Author's note: Sorry for the OOCness of the characters and what not. This *coughs*story*coughs* is co-written with Anonymously Awesome.

Warnings: Randomness, chara death, mild language, violence and slight shonen ai (boyxboy). Oh, and there are OCs in this. If any of that bugs you, leave. Simple as that ^^

Fye aimed the .45 Glock at Envy shakily, uncertainty in his eyes.

"He's never killed someone before, he can't do it!" cried Kain, his hands fumbling over themselves as he tried to think of what he could do.

Envy sneered, "So, pipsqueak? All this because I won't give Ed back his cookie? How pathetic." Envy clapped his hands slowly as they turned into razorblades.

"No! Don't! We have to stop him! He's never killed anyone!" Kain cried, hand on his gun, "I need a fucking gun!"

Leonardo raised an eyebrow, "Really? What about the time he massacred an entire city?"

"And got away?" Ed adds.

"He's never killed anyone!"

"Or the time he killed his creators?" Sothe asked.

"And got away?" Ed adds…again.

"He's never killed anyone!"

"Or how about the time he gutted his brother?" Roxis asked.

"And got away."

"He's never killed anyone!"

"What about that time after he escaped from prison and killed everyone in the village?" Leo said.

"And got away."

"He's never killed anyone!"

"Or when he killed every single friend?" Sothe offered skeptically.

"And got away."

"He's never killed anyone!"

"What about the time he killed every member of his fan-site?" Roxis chimed in again.

"And got away."

"Would you stop saying that?" Roxis asked annoyed as he glared at Ed.

"What? I need SOMETHING to do…you know, besides stand here looking pretty." Ed replied matter-of-factly.

"…Pretty isn't exactly the word I'd use to describe you, pipsqueak." Envy remarked.

"WHO DID YOU SAY WAS A MICROSCOPIC SHORT BEAN THAT DOESNT SHOW UP IN YOUR EYES?" Ed screamed.

"…He didn't say anything about…never mind." Sothe groaned and face-palmed.

"He's never killed anyone!" Kain shouted again…for unknown reasons.

Fye gripped the handle and pulled back the hammer, "Shut up, Kain…"

"But he's never killed anyone!"

Blam! Blam! Blam! Three shots were placed deep into Envy, who screamed and writhed, cookie in hand. "Fuck you, pipsqueak! Fuck you!" With his dying moments, he devoured the cookie so that Ed may never again hold it in his hands and taste it's peanut-buttery goodness.

Kain did not see, he just kept screaming, "He's never killed anyone before! He can't do it! Even if he does, he'll go insane from bloodlust!"

"…But he just killed Envy…" Leo pointed out.

Fye groaned and walked forward, the gun still smoking.

"Oh my God! He killed that crazy guy who looks like a buff, flat girl! He's gonna go insane with bloodlust! Everybody run!"

Fye reached them just as Kain left the area. With a smile, he said, "Well, that's too bad. I was gonna take everyone out for more cookies, but I guess he doesn't want to come. Shame, really. Just a shame. Now, where is Roxis Rosenkrantz, the snotty bastard? HE MUST DIE!"