He always thought he`d stop, but the thing that got to him is Justin freaking Cole he always wanted her but he stepped into that dream and crushed it, you're probably wondering who I am and what I`m talking about, well I`m Zander lead guitar of Gravity five and the girl you might ask she`s my Best friend Stevie Baskara, I know what you thinking if you like her and you break up there goes our friendship, well that`s why I`ve kept it to myself for three years I never have the confidence to ask her out and it kills me to see her with Justin Cole, you`re probably wondering what I`m trying to stop, well you see everytime I hear about… him it hurts but I never show it in front of the band they would worry about me too much but ever since she started dating him I`ve cut myself to ease the pain, no one knows about it and I`m keeping it that way. One day it got bad Stevie wanted to know if she should you know with him and it sickened me, I told her no not until she feels she ready, that night the cuts got deeper and more blood came out and that day my mom found out she took me to a doctor to get them stitched. The next day it was really hot in the band room and I was wearing a long sleeved shirt the band kept telling pull up your sleeves it hot I kept saying no until Kacey rolled up my sleeves and they saw the cut and the stitches.
"Zander whats with the cuts"
"Don`t worry about it and I told you I didn't want to roll up my sleeves"
That day I remember so vaguely but I haven't talked to the band for a week so I figure forget them I can do good on my own, or so I thought, that week Stevie stopped by my house she wanted to talk, I could turn her so I said yes, she came over and she hadn't known about my cutting but she rolled up my sleeve and saw the stitches and cuts and started to cry, I told her not to but she couldn't help but feel that she could have helped me, I told her it`s not you it`s me I`m cutting myself not you I told her don't worry about me, she kissed me to be honest something I wanted to do for a long time but not this way not with her dating… him. I don`t remember the rest all I remember is waking up the next morning with her beside me I thought what have I done, I took advantage of her, I took the blade and started cutting myself and crying, I felt a hand on my hand and she took the blade.
"You need to stop"
"I can`t"
"Why not"
"Because…"
"Why"
"Because everytime I see you with him it kills me inside and you coming to me with problems you two have I sickens me and the way he wanted to take advantage of you it hurt and this is the only way I release that pain and I didn't tell you guys because you would have worried about me I don't need help I just want you and only you but I can`t have you because of Justin the world`s only douche bag"
"He broke up with me"
I looked at her and I saw that she was in pain that she was hurting because of Justin and right there I wanted to kill him.
"He broke up with you"
"Yes because I told him that I didn't feel the way he felt about me anymore and I told him I love someone else"
"Who"
"A guitar playing ukulele obsessed guy who is sitting here with me right now"
"You love me"
"Yes and I could tell you did too, when I first started dating Justin I could see it killed you inside and that hurt me and I knew that I didn't love Justin the way I love you"
She hugged me and took the blade and threw it away she said I will have no use for that any more.