Title: Sweet Freedom.
Author:
SakuraSango
Rated: PG-13
Pairings: Subaru/Kamui. However it is
totally up to the reader
SPOILERS
for what happens to Katori
Warning: Look at the pairing,
angst-y, mentioning of blood,
Summary: And
like a child that was terrified at the storm outside, Kamui ran
noiselessly towards the bed, slipping in beside Subaru. Curling up,
he buried his face in Subaru's chest as the fabric soaked up the
tears that escaped. Subaru leaned back, lying down slowly as he
hugged the other boy close to him.
A/N: Ok so this story
covers 30_angsts and un_love_you at livejournal. But I was amazed at
how wonderful it worked out for both. So I decided to go with it (it
was originally written for just 30_angsts).
x-x-x-
'No don't. Please stop Fuma. No. Don't!' Kamui screamed in his head as he tried to block the memories. He had been told it was not good for him to remember them. Silently he tugged the blankets up to his nose, closing his eyes trying to ignore the pictures of blood and dismembered bodies. 'Please Fuma don't she's your sister. Don't kill her. Don't!'
With one last gasp he stilled his breathing, forcing himself to mimic sleep. Off to the side he could hear the door crack open as the hall light fell onto his closed eyes. Without flinching he lied perfectly still, hoping that he could trick whoever had come in to peek at him.
If not he knew they would want to sit with him until he did fall asleep. Which would never come. It never did. At least not without the nightmares. The horrible memories.
Tears stung at his eyes as Kamui watched the sword being plunged into Katori's chest, as he heard her last gasp of pain before her body stilled. The cuts on his body stung as tears ran down from his eyes, mingling with the blood spattered on his soft skin. Bloody tears. Tears that his best friend would never see.
Swallowing he kept still as he heard the phantom person stepped into the room, the shadow crossing over his lids. Breathing deeply he forced himself to not flinch at the shadow.
Silently he lied waiting until he heard the person shuffle out and close the door. Sighing Kamui rolled onto his back, an arm thrown over his eyes in an attempt to try to ignore the pain his his chest.
His chest tightened, almost like an iron grip holding his heart, thumping painfully. Gasping the teen forced himself to keep breathing. Each breath, though painful, would keep him living- at least that's what he kept telling himself as he forced each painful breath after another. The sharp pain slid down his arms and into the center the palm of his hands, forcing his fingers to curl at the sensation. His stomach twisting tightly.
Minutes drug by feeling more like decades as Kamui lied on his bed silently waiting. Waiting for everyone to decide to go to bed, for the lights to turn out.
As he lied in the bed, Kamui forced himself to keep from crying out as the memories replayed in his head. Each time it was the same. He screamed at Fuma, trying different things, begging to pleading to screaming out hurtful words to try to bring the sword into his heart. Yet each time was the same, he would watch the blade slide through Katori's skin, scraping along her ribs before piercing her heart.
Seeing the last light turn off, Kamui sat up in the bed. Off to the side he could see the thin curtains ruffle in the light breeze. Outside he could see the trees tremble as they rustled lightly, whispering into the late night sky. The moon was big, lighting the night sky with its silvery light; the moonlight filtering into the room.
Before he had come back to Tokyo, Kamui loved nights like these. He would sneak out of his window late at night, to sit in the large tree in the front yard, his legs dangling from the branches. It would just be to beautiful for him to ignore. His mother used to laugh at how he would spend the entire night outside but she would never tell him to come back in.
But now he was blind to the beauty of such nights. When he looked out all he could see was Katori's body falling down, lifeless.
Feet touched the chilled floor as Kamui slid out of the bed. Walking towards the door Kamui twisted the chilled knob careful to not make a sound as he pulled it open. Peeking out and around the corners the teen slipped out, walking on tiptoes as he closed the door behind him.
Silently he padded down the hall, fingers reaching out to the cooled wall, guiding his path down to the door at the end of the hall. He knew the boy down there would be able to take away his nightmares, make it so he could sleep peacefully again.
It had worked every other night so far for the past week. At first he had been reluctant to run for help, yet after two weeks of no sleep, the teen was desperate for help. He was feeling his mind slip; feel himself on the border of loosing it all. Being a Dragon of Heaven that was the one thing he did not want to happen. He needed his mind to be sharp and ready to defend his home and precious friends.
So a week ago he had first made this trip, after rocking himself for over an hour in his bed. Subaru gladly let the boy in, his presence helping to take away each of the nightmares as they came. Having gone through the same things, Subaru was able to help out.
Shaking he had tapped at the door, his fingers barely making a sound, before slipping into the quiet room. Shutting the door silently behind him, Kamui froze staring at the figure lying in the large bed. He should leave...This wasn't fair after all to have Subaru do this. It wasn't right! He should be old enough to take care of himself...Besides if he couldn't do that, then what good was he to the world?
"Kamui," the figure shifted slightly, pushing up on his left arm to get a better look at the boy standing by the door. "Are you ok?" Subaru always asked that every night, even though he knew Kamui wasn't.
Digging his toe into the soft carpet, Kamui lowered his head eyes focused on the floor before him. Slowly he shook his head, as another vision of Fuuma jamming the sword into his younger sister's chest. Gasping he wrapped his arms around his chest, doubling over as the pain overtook him. Sharp gasps broke from the boy's mouth as he tried to breath again, his lungs freezing.
Tears pricked at the corner of his eyes as hands flew up to his ears. He tried to block out the screams...the cries. Bile rose up as he stared at the floor.
The sound of sheets moving made the boy wake from his nightmares, as he glanced back up towards the bed. Subaru had moved slightly to the side, as he tugged back the blankets. A hand lightly patting the spot next to him in the bed.
And like a child that was terrified at the storm outside, Kamui ran noiselessly towards the bed, slipping in beside Subaru. Curling up, he buried his face in Subaru's chest as the fabric soaked up the tears that escaped. Subaru leaned back, lying down slowly as he hugged the other boy close to him. Sometimes it hurt him to see Kamui broken like this. It reminded him of himself when he had gone through the same thing.
A soft hand rubbed soothing circles on Kamui's back as the boy pulled away. A sad smile crossed his face as he stared at the tear trails in the fabric.
"Sorry," he whispered. Fingers tranced the wet spots as he tried to keep from looking at Subaru. It was embarrassing for him to have to come every night here for help to sleep. When he turned four he had stopped sleeping with him mother, yet here he was having to sleep with someone to keep the fears away.
Subaru reached up, cupping Kamui's face, his thumb wiping away the tears. Wrapping his arm around the back of Kamui's neck he pulled the boy down. Gently he brushed his lips against Kamui's, ghosting the soft skin.
"Don't apologize," Subaru whispered against Kamui's lips. "You have nothing to apologize for. I'm here and I will be. Always."
Pulling him back down Subaru kissed Kamui again. Kamui sighed into the kiss, his hands rubbing along Subaru's chest. Slowly his arms slid to the bed, encasing Subaru's head as he leaned his weight on his arms. Pulling away, he smiled at the boy under him, already he could feel the visions slide away to the farthest regions of his mind. The screams and begging all that was left of his personal nightmare.
Leaning back down, he pressed his lips against Subaru's, golden eyes sliding shut as he lost himself. Subaru wrapped his arms around Kamui, pressing their bodies close together, as they molded together perfectly. Slowly Kamui traced his boyfriend's lips begging for access, which Subaru was more then willing to grant.
A soft moan fell from the boy as his tongue slipped in, tasting Subaru. Already he could feel the voices dimming to a background noise. A level he could live with, the death rales now nothing more then a whisper in the wind.
Subaru sighed as he pushed against the invading muscle, the two twisting in an enticing dance for dominance. After a while, with no winners around, Kamui slipped his tongue back. Pulling away the teen smiled, as the voices faded away into the black, his mind now clear and free.
Fingers brushed the pale skin as Kamui traced his lover's facial features, his fingers traveling down the same path he had learned a week ago. Slowly he shifted, trying to not think about the fact that he was currently straddling Subaru, or what him being on top of him was doing to the onmoyoji. Leaning back down he kissed along Subaru's jawline, tracing the gentle feature slowly, his fingers following where his lips had been. Subaru smiled as he hugged the boy closer, tilting his head slightly so Kamui could reach the porcelain flesh easier.
Carefully Subaru hugged the boy tightly rolling slowly until Kamui hit the mattress. Shifting lightly Subaru lied on his right arm, his left touching Kamui's soft lips. Leaning up slightly Kamui captured the fingers in his mouth, sucking lightly.
"Keep that up and I might not be able to stop," Subaru whispered heatedly. His head fell onto Kamui's shoulder, trying hard to keep from taking him right there.
Yet the warning fell on deaf ears as Kamui sucked harder, his tongue sliding between the fingers, tracing the tips before sliding back down. His eyes narrowing slightly, suggestively hinting at what could happen next.
"Ahh," Subaru breathed. Warm breath wafted over Kamui's ear, making the younger boy shudder lightly.
Swallowing he pulled his fingers out letting them slowly trail over the boy's chest pausing at the small nubs. Slowly he teased them through the fabric of Kamui's tee shirt.
"You're asking for it," Subaru whispered, making sure to keep his voice low. Glancing behind him, he made sure the door was shut, before sliding off of the boy, hands splaying over the thin body under him.
Kamui bit his lip as he stared, his breath speeding as he felt his heart race. Subaru's touches always drove him over the edge in ecstasy, bringing the boy to the brink of pleasure, almost to his breaking point. Even coming down, was pleasurable, as he was brought back gently to the real world, his mind cleared perfectly. He could always sleep perfectly afterwards, wrapped in Subaru's loving embrace.
Kamui was quickly brought back to the real world as he felt his pants slowly slide down, his back arching sharply at the touches. Whimpering his head fell to the side, as he gasped for air. Eyes fell on the large, full moon outside, as he cried out in pleasure. Maybe he could learn to love the beautiful nights like this.
