She thinks about her current situation. The biological mother that she's never known. Spending most of her life, with more questions than answers. Wondering, what was wrong with her, that she wasn't wanted. She sits in her kitchen, sipping wine, feeling slightly guilty. Secrets have a tendency to eat away at us, until we can't take it anymore.
She drinks until the bottle is half empty. She takes a deep breath, and leaves the kitchen. She sloppily climbs up the stairs, to her room. She heads into her room. She makes a right, at the closet. She flips on the light, and slowly crosses to the back of the closet. She bends down, and begins her excavation. She digs through the shoe boxes. She finally finds the one that she's looking for.
The box itself doesn't look out of place, because it's a shoe box, in a closet full of shoes. At closer look, though, it clearly doesn't fit. The box is tattered, held together by duct tape. The shoes are not name brand. Maura takes the lid off the box. She peeks inside.
She digs through the contents. Of course, it's not surprising to her, that there are no shoes inside. She digs through the box of memories, her memories. Things she never wanted to forget. Others, that she had struggled with her whole life. The ones, that she wished so badly she could erase.
She pulls a picture out of the pile. She files everything else back in it's place. She puts the box back, and just studies the picture for some time. She stares at the innocent baby, wondering how anyone could ever give her away. She stuffs the picture back into the box, and closes the lid, again.
She leaves the closet, and heads to the shower. When she finishes she pulls on silk pajamas, and falls into bed. She closes her eyes, willing sleep to come, knowing that it won't come easily. Eventually it does, but it brings dreams. Her slumber is interrupted by a terrible nightmare.
It's 4 AM, and she's been up for three hours. She sits at the island, in the kitchen, sipping coffee. She finishes the mug of coffee, and makes a beeline for the couch. She flips on the TV, and watches the news. She falls asleep, as the 5 o'clock comes on.
The ringing phone wakes her. She rolls over, and grabs it off the coffee table, without looking. She answers, sheepishly.
"Dr. Isles," she yawns, "Ok, I'll be there shortly."
She gets ready to leave, quickly. She pulls her hair back into a pony tail, and tosses on the first decent thing that she can find.
Hours later, Jane gets off the elevator in the basement. She looks in autopsy, but Maura isn't there. The tech looks up at Jane, and smiles.
"She's in her office," he informs her.
"Thanks," Jane nods.
Jane steps into Maura's office, and finds her sitting at her desk, staring blankly at her computer screen. Jane reaches the desk , without Maura noticing. Jane clears her throat. Finally, Maura looks up, as Jane takes a seat.
"Is there something on your mind, today?"
"No, why?"
"You seem really distracted," Jane points out.
"I'm fine," Maura argues.
"Must I remind you that you aren't a good liar?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"You love to talk."
"No, I don't."
"Maura? Come on. Just tell me what's going on. Did I do something?"
Maura shakes her head, "The world does not revolve around you."
"So it has nothing to do with me?"
"Exactly."
Jane pulls a phone out of her pocket, she hands it to Maura, "You left this in my car," Jane rises. She steps away from the desk, and closes both of the office doors.
"Thank you. Why are you closing the doors?"
Jane pulls a scrap of paper out of her pocket, she hands it to Maura. "I am guessing that your distraction may have something to do with this."
Maura takes the folded piece of paper, "What is this?"
"Your phone rang a dozen times, while I had it."
"You answered it?"
"It was the same number. I thought that it might be important."
"Who was it?"
"A lady named Teresa McCoy. She said that she needed to talk to you. I asked what it was about, but she wouldn't tell me. She thought that you would know why she was calling."
"Ok, thank you."
"So who is she? And why was she calling?"
"I don't know."
"Why are you lying? What's going on?"
"Jane I don't want to talk about it."
"What has you so depressed today?"
"Something."
"That you don't want to share?"
"Exactly."
"Why today? Did something special happen today? I mean, it's a Tuesday. July 10th, isn't..."
"Jane, I would really appreciate it, if you could just leave me alone, for now."
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because I am worried about you."
"You have no reason to be."
"You haven't started your autopsy yet. You're usually done by now."
"I finished an hour ago."
"You didn't call to let me know."
"I am still examining all the findings."
"Why can't you just tell me what's bothering you?"
"There are some things that you don't need to know."
"Maura," Jane argues, "You're my best friend."
"That may be true, but I don't always do the right thing. Some times, I am not a very good person."
"Whatever it is, I'm sure that..."
Maura cuts her off, "I am not going to talk to you about it."
"Fine," Jane nods, and leaves the room.
As she gets onto the elevator, she decides that she is going to figure out what is bothering Maura, whether she wants to talk about it, or not.