Drain
By Angst no Miko
Standard Disclaimers Applied
Talk to me troubled brain And if you can feel my pain So much is living in my head Now I can barely breathe And now my heart's diseased And my name and my life has been stepped on and on!
You made a fool of me There is no way out I'm going down the drain
I walk around the streets of the town we were now. It's already midnight and yet I have no indication that I was supposed to go home. I know I don't want to face the man with cobalt eyes that stares you with all its coldness. I don't want to face the man that broken my heart and captured my soul and placed it into the oblivion. I don't want to face the man that would obviously ignore me while he typed his report in his laptop.. Who would blame him that his partner became his ex and everything seems like a mess.
"This is hopeless!!!!" I cried to myself. I scratched my head in annoyance as I walked towards the direction of our abode. I think I need a fix for myself..
I unlocked the door and shut it in silence like it would make any difference if I shut it loud enough to wake up the devil himself. I smirked as I mentioned the devil and pitied myself.. Everything is about pity. Everything is nothing...
And yes, I can still hear him typing away on his little box for his reports that I don't when he would submit it. I headed to the bathroom and locked the door. I opened the medicine cabinet and hastily grabbed the shining metal of the razor. I positioned it over my wrist and readied myself for the pain that I would feel when I do the deed. All I have to do is slash.. Slash..
The pain was unbearable but worth it. It clears my clouded head. Clouded by the thoughts of him running through my head. It seems hours that I looked myself on the mirror. I squinted my eyes as I wash over the wound. The water stinging at a newly fresh mark and the skin being cleaned by the stain of the redness.
I should have braced myself. It's been so long since I've started doing this some sort of a ritual of releasing my pain and clearing my head.
*Flashback*
"I don't need you anymore."you said. You're cobalt eyes were cold. All the warmness that once been there was replaced by the coldness that refused to let the past dictates the future.
"I've got Relena now."
I shouted your name and trying to wake and saying that it isn't true. But you walked away just like that. Like we were just a figment of your imagination. That we had was only an illusion that it never became real. But you continued to walk away just like that.
Unfortunately, the team is still there. We need to act civil to each other. We are after all still partners and I doubt that the doctors will change that.
The name of god in vain You pushed me I'm insane Dissolution is knocking on my door Can't stop my bitter tears Can't take away my fears Body and soul blown up into the pieces
Let me drain!.... my feelings out Laugh like a drain..my emotions screams Let me drain!
I shut my eyes eyes as I remember all of the times I cursed God for this unfair life. First my parents then the orphanage then the only person that I thought that understood my pain, my loneliness, my heart, my soul.
I opened the bathroom door and I still your laptop being bombarded by words that make up your report. I walked towards that we share as well and slipped on my night clothes. I carefully bandaged my wrist and climb to bed. I took off the band that held my chestnut brown hair and tried to get to sleep.
So I can speak my mind? Anata sae mo blind! I am left in a land with just solitude Has this become my fate Who's next to be your bait? Vicious cycle repeating on and on!
Oh Cry out I want to be loved Dry out I want to see dreams Oh Cry out I want to be free Dry out I want to know truth
I was awakened by a gentle caress from my right side. I opened my eyes and saw you towering me over the bed.
"I need you Duo.." You said and you sat down on the bed. It creaked at the added weight. You kissed me ever so softly. I wanted to believe that we are together again and yet something is holding me back.
"NO." I whispered and tried to push you away. "No." I said it again, tears started to well up in my eyes.
"You are so pathetic Duo." you said, smirking at the current situation. You turned your back and went to your side of the room.
"Go back to sleep. I don't want to fuck a fucked up person like you. I'd rather sleep." you said as you lay down on your bed. I lay back down as well. The last thing I heard before I go back to the nirvana that cares for me was I was a pathetic loser.
-0-
The war was about to end. And peace would be restored once again. I was glad that everything is finished. Everything should end.
I pushed a button that was well hidden in the corner my gundam. I installed it for this purpose alone. Everything became black and I knew I was falling down into an abyss. Falling and falling.
I know everything is over as well as I.
Standard Disclaimers Applied
Talk to me troubled brain And if you can feel my pain So much is living in my head Now I can barely breathe And now my heart's diseased And my name and my life has been stepped on and on!
You made a fool of me There is no way out I'm going down the drain
I walk around the streets of the town we were now. It's already midnight and yet I have no indication that I was supposed to go home. I know I don't want to face the man with cobalt eyes that stares you with all its coldness. I don't want to face the man that broken my heart and captured my soul and placed it into the oblivion. I don't want to face the man that would obviously ignore me while he typed his report in his laptop.. Who would blame him that his partner became his ex and everything seems like a mess.
"This is hopeless!!!!" I cried to myself. I scratched my head in annoyance as I walked towards the direction of our abode. I think I need a fix for myself..
I unlocked the door and shut it in silence like it would make any difference if I shut it loud enough to wake up the devil himself. I smirked as I mentioned the devil and pitied myself.. Everything is about pity. Everything is nothing...
And yes, I can still hear him typing away on his little box for his reports that I don't when he would submit it. I headed to the bathroom and locked the door. I opened the medicine cabinet and hastily grabbed the shining metal of the razor. I positioned it over my wrist and readied myself for the pain that I would feel when I do the deed. All I have to do is slash.. Slash..
The pain was unbearable but worth it. It clears my clouded head. Clouded by the thoughts of him running through my head. It seems hours that I looked myself on the mirror. I squinted my eyes as I wash over the wound. The water stinging at a newly fresh mark and the skin being cleaned by the stain of the redness.
I should have braced myself. It's been so long since I've started doing this some sort of a ritual of releasing my pain and clearing my head.
*Flashback*
"I don't need you anymore."you said. You're cobalt eyes were cold. All the warmness that once been there was replaced by the coldness that refused to let the past dictates the future.
"I've got Relena now."
I shouted your name and trying to wake and saying that it isn't true. But you walked away just like that. Like we were just a figment of your imagination. That we had was only an illusion that it never became real. But you continued to walk away just like that.
Unfortunately, the team is still there. We need to act civil to each other. We are after all still partners and I doubt that the doctors will change that.
The name of god in vain You pushed me I'm insane Dissolution is knocking on my door Can't stop my bitter tears Can't take away my fears Body and soul blown up into the pieces
Let me drain!.... my feelings out Laugh like a drain..my emotions screams Let me drain!
I shut my eyes eyes as I remember all of the times I cursed God for this unfair life. First my parents then the orphanage then the only person that I thought that understood my pain, my loneliness, my heart, my soul.
I opened the bathroom door and I still your laptop being bombarded by words that make up your report. I walked towards that we share as well and slipped on my night clothes. I carefully bandaged my wrist and climb to bed. I took off the band that held my chestnut brown hair and tried to get to sleep.
So I can speak my mind? Anata sae mo blind! I am left in a land with just solitude Has this become my fate Who's next to be your bait? Vicious cycle repeating on and on!
Oh Cry out I want to be loved Dry out I want to see dreams Oh Cry out I want to be free Dry out I want to know truth
I was awakened by a gentle caress from my right side. I opened my eyes and saw you towering me over the bed.
"I need you Duo.." You said and you sat down on the bed. It creaked at the added weight. You kissed me ever so softly. I wanted to believe that we are together again and yet something is holding me back.
"NO." I whispered and tried to push you away. "No." I said it again, tears started to well up in my eyes.
"You are so pathetic Duo." you said, smirking at the current situation. You turned your back and went to your side of the room.
"Go back to sleep. I don't want to fuck a fucked up person like you. I'd rather sleep." you said as you lay down on your bed. I lay back down as well. The last thing I heard before I go back to the nirvana that cares for me was I was a pathetic loser.
-0-
The war was about to end. And peace would be restored once again. I was glad that everything is finished. Everything should end.
I pushed a button that was well hidden in the corner my gundam. I installed it for this purpose alone. Everything became black and I knew I was falling down into an abyss. Falling and falling.
I know everything is over as well as I.