You paced around your bedroom and looked at the strange book. It was black leather and unsettling. You found it in the woods near some old castle. You dont know why but you took it home.
Sitting on your bed you opened it up. Opening it revealed beautiful illuminated pages and interesting words. Reading a little closer unveiled that these were spells. You cronched on some all dressed chips as you read through it.
"Why not try one?" You thought. Flipping through you see one that seems simple enough. Candles and a simple incantation (though it was all in Swedish or something). You gather the candles and light them in a pentagram on your dresser and recite the Swedish.
The room goes dark except for a dull lit lamp in the coroner. A voice speaks.
"Hullo."
"How'er ya now?" You respond nonchalantly.
"Good and you?" The thicc Italian accented voice says back.
"Oh not so bad." You replied.
A figure stepped out from the shadows. A man in black jeans, a dress shirt, blue crocks, and a suit jacket. His face painted? Like a skull. His hair raven black like a romantic goth.
"Well shit I didn't know I was gonna summon Skeletor." You said astounded.
"YOU FOOL I AM NOT THIS SKELETOR YOU SPEEK OF I AM PAPA EMERITUS THE THIRD UNHOLY SON OF LUSCIFER HIMSELF! I AM THE UNHOLY POPE!" The skeleton man rawred exdee.
"Alright cool. So then like what happens now?" You asked.
"Well that ees my spell book. You summoned me. From my Booty Call spell ;)))." Demon pope said smexily.
"Well fuck we gonna fuck? Shit I'm down for some casual sex. Pit'r patt'r lets get at 'er." You exclaimed. With that pawpaw emeritus climbed on top of you and started to kiss your neck. You were pushed down into your bed. The crumbs of all dressed chips biting into your skin.
The son of Luscifer took a claw and ran it down your tank top ripping it in half. He undid your jeans and ripped them along with your panties off you.
"Whoa pump the breaks." You said, the chunky skeleton stops.
"This tank top was my favorite tank top. It had the poster print for star wars episode vi on it. Whatever, continue i guess." You say resigned. The man continues. He slips two fingers into you and starts to tease you.
"You need me don't you ghuleh?" Questioned Emeritus.
"Ah fuck i guess." You respond. Papa sliped out and started to take his clothes off, teasing you with a strip tease.
"Like what you see ghuleh ;)))?" The unholy pope asked. You only gave him a smile because honestly you were still kinda salty over that tank top.
He slips inside you and starts to fuck you. You try to get into it but honestly hes bad. You let it go for a bit because its amusing to watch how worked up he was getting. Papa was becoming a moaning mess.
"Satan your poontang feels so good. Did you come yet ;)))." Papa huffed.
"Alright pump the brakes again." You say as you push the pope off you.
"I cant believe you just said poontang and honestly youre a lousy lay. Youre worse than the lax bros down the street." You say to emeritus as you start to gather his clothes. You throw them at the man as he gawks at you shocked. He tears up a bit.
"Fucking ten ply bud. Now get go scram." You say. The skeleton man poofs out of the room. Taking a can of hair spray, a lighter, and the book you head to your fire place and set the book in it. You flame throw the book into ashes making sure its thoroughly burnt.