steps, but his mind was sharper than almost all of them in the house.
"Beetee, I'm glad to see you doing well." Katniss helped him remove his coat.
"My goodness its cold here. I brought your little ones a little something, it's still in its prototype form, but very safe I promise you. Keeps them entertained for hours. Might take a moment or two setting up, it has tracks and everything for it. I'll see to it that when the newest comes out the final that it, it will be sent over to them right away-"
"I'll let them know, I'm sure you and Shoal would be perfect to put it together." Katniss lead him into the living room before calling for the children to come back inside.
The finishing touches on dinner were being made by Katniss's mother and husband while everyone else had moved to the living room, Beetee watching the toy train that ran off of a little liquid fuel or solar energy ran around the room, with Rimmick and Finna watching it joyfully. Shoal had put the television on to see what the weather had in store for them tonight and to see if his mother and he would be able to leave the next day as planned.
A public announcement came and a voice spoke about security of the Districts' border being double checked to make sure nothing was going to turn badly while Panem celebrated over the winter. A gray eyed Commander came on briefly and said that he would personally be seeing to many of the borders safety with his army and would report back throughout the sweeps. Shoal quickly turned off the television and glanced at Katniss. She hadn't spoke to her friend Commander Hawthorne since the war, and Shoal's mother explained it the best she could to him, the only reason he knew Gale was from meeting him with work in the Capitol or with Beetee.
Katniss removed herself from the room silently to go and check with Peeta.
Everyone was smiling when they sat down for supper. Not a frown could be seen as food was passed around, or stories exchanged. Haymitch was in the middle of a story about when Finnick was younger and was trying to make Katniss as uncomfortable as he could with flirting and laughing at her in his full glory, Shoal held his mother's hand so that she didn't slip away on them but stayed in the present adding her own tidbits every so often about Shoal's heroic father.
Then a door knock roused them from their laughter. Peeta went answer it as Beetee started to tell them about a time Finnick and his friend Wiress were in the middle of a debate about clothing. The pro's and con's about the material itself.
Then Peeta walked back into the room with a careful smile on his face. "Look who has finally decided to join us after so many years." He gestured behind him and a short, older woman with dark brown hair and eyes followed him into the room. "Go ahead and have a seat Johanna."
Johanna sat tentatively and glanced at Katniss momentarily. She had all but exiled herself from her old Victor friends, particularly Katniss, when she had married the gray eyed hero of District 12. "So was that the time Finnick declared all human beauty should be on display, ripped off his shirt and caused those people to wreck the food cart?"
"And Wiress pointed at them and told him 'my point exactly'," Beetee finished and the table broke apart in laughter. Even Katniss smiled.
"Who's Finnick, and Wiress?"Rimmick asked earnestly from his mother's elbow.
Everyone in the room became silent. Not sure how to explain it to such a young boy. Finna had heard the stories, but she had yet to piece them all together. Even Shoal went about his questions carefully, knowing they hurt his mother, and only got most of the information he knew from second hand accounts in the Capitol.
Beetee took on a look of sadness but only seemed to be focusing on something on his glasses. Peeta's eyes fell into shadows as he tried to pull apart the real memories and the fake ones while he and Katniss clung to each other's hands. Annie silently started to sway back and forth, as Haymitch took another, longer drink from the white liquor he kept in flask on his hip. Johanna stared mildly at the glass of water set out in front of her.
Finally, it was Katniss' mother that answered for them all. "They were heroes of the war and friends to us all. Finnick was Annie's husband, Shoal's father. Wiress was a friend of Beetee's from District 3."
"They are some of the people I tell you about in the sotries," Greasy Sae continued. "But to put it simply, they were heroes like everyone else."
Yes, this family was a bit jumbled, and surely damaged, but they helped to create the life that they were all given now.
They were all they had left in the world, and they intended to make it last, but they would also remember their friends from the pas; the quirky woman with her thoughts a bit of a mess; the handsome young man that did all that he could for the ones he loved best; the friends that they had thought they lost, but kinship can be rekindled from seemingly just a glimpse.
From their moments of depression to their joyous laughter; they were a family created from the bonds of hardship. Few of them actually shared blood in their veins, but they all shared blood that had been lost.
What better time for them to reminisce than the holidays?