AN: I wrote this on a whim. I thought it was okay so I put it up. Basicly It's the thoughts going through Nuriko's head durring the time when the warriors start out to look for the Shinzaho. When he's becoming more guy-like
Discliamer: I don't own Fushigi Yugi
Why is peace so hard to find? Just when you think you are happy something happens. Something changes. Life evolves and you want something else. Everything about you changes, you don't want what you wanted yesterday. No, you want something new, something that was always there yet isn't the same as it use to be. And with that one change everything else changes, how you act, how you look, hold yourself, maybe even to a point who you are. So am I someone I wasn't yesterday? Am I now a diferent person or am I the same? I don't sound like myself, I don't do things I would've done before. Instead I talk like someone I don't know and do things I never thought I would. If I am someone new what happened to the old person. Did I kill them, or just lock them away till I need them? Does that make me a murderer? Or am I the old person watching as the other controls what I do and say? I do things without thinking so maybe I no longer have control of my self? But if that's true why aren't I scared? Why am I not afraid that I'll do something that I shouldn't? No, I'm not afraid of this change because I'm still here and If I have to I'll kill the new me the old me or anyone I have to to protect her. Why, I wanted to protect her before but why do I feel this strongly now? Why? What is this? I can't be in love! I love someone else, someone I don't stand a chance with. Heh, Have I become straight? Normal? Have I finally left Kouran behind? Or am I being foolish? Am I going to go running back to her to hide like I always have? Or is she following me waiting for me to fail? Waiting for me to go back? Why am I thinking these things?! Who am I? I don't even know myself. . . . . She's beautiful. In her own little way. She's no model, but something about her just shines through her and touches everyone she meets. I see. She did this she changed me, she made me what I am now, someone I don't know, who dose things I would have never imagined. Someone I like, I am ready for whatever the future brings. I don't know myself yet, but maybe she can teach me something about this new me . . . this improved me. One who can touch the sky. Maybe I haven't found peace yet, but I'm sure enjoying the search.
Discliamer: I don't own Fushigi Yugi
Why is peace so hard to find? Just when you think you are happy something happens. Something changes. Life evolves and you want something else. Everything about you changes, you don't want what you wanted yesterday. No, you want something new, something that was always there yet isn't the same as it use to be. And with that one change everything else changes, how you act, how you look, hold yourself, maybe even to a point who you are. So am I someone I wasn't yesterday? Am I now a diferent person or am I the same? I don't sound like myself, I don't do things I would've done before. Instead I talk like someone I don't know and do things I never thought I would. If I am someone new what happened to the old person. Did I kill them, or just lock them away till I need them? Does that make me a murderer? Or am I the old person watching as the other controls what I do and say? I do things without thinking so maybe I no longer have control of my self? But if that's true why aren't I scared? Why am I not afraid that I'll do something that I shouldn't? No, I'm not afraid of this change because I'm still here and If I have to I'll kill the new me the old me or anyone I have to to protect her. Why, I wanted to protect her before but why do I feel this strongly now? Why? What is this? I can't be in love! I love someone else, someone I don't stand a chance with. Heh, Have I become straight? Normal? Have I finally left Kouran behind? Or am I being foolish? Am I going to go running back to her to hide like I always have? Or is she following me waiting for me to fail? Waiting for me to go back? Why am I thinking these things?! Who am I? I don't even know myself. . . . . She's beautiful. In her own little way. She's no model, but something about her just shines through her and touches everyone she meets. I see. She did this she changed me, she made me what I am now, someone I don't know, who dose things I would have never imagined. Someone I like, I am ready for whatever the future brings. I don't know myself yet, but maybe she can teach me something about this new me . . . this improved me. One who can touch the sky. Maybe I haven't found peace yet, but I'm sure enjoying the search.