Title: A Final Gift

Author: Special Agent Meg

Rating: PG – because it contains a character death.

Classification: Tragedy/Angst

Disclaimers: If I owned them, Ari would have been shot in more than just his shoulder.

Summary: After a member of his team is killed, Gibbs learns something special. Gibbs POV.

Spoilers: Blackwater and The Red Cell.

The clock strikes midnight, and that means it's now officially the day after the funeral. That means it's now also officially 90 hours since it happened. 90 hours and I still can't believe it.

The sawdust did it for me. I mean, it's not like I'd managed to forget, but I did okay until I saw the sawdust. Particles of dust floating in the air, illuminated by a light source. When I was a kid my mom told me they were sunbeams. I'd try and catch them in my hand.

That's what he was saying too. Just before it happened. He turned to me and just said "Sunbeams." I didn't understand him at first so he explained. Told me how he used to love to run through them, make the particles stir up even more. I asked him if he ever tried catching them.

He never got to answer.

The doctors said it was instant – that he felt no pain.

They didn't see his eyes.

I can't do anything without seeing those eyes.

I hear it happening again and I spin around, wondering where I'll see his body this time.

Last time it was at his desk – just slumped in the chair. The time before it was in the elevator, just like Chris. Another friend I had to bury.

I'm getting too old for this. Too tired. I can't do this one more time.

I hear it again. Louder. And realize that it's at my door.

Somehow I make my way up the stairs and look through the hole in the door. It's Tony.

He doesn't know what really happened. No-one does.

The public knows an NCIS agent was killed in the line of duty. A handful of the people in our office know that the agent was killed by an extremist trying to kill me. They don't know that he saw the gun and jumped in front of me to take the shot.

I'll never tell them.

I open the door.

"What is it, Tony?" My voice is so quiet I'm surprised he even hears it.

"Boss, did you know McGee wanted to be a writer?"

This conversation isn't making any sense.

"What?"

Tony hands me an envelope. "I went by his apartment earlier. I knew he'd have wanted you to have this."

I still don't know what he's talking about, but I take the envelope. "Thank you."

He nods and simply says, "See you," before loping down the walkway. I shut the door behind him and open the envelope. Inside is about a hundred pages of paper, all type-written.

I read the first page. And stop. Short.

The Continuing Adventures of LJ Tibbs by Tim McGee.

For the first time in 90 hours, I let a tear fall.

THE END