Harry Potter Christmas Challenge fic: write a fic based on the first Christmas song on your Pandora, iPod, radio etc.

Christmas Eve With You

Severus and Remus have a very awkward moment the Christmas before graduation.

{Setting: Christmas Break at Hogwarts, 1992. Professor McGonagall's classroom, just before Christmas break. Young Harry is there, helping make cards.}

"That's the last one, professor." {He holds up an envelope and sets it in a box.} "Not that I think Professor Snape's going to care."

"Don't be so sure, Potter." {Professor McGonagall waves her wand and the box leaves the room.} "Professor Snape may not like Christmas a lot, but even he deserves a little Christmas cheer."

"How do you figure? I saw him this morning being his usual self."

"Well…" {She sits down at her desk.} "Everyone was young once. Professor Snape's has a hard job, believe it or not. He has it a little harder than other heads of houses."

"Because he's Head of Slytherin? That's no excuse for him to treat the rest of us like crap."

"Ah, Potter." {McGonagall smiles.} "I suppose I could tell you a story. Years ago, when Professor Snape was a student, he and another student had a rather startling revelation."

"What happened to her?"

"Not her. Him. He's been away a long time, I'm afraid. But this was when they were a tad more innocent."

"Snape's a queer?"

"Older students like to experiment a little."

{Harry leans forward, his curiosity getting the better of him.} "What happened, Professor?"

{McGonagall leans back in her chair.} "Well, it was Christmas break. Both boys were staying at school that year. For reasons of their own…"

#

So few students stayed this year that there was one long table for the staff and students.

I sat down and opened the book and began to read through the spells, making annotations and notes with my pen in the margins. Pens are easier for studying. Same as highlighters. I always ask Mom to send them to me whenever she is able.

"Morning, Severus."

I look up, glaring at Lupin.

"May I sit here? The rest of the table is full."

I glare at him harder, but he's not going to leave. I want nothing to do with him. I can't get what happened last year out of my head. "Fine," I grunt, scooting a little to the right to make more space between me and the werewolf.

"Studying?"

"I like to keep busy," I say through grit teeth. "Shouldn't you be with your buddies?"

"No. Sirius went to James' and Peter's at home with his family. I'm…at odds with my family right now, so I'm staying here for the holidays. Need some space. What are you studying?"

I close my book and put my notes away.

"Is that a Charms book? I don't recall that being on the required texts list."

"Because it's not," I say, "Its light reading of my own.

Lupin stares at me.

"What?"

"And I thought I was the only one who did that," he says, holding up a book of his own. It was transfiguration. "I can't keep still unless I'm able to study. Even when I'm with the gang, I got my nose in a book."

I almost smile. Almost. Resisting made my face itch a little. I turn away. I feel awkward. I want to get back to the book, but I feel it'd be rude to do so. I refuse to glance at Remus.

"Hey, turkey!" he exclaimed, piling his plate when the platter came around. I take a slice and pass it on.

"Aren't you hungry?"

"Too much turkey makes you tired," I remind him. He stares at me, then at his plate. A tray of mashed potatoes is thrust under his nose. He takes the platter and takes a large scoop of the white fluff. I take about half his amount before passing it on.

The vegetables are bypassed by half the table. I expect Lupin to refuse them like the rest of us normal people, but he takes a large amount of that as well while I pass it on.

"Bloody hell, Lupin, what kind of stomach do you have? A black hole?"

"This? This is nothing. You should see how much Sirius and James eats. It's a miracle none of us are fat."

"And Pettigrew isn't?"

"He's a little bit, but he's actually rather burly. He doesn't look it, but he's actually the strongest of us. He's just mellow."

"And a bit of a coward," I mutter.

Lupin shrugs. But he doesn't defend Pettigrew either.

"LOOK OUT!" someone shouted. I don't know what the commotion was, but the moment I even had a grasp of it, it was too late. I looked up, as did Remus. A few girls were giggling over in the corner and blushing.

"Sorry, boys," Professor Slughorn said. "It won't stay still. That thing is causing way too much trouble."

"Ya think!" I shout at him. I can't help it. It's over me and Lupin. He's bright red. I'm just as red, I suppose.

"Kiss. Kiss. Kiss," Came an embarrassing chant from all around the table. At least the teachers had the decency to be horrified. Except for Professor Dumbledore, who has that nastily bright twinkle in his eye. I swear that man is crazy.

I stand and try to leave, but I can't go anywhere. I grab Lupin's arm and pull him up. He seizes his food and bag before walking alongside me. "Really?"

"Well, you're not going to kiss me, so I'm gonna eat." To make his point, he stabbed the turkey and stuffed it in his mouth. "Mmm…good turkey."

"You're disgusting, Lupin," I snap, dragging him out of the Great Hall.

#

"Professor."

"Yes, Potter?"

"You said he was experimenting. Getting ambushed by magical mistletoe isn't experimenting."

"The story hasn't gotten that far, yet, Potter. Patience."

"Yes, Ma'am."

#

Lupin put the empty plate on the rail and we walked up the stairs.

"Are you really that homophobic?"

"I'm not homophobic. I'm just not a queer myself. You, on the other hand, I have to wonder."

"Why?"

"You're a werewolf. Black's a dog."

"What? You're conjecturing I'm queer because Sirius and I are both canine in a way? That's rude. We're just friends. Besides, he and James actually are homophobic. Surefire way to get them to shut up is to tease how close they are."

I smirk. "Wish I knew that earlier."

"Oh, be nice," Lupin said, shoving me. "You're easy to get angry. That's why you get bullied so much. And if you haven't noticed. Just because James and Sirius mess with you, Peter and I never dared."

"But you never stopped them either. Like it or not, your friends are asses."

Lupin bows his head. "You're right. I should have kept a tighter rein on them. I'm sorry, Severus. They're nice guys once you get to know them and I mean really know them. They bullied me too at first. But you kind of was a bit nosy…"

"I thought you were doing something illegal and you were always hanging around Lily, so I was concerned for her."

"Well, you know the deal now," Lupin said, stopping us and leaning against the rail. "Look, I had nothing to do with what happened last year, Severus. I swear, I didn't know Sirius was going to do that. It was stupid of him. Honestly, he should have been expelled for that stunt."

"Well, at least someone agrees," I mutter. Lupin keeps staring at me. It's making me uncomfortable. "Why are you staring at me? Stop."

He straightens, grabs my robes and pulls me closer to him, crushing his lips to mine. I'm horrorstruck and rigid. Lupin's hands loosen their grip on my robes. One hand remained on my chest while the other stroked my cheek and grabbed the back of my neck, keeping us together.

It was probably a minute or more that felt like eons before Lupin released me.

"Well, now we can go our separate ways," he said looking up. Sure enough, the mistletoe was gone.

I don't know why, but I watched him go. I should have been furious, but I was still somewhat dumbstruck and my lips were tingling.

I turn away from him and went down the stairs.

But I didn't get far before I made a split second decision and ran back up them. I seized Lupin's wrist and pinned him against the stone pillar at the top of the stairs. I kissed him back.

"Mr. Lupin, Mr. Snape."

I jumped back. Lupin was staring at me as though I had lost my mind. I think I had. We looked at Professor McGonagall, who was red with furry and unable to speak. She was being held back by a smiling Professor Dumbledore.

"The school does have PDA rules. Just so you know. Five points from each of you. Keep a little distance, boys. Excuse me, I think Professor McGonagall could use a cobbler and some hot chocolate."

As Professor Dumbledore led Professor McGonagall away, I turned back to Lupin. He and I stared at each other for a few moments.

"What the hell was that?" I said first.

Lupin shrugged. "I just…Sorry. I guess…curiosity?"

"Yeah. I can go with that." Lupin looked hurt. It was pathetic, but also hurt me since I knew I had caused it. "Look, I'm…I'm still in love with Lily. I don't know what possessed me to…I'm sorry, Lupin. I don't…I just…don't f—"

"Nah. Nor do I. The mistletoe was part of it. It wouldn't have gone away otherwise."

"Yeah."

"Plus, we now know we're not queers."

"Very true."

I descend the steps, but I don't feel any better than when we kissed and every fiber in my being told me to go back. But me and Remus Lupin—we're enemies. And enemies don't make good lovers.

#

"Whatever happened to Remus?"

"He's still around, but I haven't seen him in a long time. I doubt he and Professor Snape saw each other since. You should get to the feast, Potter, before everyone wonders where you are."

{Harry stands.}

"Thanks for the story, Professor."

"And thank you for volunteering to help me, Potter. Remember…."

"Don't tell Professor Snape."

"I'll see you at the feast."