Story: Justice League: Superman's Bad Day Remastered
Authors: Master Jin Sonata
Written: February 2007
Remastered: June 25th, 2016
Genre: Humor/Parody
Rating: T
Disclaimer: I do not own DC comics, or its unfortunate hero in blue
The Rising Mishaps
8:00 am
Clark Kent was snuggled comfortably in his bed within his high-rise apartment. Suddenly, his radio's alarm turned on at 8:00 am sharp.
"Gooood morning Metropolis! This is Lex Luthor with your morning wake-up call. And a special shout-out to Superman, who's identity will be revealed at 5:00 pm tonight!"
Clark immediately shot up out from underneath his covers as he heard this, hitting his head on his bed's headboard in the process.
"Ow!" he groans, now sitting on the side of his bed. "Was I hearing things?" he wonders. "Well, it looks like I'll have to give Luthor a little visit later today."
Clark sat up and began walking toward his bathroom, not noticing that his foot was caught on the loose sheets he tossed over when he got up. He suddenly trips and lunges forward, crashing headfirst into his dresser, leaving a giant dent on its side.
8:26 am
Clark was now in his bathroom. He grabs the tube of toothpaste, took off its cap, and began squeezing it onto his toothpaste. But forgetting that he has super strength, he instead splatters it all over his sink and mirror.
"Shoot!" he says, gritting his teeth. He turns around and reaches for a towel to clean it up, but realizes that he forgot to grab one. He steps out into the hall and opens his closet to grab said towel, when he notices a bright light coming from behind his window's curtain.
"What the?" Clark says as he went to his his curtain and opens it. A large news helicopter was hovering in front of his apartment with its beam-lights shining right at him.
"And here we find local newspaper columnist Clark Kent in his underwear! Wave into the camera for us!" yells the reporter from his megaphone.
"Hey! Go away!" Clark yells out to him, striding over to shut the curtain, but instead gets his foot caught in his sprawled bed sheets on his floor once more, causing him to fall forward into the glass window, crashing through it, and falling twenty stories before falling onto the concrete sidewalk below.
The newsman in the chopper caught the entire footage. He looked into the camera once more. "And now for the morning traffic report."
9:15 am
Clark Kent was in his car, right in the middle of the morning traffic rush. He blared his car horn as he was going to be late since his literal fallout earlier that day. He wasn't in a peachy mood at the moment either.
"Come on! What's the holdup?" he yells out of his window, when he was almost hit by a cyclist who rode past his car, knocking off his side-view mirror clear off his car.
"Hey! You get back here!" Clark yells, getting out of the car and running after the cyclist, weaving through traffic. Using his accelerated speed, he caught up to the culprit in no time near an intersection. He grabs him off of his bike and grins.
"Now, tell me why you didn't stop after you knocked off my car's mirror," Clark asks him, setting him down.
"Just trying to get to work on time, man," the cyclist responds.
"Well next time be careful. You don't know what can happen if your not careful in this traf—"
CRASH!
A metro-city bus out of nowhere collided into Clark before he could finish speaking. The cyclist shrugs and went on his way like nothing happened.
10:31 am
Clark Kent was finally at his job at The Daily Planet. He was at his desk typing up the next news article when his boss called him up from the building's intercom.
"Mr. Kent! Get in here!"
Clark gets up and walks into his boss's office, ignoring the snickers of his co-workers.
"Mr. Kent! Rumor around the office is that a video of you in your underwear in public earlier today was shown to everyone in Metropolis on the news this morning. Is this true?" his boss asks.
"Well…I…"Clark starts to say.
"Because if it really is you, you'll be fired immediately for ruining the image of our company's employees! So let's find out, shall we?" he continues, pulling out a videotape out from underneath his desk.
"Who gave you that tape?!" Clark insists, sounding a bit distressed.
"Why a lovely man by the name of Brainiac!" his boss says, about to pop the tape into the VCR.
"W-wait! You don't want this," Clark says, quickly reaching for the tape.
"Hey! Give that back!" his boss retaliates, grabbing a side of the tape.
The two began a tug-of-war for possession of the tape. Clark Kent was getting the upper hand.
"I'm warning you! Let go of this tape or I'll…" his boss warns him, before he suddenly lost grip of the tape. He stumbled back quickly toward his office window, where he proceeded in accidentally flipping himself out the open window.
"Boss!" Clark yells as he ran over to the window to try to catch him, but was too late.
"YOU'RE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRED!" his boss yells as he fell, crashing into a fruit stand at the bottom of the building.
Continue on to the next chapter!