Maybe he was just oblivious. Yeah, that had to be it. I mean, Dan would never hurt me on purpose. We'd been best friends for years now. He knew me better than anyone else in the world. And I knew him to the same degree. So why didn't he understand?
In 2009 when we meet he was just cute little Dan who wanted to meet his idol. He was a cool guy and I maybe liked him a little more than a friend should. Of course we became best friends and even moved in together after that. It just felt like we'd always been best friends. Nothing ever happened between us. I was happy just being his best friend and occasionally getting to cuddle up to him while watching movies. I was completely content with that until he started bringing them home.
The only reason Dan's so popular on youtube is because of me. I told him to just go ahead and post that first video. He would have nothing if it weren't for me. I try not to be bitter about things like this though. Sure he has like two and a half million subscribers and I only have one million. But I can't hate him for that. I could never hate him.
But you see, along with the fame came the girls. I don't mean the screaming twelve year old dangirls. I mean the older ones above the age of seventeen that he brought home. At first I didn't mind. I don't own him or anything, why should I? it wasn't until about the fourth time this happened and I actually heard them from my room that I started to feel like this.
It started as an uneasy feeling, making my stomach churn and heart ache. But it soon turned from this feeling of unease to anger. The feelings id been able to handle before were becoming harder and harder to deal with. I would just lie in bed at night and think about him with her. It made me so angry. The feeling of love I had for him was growing and intensifying so much I couldn't handle it. I was actually handling it quite well until I walked into the lounge to see Dan just casually making out with his newest girl right on our couch.
I broke after that. I'm not afraid to say I did, because I know I did. I stayed in my room all day. Not wanting to walk out in case I saw him with another girl. It broke my heart but he didn't notice. Or maybe he didn't care. He was Dan after all. Dan who only seemed to care about these girls. His best friend came second now. I wasn't important to him anymore.
That absolutely killed me.
So I started to go out and stay out for as long as I could. I couldn't handle being stuck in there with him acting like this.
That was when I first discovered the only way to get my Dan back.
I was out for one of my long walks when I saw Dan's latest girl stumbling out of a nearby pub on her own and obviously heavily intoxicated. Just seeing her filled me with such an anger I had to stop myself from hitting her right then. She somehow managed to tumble a little and fall to the floor, right at my feet. She looked up and our eyes met. She gazed for a few seconds before it obviously clicked who I was in her mind and she smiled at me. Although the anger was still burning strongly inside of me. I held out my hand to help her up. She gladly took it, giggling softly to herself as she draped her arms over my shoulder and pointed into the distance.
"Take me home, Phil" she slurred, giggling to herself again "Dan says you'll do anything he tells you too so you should do the same for me"
I wanted to simply dump her back onto the floor and leave her there for that remark. But then, that's when an idea hit me.
"Of course" I said through gritted teeth, helping her walk along the road. After about fifteen minutes of her going on and on about how great Dan was and how he was all hers I just couldn't take it anymore. I made a sharp turn into a dark alleyway where I knew no one who had any common sense would even think of going. She tried to look into my eyes in the very little light we had to walk though. When I stopped, that's when she voiced her question.
"Where are we going. My house isn't this way"
"I know" I replied flatly, letting go of her and watching her struggle to stay up. A small laugh escaped my lips as she fell to the ground. She just glared up ay me with a spiteful look.
"Dan was right. You are a horrible person"
I stopped laughing then, the smile completely falling from my face as I started at her. I slowly crouched down beside her and gripped her almost fully open shirt as I glared at her.
"What did you say?" I asked in a hushed tone.
"You heard me, you dick. Dan doesn't even like you, he thinks you're horrible and so do the rest of us" she smirked almost evilly "Everybody hates you Phil"
I don't know what made me do what I did next. Maybe it was the anger, or the hurt. Or maybe it was just because she'd said the one thing I didn't want to hear. I grabbed a fairly large stone and smashed it into the girl's head. She tried to scream but I hit her again. Again and again and again until I was out of breath and panting. I stared down at the thing that was once a pretty little girl that Dan had fucked.
Not anymore.
It only then occurred to me what I had just done. The girl beside me was probably dead and I had killed her. For what? because she said some stuff I didn't like. I was in serious trouble if I ever got found out for this. I quickly stood up, shoving the blood covered stone in my bag and staring down at the now lifeless body.
************************************************** *******************
I lost count of how many times that happened. Every time one of his girls wouldn't pick up the phone or answer any of his texts. Dan would tell me about it and I would just hug him and tell him it would be okay. Of course he didn't know that I had all their phones, permanently switched off. After about the third girl just 'disappeared' he started to act like we used to be. We were closer than ever and he would cuddle into me and cry about how he loved which ever one he was on about that day. Of course he didn't love them. He was young and he didn't know anything about love.
After the fifth girl he didn't see anymore. He stopped making videos. Spent his days watching movies with me on the couch cuddled up into my side crying. Of course I felt bad for making him like this. He was sad yet he only smiled around me. I made him laugh. I made him smile. Not any of those stupid girls. It was all me.
Eventually the bodies where found. Of course, I had taken every item of ID so they had no idea who they were. Yet somehow they managed to identify one girl. It was on the news. It was everywhere. And of course the moment he saw one of the girls he 'loved' faces on the screen he broke down.
"Why would someone do this?" he asked between sobs as he clung to me tightly.
I didn't answer, only gently stroked his back making small noises of comfort. I know I shouldn't have been happy in that moment but I was. He trusted me and he loved me. I knew he did. He loved me like I loved him. He didn't love those girls. he loved me. All me.
"Phil?" he asked weakly after a few minutes of silence.
"Yeah?"
"You'll never leave me, right?"
I smiled, gently kissing his forehead and wiping away a single tear with my thumb. He smiled back, leaning into my touch.
"Of course not Dan, You're mine forever"